[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

I have a good impression of Brno, CZ. It has all one might want in a city, without many tourists. It has a slightly different look and feel than Prague, for sure. It's nice looking, but with less splendor. It's not nearly as crowded.

My one nephew asked for a nap, so we have to relax a bit before a third apartment viewing. We sort of liked the one we saw this morning, but it was on the forth floor (fifth in the US) with no elevator. Since ceilings are almost always high in CZ, that equals even more steps. My husband wished there was more than one toilet and bathroom, but that's not common, especially in apartments. Our plan is for my husband's best friend to stay with us some weeks of most months. An extra toilet/bathroom would be nice.

Good luck finding an apartment you like! Reminds me of a show on HGTV where a couple views three apartments and has to decide which one they like best. I've been spoiled with two bathrooms at my current place. One was the kids' and the other is in my bedroom. Of course, I'll be living alone so it will only be a problem when I have people over if we both have to pee at the same time!

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

**** man. I’m not in a good mood today at all. It’s almost like depressed but definite anger/ambivalence thrown into the mix. I just want to get into bed and stay there. I couldn’t sleep until 2am last night. I had to take an extra 12.5mg seroquel.

I think my meds are screwed up. It’s my fault. I’ve only been taking 100mg lamictal instead of 300. Because I don’t have enough to last until mid October when my insurance will pay for my next prescription. I’m confused as to how I could have run out if I got a 90 day supply in august. I have to investigate when I get home. Did I put the extra in my cabinet? Did I never pick up the lamictal because I still had some? But then why would my insurance deny the new script until mid October? I really don’t know. I must have extra somewhere, or else the pharmacy ****ed me over and only gave me 30 days. I have no idea. My brain is mush, has been for a very long time.

I left my wallet at home today so I can’t have lunch. I’m hungry. I can’t have anything until 4pm when I get home.

Work sucks today. Usually I have the patience for the nonsense but today I just don’t want to deal with it.

I hope I figure out the med situation. That has to be it, there’s no other triggers.

Don't you just hate it when things like this happen? It's like "What the HECK, Universe?!" Did you call your pdoc to find out what was written- if it was a 30-day, or a 90? And/or maybe the pharmacy can straighten it out?

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed

I feel much better today mental health wise then I did this weekend. But I went to the store today and I was binded to the point of being in pain and at least the employee called me he which made me so happy. But then for lunch I just ate a big bowl of spaghettios with franks while still wearing the binder and I took it off afterwards because I felt kinda blah and it’s kinda like from the Eminem song that goes “theres vomit on his sweater, spaghetti, moms spaghetti.” But I feel pretty good today besides the fact my chest hurts a bit and I’m kinda coughing now from the binder.

What is the binder for- are you FtM? I had to wear a special binding bra when I had a breast reduction. Was not too comfy- but it was necessary.

[wildflowerchild25]

My ****ing pharmacy is full of morons. I called my insurance after discovering that I had no lamictal hiding anywhere and after looking at the bottle, I confirmed that I had only received a 30 day supply. My insurance was confused as to why the pharmacy would say they denied it, because they did not. Ok, maybe I misunderstood the text? I call the pharmacy. They said oh, well, your doctor only sent over a 30 script and we informed them and they never called back (1 week ago). Ok....I guess I’ll call my doctor, even though I made sure to tell her to write a 90 day. Doctor’s office confirms that yes, they DID send a 90 script. WHAT THE ****. She said she would call the pharmacy herself, thank god, because I would have flipped ****. She called me back pretty quickly and said “yes, they will have it ready for you today, but I really think you should go to a new pharmacy. They do not have it together!” ****ING PREACH!!!! **** YOU, THREE LETTER PHARMACY!!!

Funny thing is this is actually a different three letter pharmacy than the one who royally ****ed me over with depakote last month. It’s the one across town. So I guess ALL of them in this town are run by idiots???

Oh, yes, so I go on my Insurance co website because **** this ****, I’m just gonna go through mail order. Oh, but is lamictal there? Oh, oh no, it’s not.

I need to collect myself before I can call them back because I am going to lose it. I’m gonna give it a few days.

Anyway. Work is done. I can go back to my regular dose so hopefully I’ll be ok in a couple of days.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by BethRags

I have to do laundry today and I'm anxious because I have 2 loads. Carrying the laundry basket is very heavy to carry to the laundry room and I have fear about my achilles hurting. And I tell myself, so what? Worse case I ask my husband to carry the laundry back up here (I live upstairs) when he comes over this evening.

The things I get myself wound up about

Then I do it, survive just fine, and tell myself, as I almost always do, that my anticipatory anxiety wasted hours and was not necessary, at all.

