[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by raging vortex

so the rest of the day... nothing special

got very little done

did end up having my roast this afternoon which was average (rated 5/10 on the rate your dinner thread), but nothing else to really write about

today is just what it was- hopefully tomorrow will be better (and I won't have any nasty flashbacks tonight)

I hope you have a peaceful, restful night!

[Wild Coyote]

I am starting to get anxious about my sleep study tomorrow night.

I still have a lot of, sometimes overwhelming, sleep anxiety. During my formative years, my violent father would often start his ranting at night. I would awaken to his violence/abuse. I won't go into details.

If H and I are in a hotel or some other strange setting at night, I get very little sleep. If I was alone in these settings, I would not sleep at all.

The sleep doctor, upon doing a complete interview, has been very understanding of my sleep anxiety/PTSD. He has invited my H to accompany me throughout the night at the sleep lab. He has arranged for my H to sleep in a recliner in the same room. My H understands my anxiety/PTSD and has agreed to accompany me.

On the one hand, I feel like it's unreasonable to have my H with me. On the other hand, we are not as apt to get as good of a sleep study if I am too anxious to sleep in the different setting.

I am very lucky to have the understanding of these two men. I am fortunate they are compassionate and will try to help me.

I am doing breathing exercises to calm my anxiety. I need to distract myself a bit more, as well.

I hope everyone has a good week!

Love to All!

WC

[hopeless2015]

Wishing you all the best tomorrow WC!!

Been in a bit of a dip lately. Slept most of today but just got up and put a meatloaf together and its oven for supper. Pdoc tomorrow at 8a.m.

Hugs to all

[Blueberrybook]

I had a low key day. Didn't do much, watched an episode of a show on my iPad. Hopefully, I can read some. I'm going to need to cook dinner, but all my meat is frozen. IDK, maybe we can do breakfast for dinner.

I think the added 100 mg of Seroquel (so now I'm on 500 mg total) is helping a bit with the racing thoughts. They are so bad they are like a buzz in my head. Not that I am hearing voices, it's my own thoughts, just one after another after another after another, on top of another, nonstop. I have been less irritable today, also I find I am not interrupting other people talking quite as much.

Oh, and this is a good positive (though it was because I'm on my cycle, but still), I did not weigh myself today

[Pookyl]

Coming up to 5 weeks stable and episode free.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

That's wonderful Pookyl

[tecomsin]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Wishing you all the best tomorrow WC!!

Been in a bit of a dip lately. Slept most of today but just got up and put a meatloaf together and its oven for supper. Pdoc tomorrow at 8a.m.

Hugs to all

Wishing my best to both of you and everyone on this board.

[wildflowerchild25]

Had a bad sinus headache most of the day. I’m still really congested from the cold. I need to go get some Sudafed but I didn’t feel like going out. So I’ll get it tomorrow after work. Hopefully I’ll feel better tomorrow anyway.

RS wants me and my son to join him for Christmas Eve at his aunt’s house. I’m happy. I’m glad he wants me to meet his family. I dated my ex for six months and never met any of his family. I mean meeting his family 5 weeks after we met is a little fast but if he’s not worried about it then neither am I. It will be nice to do something special for Christmas Eve instead of just staying home and doing nothing as usual. When I was a kid we used to have a big Czech/Polish dinner for Christmas Eve with my dad’s family. That stopped when he died. We’ve done nothing ever since.

I’ve got most of my Christmas shopping done, thank you Amazon. I just need to pick up gift cards for my cousins. I have plenty of time to do that. Then I have to go to the dollar store and get tape, scissors, clothes boxes, and cookie tins. My brother in law always gets chocolate chip cookies for Christmas from me and I’m going to give RS a variety of cookies as well. I have a lot of baking and candy making to do.

I hope I can kick this cold soon.

I'm really glad they're letting your husband be there with you for the sleep study, WC! I don't think it's unreasonable in the least -- it's good to let people help us when we need it. If it will help you, it's all good. He seems like a good man.

