Those I do have, long lasting ones, kind of just accept I disappear from the face of the Earth.. often. Either phase I go through I tend to detach from the world in general. Depression causes me to not even be able to send a text back to someone. My highs have me so involved in other things I lose track. That's one of my biggest issues I guess -- not many stay constant in my life. I also will go months without talking to someone when I'm angry because well -- one of the two phases hit and I'm OK just not dealing with it.

It's part of personality too, I guess. I currently have my mom, and one friend that I talk to, occasionally. I don't talk with my siblings, I don't interact outside of my home. I'm kinda weird about it I guess.


Does anyone else have a hard time keeping friends, for whatever reason? People seem to really like me, and be drawn to me.. but I can't make 'em stay when I don't put energy into it. But a lot of times I feel I cant .

[Aurelius710]

I can relate. I have a very easy time making friends or at least falling in with a group of people that I like, but for whatever reason when it comes to maintaining those friendships, I can't be asked to. It's not that I don't like them, far from it, but I'm just... elsewhere. Too low to be motivated or too high to be any kind of good close friend. It doesn't help that most of my closest friends have already started the first day of the rest of their lives and I'm still stuck trying to finish my degree.

I try to enjoy the company of the people who do cross my path, but it's still isolating. Lonely.

[Fairy102]

I can relate too. I can actually make friends easily but keeping them is hard. It’s got to be me. I think I have a hard time getting close to people. I can go from happy confident to having nothing to say and don’t want to go anywhere. I have anxiety getting close to someone because I’ve had so many hurt me. Maybe it’s a chicken and the egg situation. It’s frustrating. I have my mom and one friend that I’ve had off and on for the last 15 years. Sometimes this feels like enough and other times it makes me so sad and lonely.

Yup. It's more so that I'm okay by myself. I don't really want friends-they're more trouble than they're worth from my experience.

[pirilin]

Friendships are like gardens. No water, no plants.

[Wander]

Almost every time I make new friends the Bipolar makes them run. I think the idea of it, my hospitalisations, and behaviour at times is beyond what they want to, or can bear. Making new friends can be tough for me, and when a little hypo I make heaps of friends, but not long standing ones.

I am lucky to be close to my mother and sister and see them once a week. I have a few friends that love me but I hardly see. It seems they hold back. I also have a partner, who has Bipolar, whom I love but catching up is random, depending on our various moods at the time. In reality I spend most of my time alone. As a social person this is tough.

Originally Posted by Brentus

Does anyone else have a hard time keeping friends, for whatever reason? People seem to really like me, and be drawn to me.. but I can't make 'em stay when I don't put energy into it. But a lot of times I feel I cant .

This. Exactly. I've made a real effort to be friendly, and get along with people for the most part, but going beyond that? Not so much. I keep to myself a LOT. It's funny, because people seem to have the impression that I'm super-friendly and stuff (like I'm really good at it, lol!), but really, it intimidates me. I recently started doing some MeetUps. It's good. I've still not broken my usual defenses though. I try, but I've got walls. I don't really know how to "do" friendship. I do get deeply devoted to "my" people, and would do just about anything for them. I don't know how much that works in reverse though....

I can't think of any instances of being mad and not talking to someone for an extended time. The thing that kill it for me is mainly depression. That drop-off-the-face-of-the-earth thing gets 'em every time. It's just so awkward to reconnect.

All to say, you're not alone.