I had ECT today, it went smoothly. We're going down to once a week to hopefully lessen the cognitive side effects. I'm hoping I can decrease my clozaril dose too. I'm getting fat and it's making me feel like crap. I need to go clothes shopping because I'm running out of clothes that fit. I'm also breaking out with tons of acne.
Mood wise I'm doing alright though. Every now and then I hear the voices. It's not really bothering me, just keeping me from focusing on whatever I need to do.

[Moose72]

Went to dr for ER follow up. New dr.. Put me on blood pressure meds. Could make me feel faint but its a really low dose.

[yellow_fleurs]

Woke up depressed this morning and groggy, but throughout the day felt a little better. I really think the job and schedule is helping me stay more stable, cannot sit around and ruminate alone so much when depressed. I am super grateful for that. Still irritable, though, and feeling off. Looking forward to having another appointment with my therapist tomorrow.

[Victoria'smom]

So they're "done" with our apartment. They're not replacing the floors. If we want them changed it's on us. Oh well. Hud comes to inspect on the 7th and we'll fail and tell them that our complex says that we have to pay for it.

[Moose72]

I cant contact my therapist. Shes left me a couple messages but i never seem to catch her calls. She makes her own schedule.

Ever just wish you could run away?

I feel like running away sometimes, but know that if I did, I'd be missing my husband almost immediately.

My husband is a very sweet man, but he has the ability to win arguments with me most of the time, and that can be frustrating. He's not a totally controlling type, but does control our situation more than I do. At least to my perspective. Back when I worked full-time and seemed sufficiently "able", I felt I had more of a say in things, though not more than him. At least not for the really big things. Now my say seems even more limited. He does seem like the head of the household, while before we were more equally so.

When I daydream about running away, I don't want to hurt him that much. I think to myself that I'd leave him everything, even my disability income. I don't have much of my "own" money, though, besides the disability. I realize that to run away would mean I'd pretty much be on the streets. Obviously, I don't want that. He'd also be desperate if I ran away. So, I won't do it.

[Moose72]

Yes- i dream about that too- but i have kids that would be upset if i did.

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Lol! Re: the ghost story.

I am sorry you'll need surgery. I've had a lot of ENT surgery. I think you will do okay with it, even though it's a nuisance. I hope the ENT gave you a detailed description of the surgery?

I hope things are going better at work!

Thinking of you!

WC

Yeah, the ENT doctors gave me several pages of documents to read. I actually saw two ENT's today because the first one was at a loss and so she grabbed another doctor to come look at me. He was the one who suggested surgery.

Now I'm getting a 2nd opinion from Mass Eye and Ear, just to be safe. I figure they're my best bet since they're top doctors. I just don't know how much $$$ it'll cost if I go through them since you pay for quality.

[Sunflower123]

Finally home from the hospital. Yay!! Feels good to relax (and to eat) after two days. They were able to explain (and can fix) the most symptomatic problems and will do a biopsy on what they did find. It will take about two weeks to get that report back but I feel hopeful. Much relieved tonight.

Sending out hugs to those that need them.

[Fuzzybear]

hugs to all who need them

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I finally slept last night and into today. I am still exhausted but feel much better. Hopefully things turn around now. I'd love to fall asleep early tonight.

TheSeaCat, Charlie is doing much better on his gold nuggest (costs that much) diet. His sister (Abby) is doing well too and fortunately likes the gold nuggets because I can't imagine trying to feed 2 separate diets in a 2 room apartment without Charlie getting into stuff he shouldn't. It's hard enough to keep him from grabbing things I drop or set down for a minute before walking into the kitchen.

I have to change my sheets. I love fresh sheets but I am so tired I dread doing this. I feel like a baby but it is hard when I'm still so tired.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by bluebicycle

Yeah, the ENT doctors gave me several pages of documents to read. I actually saw two ENT's today because the first one was at a loss and so she grabbed another doctor to come look at me. He was the one who suggested surgery.

Now I'm getting a 2nd opinion from Mass Eye and Ear, just to be safe. I figure they're my best bet since they're top doctors. I just don't know how much $$$ it'll cost if I go through them since you pay for quality.

I am glad to know the docs gave you information.
Yes! M *** Eye and Ear is a great place! Great idea! I think it's very wise to get another opinion or so. It's a little odd that one doc was so unsure.

About cost, I think your insurer negotiates a rate. It may make a difference if they are "in network" or "out of network" though. You can contact your insurer to see what they would cover at any given location.

You are right on top of things, as per usual!


WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Finally home from the hospital. Yay!! Feels good to relax (and to eat) after two days. They were able to explain (and can fix) the most symptomatic problems and will do a biopsy on what they did find. It will take about two weeks to get that report back but I feel hopeful. Much relieved tonight.

Sending out hugs to those that need them.

(((((( Jennifer ))))))

Sounds like good news, so far!
This is wonderful!


WC

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

So they're "done" with our apartment. They're not replacing the floors. If we want them changed it's on us. Oh well. Hud comes to inspect on the 7th and we'll fail and tell them that our complex says that we have to pay for it.

