Bipolar Check-In #38

Hi Blue,

i understand your reticence to anger your neighbor. I have found fern's suggestions very sound, as per usual. Fortunately, you often have schedule flexibility. it is best to get the varmits out of your space!

I want to go back to bed, too. i am very sleepy from extra pain meds, etc. I do have to push in order to meet some very real deadlines. Maybe can rest later.

I hope you have a great day!

Miracle of miracles- peter gave me 50 bucks! I already had 20 so now I can get food, gas, laundry soap, ..!

Well last night I broke my rules about eating and paid for it by throwing up again. Mum and I went to a church supper, it was at 5 so it was before my 6pm cut off but the proportions were large and I ate it all. It was delicious. Meatloaf, mashed potatoes and a corn pudding with jello. I didn't even eat the desert! I sure hope the doc has a magic pill or something cause the tiny amounts I'm eating are too little.

I hope the doctor figures something out soon, sorry you're getting sick when you eat

I went to the food pantry today, got enough stuff to get me through till my foodstamps come in on the 2nd. No panic attacks for 4 days now, very happy about that!

I'm really struggling to type anything using my laptop with my injured finger. Firstly, I shouldn't type with the finger at all, but even when I do, the Band Aid makes my finger so wide, that I make typos every time. Many of my posts these past few days have been made on my smart phone using my middle finger, but as I mentioned, it's grown quite sore. I'd hoped to give it a little rest.

This is all so frustrating! I had a really notable day today and have oodles to say, but you'll all be spared for now. Brace yourself for tomorrow.

I am sorry you are going through this.
How frustrating!!!
Do you think Hubby might have a stylus you can borrow?

If there is not one in the house, do you or Hubby know where you might get one? I generally grab a couple from Amazon every now and then, The tips wear out eventually. Sometimes, I can find a stylus with extra tips in the package.

With a laptop, you might use a pencil, with the eraser side down on the keys?
Maybe it is too cumbersome. I am just trying to think of something.

I've pushed through the pain and the fatigue and have finished a project. I do not mean to imply one can always push through the pain and the fatigue. Just sometimes we might be able to do so. I was blessed today in this way.

Off to see pdoc tomorrow. She and I must have a talk.
Should be interesting.

I hope everyone has a great night!

Checking in. Thank you to everyone who let me know through hugs and words that I was cared about. It meant a lot at a time that was bleak.

I got my hair cut today. It had grown to the small of my back. Surprisingly, the beautician said it was healthy. I had it cut to two inches below my shoulders. It feels great! I’ve been reborn.

I went to the dentist as well and received hugs all around. They said there is a significant difference from when I was depressed until now. They were proud of me.

M’s visit flew by. She wasn’t here but 2 days so we packed in the fun. I miss her already but will meet her in two weeks halfway between.

Back to being positive and empowering. Doing well.

Warm wishes to all and hugs to those that are struggling.

My mood crashed again... Having sui thoughts... Gonna go prepared to PHP tomorrow with a bag of clothes and everything...

I am still feeling like I was hit by a train. It didn't help that I had previously promised to babysit yesterday and my sister lives 2 hours away so I drove down, leaving a lot of extra time because I get lost very easily in their town, waited an hour, picked up my nieces, drove them home and did dinner and playtime and then drove back home after my BIL was home. I left before noon and got home at 8:30 which is a lot when feeling so tired anyway.

My pathology results (or some of them? I don't know how many things to wait for) are back and so far everything is clear. Yet the symptoms are already starting back up. I'll need to make an appointment for my GI to see what is next. I can't believe I went through bowel prep and didn't get any answers. I keep trying to remember it just means I don't have to do it when I'm 45 in 2 years. Some encouragement...

Anyway, time to get my meds and try to sleep. The last few nights I've fallen asleep in the range that usually means I'll be waking back up for several hours in the night and I've slept straight through except for the bathroom. That is a sign of how exhausted I am; I never can go to sleep so early without paying a price.

I’m sorry you are having such a tough time. It’s good you are going to PHP tomorrow. I hope all goes well.

Thanks. I really don't want to go to the hospital again. I'm lucky they even let me leave today. The pdoc kept asking multiple times if I could stay safe. I'm really not sure about tomorrow with the weekend and all...

Being prepared is a smart thing. You keep fighting and accepting support along the way. It is really inspiring to see.

Impressive! You continue to face things that give you great anxiety and discomfort. It is really brave of you.

I am sorry you are having a very challenging time.
I know it's very difficult while you are going through it. Please try to remember: after the darkness, there is light. I have struggled to believe this at times; yet, I have found it to be true when I hang in and stay open to healing and to change in my life.

Please let us know how you are doing when you can do so?

You are in my thoughts and in my prayers.

Much Love to You!

it must be so difficult to remain patient. I hope you have both relief and answers asap.
Sleep well.
Much Love

Happy dance!
You are feeling better!
Watch out world!
Much Love

pdoc called back and said wait 3-5 more weeks. So we wait, there's nothing else we can do without him being honest. We were able to trade in some trading cards for new ones.Now to open,sort and make new decks.

I’m glad you had a good day.

I’ve been quiet the last couple days. Which my husband is probably happy I’m literally losing my voice ! I’ve been quite chatty lately I have realized.

I hope feeling withdrawn eases up , it’s so hard to be stuck in your own head.

Oh I hate mice!!! Winter is coming and we always have to put out lots of bait/poison it’s like every mouse on every acre we own decides it wants to live under our house.

I’d get a barn cat but out one dog can’t tell the difference between a possum a squirrel and a cat.

have you ever heard of protonix? it is a prescribed med for gerd.
bizi

Ear plugs could help.

Oh thank god !!! What a relief

Oh no when do you see the Doctor ??