That time of year, the FALL-ing away

I'm crashing, in slow motion, and I'm so exhausted almost all the time I don't really care. This happens every Fall. My anxiety level is maxed all the time and nobody understands that I'm not going to get it together for a while. They blame me. So do I. This all feeds the depression that makes me give up on EVERYTHING. I see both my psych team Tuesday. I'm so tired that I didn't care if I kissed or had sex for a week. Mega dosing caffeine to probably dangerous levels helps me do the minor things, but that's bad for anxiety and really bad for my insides and even effects my vision a little. So here I am again, alone, coping with feeling like crap, and not really hoping for better, or worse, or anything at all. There's parties I'm invited to, but not going. I'm just over it all tonight.

I generally take a marked dive in the Fall. So does my husband. It's quite a balancing act for us to get through it together!

I am sorry you are feeling overwhelmed. I hope you get some relief soon!


WC

I'm sorry that people don't understand what low energy and other symptoms of depression are all about. I do. I guess it's hard to explain to some, but if people very close to you don't, it's time they get educated. Can you bring any significant person that doesn't with you to your appointment? If it is a boss, and they're judging your performance, maybe a note from a doctor would help. They need not indicate your illness. They can think it's something else. Mono, chronic fatigue syndrome, whatever.

I hope your doctor can perhaps adjust your treatment to bring some energy back. In my experience, that has sometimes meant the addition of an activating medication, sometimes the reduction of a sedating one, sometimes a satisfying break/vacation, and/or a new therapy approach. Maybe also ask if other factors may be contributing, like thyroid, lack of daily light, vitamin deficiency, etc.

I was really depressed one winter. They did blood tests and found out I was Vitamin D deficient (not surprising because I never go outside). I was also a little low on iron, so now I take supplements for both. If you haven't had bloodwork done in a while, it might be a good idea to do it.

Had blood tested early this month. I'm always a little iron deficient but never enough to take iron supplements. Nothing was abnormal. I started taking extra D yesterday of my own choice, trying anything. Going to workout tomorrow regardless of how I feel and haven't stopped that at all. I'm going back to bed now.

I hope you start feeling better.
I'm the oppositte, my mood goes up in the autumn/ winter, but I wanted to give you my support

Fall is bad for me, too. I also think you need to consult your doctor instead of accepting it as a given. Okay? Please?

Fall is bad for me too. I feel trapped by the winter and everyone just annoys me with their attitude.

This fall has been bad for me too, and the cloudy and gloomy and rainy weather isn't helping. My anxiety is at an all time high too. No words of wisdom. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

I get a few moments of good, which I cling to as if they're my lifelines, then moments later I can't remember what was so good about them anyway. I'm going to try something that a lot of people would call really stupid tonight if the opportunity is there, but it's also the one thing I can't get out of my head... Someone I've been crushing on for a long time dropped a few hints within the past week. If she's around I'm going to put myself out there, yet again, and see what happens. The worst could happen is I'll get letdown, but when you're near bottom, down isn't that much further. I'm going to the gym in any way. I need exercise. It's almost time to go now.

Doc adjusted my meds. We'll see what happens

Most of my hospitalizations have been this time of year.

I've usually needed hospital this time of year, whether or not I've been. I don't feel like I do need right now, and I'm hoping the med changes will help. Last year, I went homeless in December, which I probably needed hospitalization then, too. It was 7 degrees Fahrenheit out and I was sleeping in my truck. I was hospitalized for two weeks in winter 2016. It goes on and on. I usually feel BAD from about late October through February. Gonna shower and go out for a while now. I've kinda been invited over somewhere and I want to go but I don't feel like going. I really want to climb under my covers and sleep until the sun's out again. It's almost dark and not even 7 yet.

Some of my worst episodes were during the Fall too. When it hits, it hits really hard and feels like there's no way out. My meds always have to be adjusted during this time.

It's good that your doctor adjusted your medication. At times like this, the sooner the adjustment, the better, so you are off to a positive start (even though it often feels like an episode is never going to end). I hope you find some relief soon enough.

I didn't go out or shower. I made food and climbed back under the covers and had a lot of nightmares all night. At least the sun is up now. I guess I'll start a day.

I was hospitalized the past two Halloweens. I'm not in the hospital now, but I'm struggling with an episode. There's something about this time of year.

I’ve had more SI and SH thoughts. I honestly didn’t relate it to fall but now I wonder. I don’t like the feeling of winter, snow and cold coming and being trapped indoors and the stressor of Christmas looming.

Hugs to everyone struggling

I don't buy a single Christmas gift. I refuse to. It's all just perpetuating the gimme attitude in people, and that is very unhealthy. We should really consider why the Christians choose to celebrate something on a day that would be one of the most violent holidays of the year. I'm debating on staying home for Christmas anyway. Sleep in, watch crap I like, and drink coffee.
But, today is Halloween, and there's yoga later. Maybe I'll get elliptical time too. I've been promised sex later but dunno if I want to. I don't love her and don't see a future with her. She knows this.
Not nearly as sleepy today after meds were changed as of last night.

Violent holiday ?

Very toned down for truTV, even, but close enough.

Believe it or not I have a data limit and trying to watch a video would take about an hour.

I live in the middle of nowhere we only have one internet provider. We get only 5 gb a month. Shocking I know

Sorry I can’t watch it

Heading from fall into winter is usually not a good time for me either. Just wanted you to know you’re not alone. I hope you feel better soon.