If the apartment building had a leak why would you be failed and expected to fix it ?

I’m confused ?!

[giddykitty]

Had my second official DBT session today. It went well apparently even though by the end I was a little confused by what my therapist said to me. All and all though, I think I followed pretty well despite it being a little complicated. My "homework" is to document any problems/problem behaviors I encounter until my next session, document in full detail answering these pages of questions. It seems like a lot, but it's really just challenging me to fully analyze my problems and possibly in different ways than I have been in the past and hopefully come to find some ways to either prevent or to repair the problem. Can I do it?? It feels a little intimidating but my therapist is trying to encourage me that I'm doing well in session. (so far is what goes on in my mind. I need to learn to let that be enough)

I hope it's ok me rambling about my session. It kinda helps me to recap. The specifics of my problems feel a bit personal, not that it's anything others haven't been through in some form or another, I'm sure, but I still hesitate. It's all part of this journey of overcoming my anxiety and overcoming my other problems. Well, thanks for listening.

Hugs!

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I finally slept last night and into today. I am still exhausted but feel much better. Hopefully things turn around now. I'd love to fall asleep early tonight.

TheSeaCat, Charlie is doing much better on his gold nuggest (costs that much) diet. His sister (Abby) is doing well too and fortunately likes the gold nuggets because I can't imagine trying to feed 2 separate diets in a 2 room apartment without Charlie getting into stuff he shouldn't. It's hard enough to keep him from grabbing things I drop or set down for a minute before walking into the kitchen.

I have to change my sheets. I love fresh sheets but I am so tired I dread doing this. I feel like a baby but it is hard when I'm still so tired.

I am glad you have gotten some sleep! I also hope you get plenty more tonight!


Wc

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I have clean sheets and took a shower. Now I just need sleep.

Changing sheets with 2 adolescent cats is quite the challenge and I should have worn myself out with the battle

[Victoria'smom]

If the apartment building had a leak why would you be failed and expected to fix it ? I think they fixed the ceiling but not the floors. I have no idea what I'm walking into tomorrow. I can't have a place that has mold my two boys have lung issues. We'll see how it is tomorrow. If anything I guess they can move us apartments. I don't know why they didn't replace the carpet. We'll see I guess.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

If the apartment building had a leak why would you be failed and expected to fix it ? I think they fixed the ceiling but not the floors. I have no idea what I'm walking into tomorrow. I can't have a place that has mold my two boys have lung issues. We'll see how it is tomorrow. If anything I guess they can move us apartments. I don't know why they didn't replace the carpet. We'll see I guess.

It’s still there responsible to clean up repair or replace, there are companies that can vacuum up water so the there will be no mold. I’d get something in writing that x was done Incase you and your family get sick. Is it section 8 housing who will come out and check ? If so they can make sure things are done right

[Pookyl]

Manic.
Know that I’m supposed to take prn’s etc. But I don’t care.

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

I have clean sheets and took a shower. Now I just need sleep.

Changing sheets with 2 adolescent cats is quite the challenge and I should have worn myself out with the battle

I'm glad to hear that Charlie and Abby are doing well with the diet.

Changing anything with any cats is quite the challenge, my boys are three and they still get into everything, and yes making that bed is a special task with them around. I hope you have good sleep tonight.

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by Wild Coyote

Great news!

It's wonderful you can work and do an internship in the same place!
I love Starbuck's coffee, too! Starbucks or Peet's. Both are great!

So glad your eyes are smiling! Twinkle! Twinkle!

Have fun on Halloween!


WC

We don't have Peet's around here. I'd love to try it sometime; my options tend to be Starbucks or McDonald's granted I love them both.

When he told me that I thought he was joking but I kind of see that happiness. Thank you for that it made me smile; you are far too kind.

The girls had a fun time tonight with trick or treating we went as Marvel characters. The movie was really good too. I should probably be heading to bed I have an early drive tomorrow for training.

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Finally home from the hospital. Yay!! Feels good to relax (and to eat) after two days. They were able to explain (and can fix) the most symptomatic problems and will do a biopsy on what they did find. It will take about two weeks to get that report back but I feel hopeful. Much relieved tonight.

Sending out hugs to those that need them.

I hope you get good news.

Originally Posted by ~Christina

It’s still there responsible to clean up repair or replace, there are companies that can vacuum up water so the there will be no mold. I’d get something in writing that x was done Incase you and your family get sick. Is it section 8 housing who will come out and check ? If so they can make sure things are done right

Is it? I don't know the laws, but my apartment complex forced me into buying renters insurance in case I damaged their place. Theirs was $7 a month and it only protected them, not me. So I bought my own insurance that protected by belongings and their property.

I do think it should be the the owner's responsibility, but there may be loopholes in the law or they could blame the damage on my own "negligence" even though it's their fault. If there are no loopholes, then I would demand them to fix everything.

[pirilin]

Doing great. My mistakes correct themselves. Unreal.
Being VERY lucky at the auctions. Gonna make a ton of $.
The money is made when you buy. Buy low, sell high.