I do that too- anticipatory anxiety! That's a good name for it. Right now, I'm hoping the new apartment complex can get the paperwork finished and back to the section 8 worker. Then it's inspection time and I hope I pass. I will have anxiety over these two things until I move in!

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

My ****ing pharmacy is full of morons. I called my insurance after discovering that I had no lamictal hiding anywhere and after looking at the bottle, I confirmed that I had only received a 30 day supply. My insurance was confused as to why the pharmacy would say they denied it, because they did not. Ok, maybe I misunderstood the text? I call the pharmacy. They said oh, well, your doctor only sent over a 30 script and we informed them and they never called back (1 week ago). Ok....I guess I’ll call my doctor, even though I made sure to tell her to write a 90 day. Doctor’s office confirms that yes, they DID send a 90 script. WHAT THE ****. She said she would call the pharmacy herself, thank god, because I would have flipped ****. She called me back pretty quickly and said “yes, they will have it ready for you today, but I really think you should go to a new pharmacy. They do not have it together!” ****ING PREACH!!!! **** YOU, THREE LETTER PHARMACY!!!

Funny thing is this is actually a different three letter pharmacy than the one who royally ****ed me over with depakote last month. It’s the one across town. So I guess ALL of them in this town are run by idiots???

Oh, yes, so I go on my Insurance co website because **** this ****, I’m just gonna go through mail order. Oh, but is lamictal there? Oh, oh no, it’s not.

I need to collect myself before I can call them back because I am going to lose it. I’m gonna give it a few days.

Anyway. Work is done. I can go back to my regular dose so hopefully I’ll be ok in a couple of days.

Yay! That's great news that you can go back to your regular dose. Screw those stupid pharmacies!

[Living in LaLa Land]

Went to my new pdoc. He prescribed Clonidine for my insomnia, but I'm hesitant to take it because of reviews online. He also doubled my Trileptal dosage to stabilize me. So, I went from 600 mg total to 1200 mg. Hopefully, it'll work. I prefer to try the Trileptal, which puts me to sleep first before trying the Clonidine.

Any experience with the Clonidine?

Anyway, his first impression is good. He seems patient and willing to listen, not act as if he alone knows what's good for me like my previous pdoc. He even offer meditation and visualization as a tool to help me sleep. He doesn't believe in prescribing Benzos and when I said I didn't like antipsychotics (Tried two and that's enough for me), he didn't hassle me at all.

I see him next month, instead of the three months my previous pdoc would always put me on. Got my vitals done too. Something I never got at the old doc. The only thing is that I missed group, which I like. Oh well.

(I managed to go food shopping and go to Kohl's too. So I feel productive.)

EDIT: Should I jump from 600 mg a day to 1200 mg so fast? Or, should I jump to 900 to see how I am on it first?

[Moose72]

@Living in LaLa Land You can probably find a new group at your new place. Doesn't it feel nice to put away all the new groceries? After all that work of buying them, then carrying them in - In my case I will live on the 3rd floor soon so yeah talk about exercise!- and then wiping them down, it's sure nice to have your groceries put away. Makes me feel good to know I've got food in the house. What did you get a Kohl's? I'm not sure that you should go up to 900 first. What's the harm in going to 1200- the med isn't sedating, is it?

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by Living in LaLa Land

Went to my new pdoc. He prescribed Clonidine for my insomnia, but I'm hesitant to take it because of reviews online. He also doubled my Trileptal dosage to stabilize me. So, I went from 600 mg total to 1200 mg. Hopefully, it'll work. I prefer to try the Trileptal, which puts me to sleep first before trying the Clonidine.

Any experience with the Clonidine?

Anyway, his first impression is good. He seems patient and willing to listen, not act as if he alone knows what's good for me like my previous pdoc. He even offer meditation and visualization as a tool to help me sleep. He doesn't believe in prescribing Benzos and when I said I didn't like antipsychotics (Tried two and that's enough for me), he didn't hassle me at all.

I see him next month, instead of the three months my previous pdoc would always put me on. Got my vitals done too. Something I never got at the old doc. The only thing is that I missed group, which I like. Oh well.

(I managed to go food shopping and go to Kohl's too. So I feel productive.)

EDIT: Should I jump from 600 mg a day to 1200 mg so fast? Or, should I jump to 900 to see how I am on it first?

I'm on 1200mg of Trileptal, I can't remember if I went from 600 or 900 to that dose though. What did your doctor say?