[Nammu]

Mum and I went to an afternoon Christmas concert. Was nice. Tomorrow is much more mundane, laundry and take mum in for a blood test. Have pain in my left side. Reminds me of gallbladder pain but can't be that cause I had my gallbladder out years ago. Trying to decide if it warrants professional attention. It's been two days but no other symptoms just pain.

Low key day. Made a bunch of dinner last night to not have to cook today. Spent the day working on a new craft (crepe paper flower-making). Lol, it took SO long to do! Started out a bit rocky, but turned out good.

Feeling a bit lonely. I planned to do what I'm doing today, so I don't know why it's bothering me. Weather is dreadful. Probably doesn't help. Using my light box. Actually right now as well. Curious to see if it can help wake me up a bit. Very tired way too early. Been waking up very early (the 2 or 3 am kind of early) and not getting back to sleep for another 2-3 hours. Then maybe sleep a couple more. (Except when I'm working and get up at 3:45. Yeah. Lol. For real.). Broken sleep is a drag.

Trying to pep up with some music too.

Lots of to those struggling. Sorry to not address specifically -- too tired.

[Moose72]

WC, when my eldest had his sleep study around age 16 i was required to stay with him. I slept on a couch that folded out. I use a cpap so i was familiar with sleep studies. My son slept well enough to get the info they needed. (Turned out it was his tonsils giving him the apnea and he had them out.)

[Sunflower123]

WC - You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers tonight and tomorrow night. I’m so glad H will be there with you. Sending big hugs and supportive vibes.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Mum and I went to an afternoon Christmas concert. Was nice. Tomorrow is much more mundane, laundry and take mum in for a blood test. Have pain in my left side. Reminds me of gallbladder pain but can't be that cause I had my gallbladder out years ago. Trying to decide if it warrants professional attention. It's been two days but no other symptoms just pain.

Hey Nammu,
Glad you'd enjoyed the concert!
I hope you get relief from the pain!


WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

Low key day. Made a bunch of dinner last night to not have to cook today. Spent the day working on a new craft (crepe paper flower-making). Lol, it took SO long to do! Started out a bit rocky, but turned out good.

Feeling a bit lonely. I planned to do what I'm doing today, so I don't know why it's bothering me. Weather is dreadful. Probably doesn't help. Using my light box. Actually right now as well. Curious to see if it can help wake me up a bit. Very tired way too early. Been waking up very early (the 2 or 3 am kind of early) and not getting back to sleep for another 2-3 hours. Then maybe sleep a couple more. (Except when I'm working and get up at 3:45. Yeah. Lol. For real.). Broken sleep is a drag.

Trying to pep up with some music too.

Lots of to those struggling. Sorry to not address specifically -- too tired.

Wow! 3:45!
Yes, broken sleep is a drag!
I hope you sleep soundly tonight!

WC

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by tecomsin

Well I am trying to find the right balance between rexulti and olanzapine so I sleep at night and am not having that heavy overmedicated feeling the next day or taking more than i need to. Last night I tried 1 mg Rexulti and 1.25 olanzapine.


It wasn't enough as I slept only till 5:45 am and didn't fall back asleep, so am tired today from lack of sleep. So I will try 2 mg rexulti and 1.25 olanzapine tonight. I am trying to figure out the lowest dose I can sleep through the night.

I think it’s great that your able to change up your meds to find out what’s best for you

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Moose72

WC, when my eldest had his sleep study around age 16 i was required to stay with him. I slept on a couch that folded out. I use a cpap so i was familiar with sleep studies. My son slept well enough to get the info they needed. (Turned out it was his tonsils giving him the apnea and he had them out.)

Hi Moose!

It's been over 20 years since my last study, where they'd given me medication to make me sleep. This lab does not give medication for sleep, so I am hoping for the best.

I wish I could blame my insomnia (or apnea) on my tonsils, but I'd had them out about 20 years ago.

Thanks!


WC

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Had another great night with RS. I know it’s very soon but he met my son and hung out with him for awhile. My logic is that my ex met my son later and he didn’t like him and didn’t like how I parented so I want to know now if they can get along because I’m not gonna waste my time on someone who doesn’t like my son. Thankfully they got along great even though my son acted like a complete fool alll night. Not like a brat, he wasn’t being disrespectful or anything, but he was WAY too excited about the whole thing. AND he told RS that I said I hoped he would be my last boyfriend I had said that to my son a couple of nights ago. I was SO embarrassed. We haven’t even called each other boyfriend and girlfriend yet, I mean it’s only been five dates. Damn my son lol.