I've taken clonidine but for anxiety and had no issues with it

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by BethRags

I have to do laundry today and I'm anxious because I have 2 loads. Carrying the laundry basket is very heavy to carry to the laundry room and I have fear about my achilles hurting. And I tell myself, so what? Worse case I ask my husband to carry the laundry back up here (I live upstairs) when he comes over this evening.

The things I get myself wound up about

Then I do it, survive just fine, and tell myself, as I almost always do, that my anticipatory anxiety wasted hours and was not necessary, at all.

I bought a hamper that has wheels and I love not having to carry a basket.. I got mine at Target, I dunno if they still have them. I just did a quick search on Amazon they has tons ! Might help you

[~Christina]

Oh this weather is Glorious

I don't think I mentioned that we finally have hot water.. What a mess it was trying to convert from a standard tank to this small tankless unit that heats water as you are using it.. I don't leave it on, I turn it on of course when I go to take a shower, But I don't need hot water to wash my hands or rinse off dishes for the dishwater.. So we will save alot of money buying propane..

Otherwise I am sedated and for now its fine...

Hugs to anyone in need

[Sunflower123]

I slept for 8 full hours the night before last. It was wonderful!

I’ve mentioned that I have a high anxiety producing situation in my life right now. I’m just eaten up with anxiety over it. There is no escape from it. I hope it’s resolved soon because between the anxiety and panic attacks, I’m curled up in a little ball on the couch. Nothing is getting accomplished.

Anxiety is the pits!

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Oh this weather is Glorious

I don't think I mentioned that we finally have hot water.. What a mess it was trying to convert from a standard tank to this small tankless unit that heats water as you are using it.. I don't leave it on, I turn it on of course when I go to take a shower, But I don't need hot water to wash my hands or rinse off dishes for the dishwater.. So we will save alot of money buying propane..

Otherwise I am sedated and for now its fine...

Hugs to anyone in need

This weather is glorious! Glad you finally have hot water. That’s great!

Hugs.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I slept for 8 full hours the night before last. It was wonderful!

I’ve mentioned that I have a high anxiety producing situation in my life right now. I’m just eaten up with anxiety over it. There is no escape from it. I hope it’s resolved soon because between the anxiety and panic attacks, I’m curled up in a little ball on the couch. Nothing is getting accomplished.

Anxiety is the pits!

It sure is! I'm sorry you are having to go through that. I, myself, am holding my breath that my paperwork gets done and the inspection goes through. They didn't email me the link to the portal today. That makes me nervous. Yay for sleeping 8 full hours!

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Living in LaLa Land

Went to my new pdoc. He prescribed Clonidine for my insomnia, but I'm hesitant to take it because of reviews online. He also doubled my Trileptal dosage to stabilize me. So, I went from 600 mg total to 1200 mg. Hopefully, it'll work. I prefer to try the Trileptal, which puts me to sleep first before trying the Clonidine.

Any experience with the Clonidine?

Anyway, his first impression is good. He seems patient and willing to listen, not act as if he alone knows what's good for me like my previous pdoc. He even offer meditation and visualization as a tool to help me sleep. He doesn't believe in prescribing Benzos and when I said I didn't like antipsychotics (Tried two and that's enough for me), he didn't hassle me at all.

I see him next month, instead of the three months my previous pdoc would always put me on. Got my vitals done too. Something I never got at the old doc. The only thing is that I missed group, which I like. Oh well.

(I managed to go food shopping and go to Kohl's too. So I feel productive.)

EDIT: Should I jump from 600 mg a day to 1200 mg so fast? Or, should I jump to 900 to see how I am on it first?

I was not aware clonidine helped with sleep. Hope it works.

As far as the Trileptal, I would follow the doctor' advice.

Hugs!!

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I slept for 8 full hours the night before last. It was wonderful!

I’ve mentioned that I have a high anxiety producing situation in my life right now. I’m just eaten up with anxiety over it. There is no escape from it. I hope it’s resolved soon because between the anxiety and panic attacks, I’m curled up in a little ball on the couch. Nothing is getting accomplished.

Anxiety is the pits!

deep nreathing, meditation, prayer help me. Hugs!

[downersgoup]

I'm feeling okay today. Kind of feels like an upswing from depression at the moment, but not fully out yet. I'm trying to decide if I should switch from lamotrigine to lithium per the recommendation of my psych, but am feeling a bit exhausted with the constant tweaking of meds. I know it's just part of the process, but I would be remiss in saying that it wasn't annoying sometimes.