But anyway it was a great night and I’m looking forward to many more with him.

LOL at your son !!! Ha !

Glad your having a good guy in your guy . Enjoy ~

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

WC - You’ll be in my thoughts and prayers tonight and tomorrow night. I’m so glad H will be there with you. Sending big hugs and supportive vibes.

Thank you, Jennifer!

WC

[Sunflower123]

I’ve had a very low key weekend. Mainly decorating for Christmas and getting the house ready for my daughter who is coming home tomorrow for four days before she heads out on her camping trip.

I’ve recovered from my illness except for taking long naps which I could never do before. I could really get used to these naps. I curled up on the couch with my dog and fell asleep watching Christmas movies. It was nice and cozy on a rainy, dreary day. I also dream when I nap but don’t seem to at night.

Doing pretty good overall. I’ve been lonely today even though I’ve been busy. I never get lonely! I’m such an introvert you could put me on an island with a lifetime supply of books and I’d be fine. It’s disconcerting.

Hugs to all.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Wishing you all the best tomorrow WC!!

Been in a bit of a dip lately. Slept most of today but just got up and put a meatloaf together and its oven for supper. Pdoc tomorrow at 8a.m.

Hugs to all

Hopeless!

So happy to hear from you! I think of you often!
Sorry you are in a dip. I hope it resolves soon!

Thanks for your well wishes!

WC

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by beauflow

s


-----

I've gotten up, cried a bit like I have been doing for a few days and what seems to be my winter days for me... but did put dishes away. Didn't cry much either ((yay!)). My ex wanted to go to a few stores today, told him yesterday I'd go with him. I am looking forward to one store.

Been Obsessing a bit in my head, over upcoming medical Bills. I can see them generating on my insurance.

This is one thing added to lists of stress-- been"worried " about my urgent care bill from November due to a cyst I couldn't handle any more... and along with current doctor appointments going on..


I forget this year I signed up for HSA.. I just checked my HSA plan have enough to pay the urgent care bill at least. this makes me feel so relieved...


Decades of avoiding doctors because of a handful of reasons but also -- payment... was right on that line of I didn't make enough to really live, but I made enough that I couldn't get much help...((if I would have had a kid, I'd gotten help but no.. I couldn't do that for many reasons))....****** place to be and I sometimes thinks it's done on purpose ((like not personal but a "bigger plan"))).. any ways


Admittedly with other things this has been on my list of worry and be sure to not forget .


I've had an outbreak on my skin again, though another "this is life". I see general doctor tomorrow I am going to ask ... because this is fairly regular for me.. I saw an topical that I am wondering about... I am split in pills for this, like anything.


I never knew about these HSA plans before this employer, and my coworker friend explained to me what it was an how i could use it... I am glad right now I took his advice..

I’m struggling so much with up coming medical bills ( 3 specialist ) I’m scared to figure out how we can make even a small payment monthly. And now the new year brings deductibles

I feel your pain. Yes please get some help for the rash.

Hope you can continue to manage

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Moose72

Im feeling very midlife crisis lately. How does that mix with bipolar? I hate to think. This is no fun. Thinking of the old times- watching old movies, thinking of my honeymoon (divorced- why did i get divorced?), .... Just very down. Then tomorrow ill be back into slogging through the day. I need to do something but i am having a very hard time doing them. At least I showered today.


I guess I'm feeling nostalgic. At least my kids are still near me.

Get back into photography!! Enjoy the kids while they are young !!! Mine is 27 and I don’t get to see her as much as I’d like.

[~Christina]

I’m so glad your H can come along. Sleeping in a strange place wired up everywhere and expected to sleep is so difficult.

I’m relieved your bronchitis is going away , such a exhausting infection.

Many

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Pookyl

Coming up to 5 weeks stable and episode free.

Soooooo happy for you ! Now let’s make it 10