[wildflowerchild25]

Ok Ive had a chance to chill out. I was able to tell RS about my day and I feel so much better. I was never able to share my day with my late husband without judgement. I love him very much. Yesterday, we looked at engagement rings together and measured my ring size. I tried my hardest to get him to be ok with the ones I liked but he kept saying they’re too cheap lol I would never want him to spend a lot on a ring! Just enough so that it is quality so it will last a long time. My other engagement ring was less than $500 and was fine for the 7 years I wore it. Aquamarine and white gold. I do not want a diamond for political and capitalistic reasons. Anyway, he knows what I like now. He kind of felt bad because he wanted to do it stealthily like you’re “supposed” to but I explained to him he might end up getting me something I hate because he doesn’t know my style. I wear zero jewelry, he’s got nothing to go on! He didn’t know where I kept my old wedding set.

Anyway I’m just happy we’re moving forward. I told him I will not dictate how/when to propose

As I said, I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief when he said he wanted no more than 50 people at our wedding!!! I am actually going to have my dream wedding! My late husband controlled everything about our wedding. He invited practically everyone we knew, he made me get married in a church, he made me do the bouquet toss and garter removal (SO UNCOMFORTABLE). He even made me add two women to my bridal party to make it even! One I barely knew, and the other I couldn’t stand!

We will be able to get married in my dream venue (a botanical garden that is dear to my heart and has a beautiful old house to serve as the reception hall). And I will be able to cut out all the people I don’t want there by just saying we can only fit x people in the venue! And best of all the whole thing should be under 10k!

I am just very happy to finally have the life I wanted all along. No abuse, controlled mental illness, happy job, great father figure for my son...and in a few years we will even have a house of our own.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Ok Ive had a chance to chill out. I was able to tell RS about my day and I feel so much better. I was never able to share my day with my late husband without judgement. I love him very much. Yesterday, we looked at engagement rings together and measured my ring size. I tried my hardest to get him to be ok with the ones I liked but he kept saying they’re too cheap lol I would never want him to spend a lot on a ring! Just enough so that it is quality so it will last a long time. My other engagement ring was less than $500 and was fine for the 7 years I wore it. Aquamarine and white gold. I do not want a diamond for political and capitalistic reasons. Anyway, he knows what I like now. He kind of felt bad because he wanted to do it stealthily like you’re “supposed” to but I explained to him he might end up getting me something I hate because he doesn’t know my style. I wear zero jewelry, he’s got nothing to go on! He didn’t know where I kept my old wedding set.

Anyway I’m just happy we’re moving forward. I told him I will not dictate how/when to propose

As I said, I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief when he said he wanted no more than 50 people at our wedding!!! I am actually going to have my dream wedding! My late husband controlled everything about our wedding. He invited practically everyone we knew, he made me get married in a church, he made me do the bouquet toss and garter removal (SO UNCOMFORTABLE). He even made me add two women to my bridal party to make it even! One I barely knew, and the other I couldn’t stand!

We will be able to get married in my dream venue (a botanical garden that is dear to my heart and has a beautiful old house to serve as the reception hall). And I will be able to cut out all the people I don’t want there by just saying we can only fit x people in the venue! And best of all the whole thing should be under 10k!

I am just very happy to finally have the life I wanted all along. No abuse, controlled mental illness, happy job, great father figure for my son...and in a few years we will even have a house of our own.

Sounds like things are looking up!

[Moose72]

So today I called the new apartment complex to ask for the link to the online portal where you pay your rent, etc. and the lady said, "Oh, we got the paperwork. We are working on it right now". So of course my initial reaction was happiness! But now I'm beginning to think that they're not doing that at all. Why? Because she didn't send me the link to the portal! Shouldn't I be able to log in there soon? Aren't I going to have to pay the rent and deposit on the first? I want to know! Am I being unreasonable? Paranoid? Annoying? All I asked for was the link to the portal! I had it before but I lost it. Now I'm not even sure I remember the password I came up with for it! I have a guess and I hope I'm right.

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by downersgoup

I'm feeling okay today. Kind of feels like an upswing from depression at the moment, but not fully out yet. I'm trying to decide if I should switch from lamotrigine to lithium per the recommendation of my psych, but am feeling a bit exhausted with the constant tweaking of meds. I know it's just part of the process, but I would be remiss in saying that it wasn't annoying sometimes.

Starting lithium in 2008 likely saved my life, as it markedly improved my resistant depression. Traditional teaching about lithium was that it was mostly useful for the up pole. That was clearly an error. Recent studies in major depression have shown it as as effective as any traditional antidepressant.

I was on lamictal for yrs. It was useless for my depression

Hugs!!

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Ok Ive had a chance to chill out. I was able to tell RS about my day and I feel so much better. I was never able to share my day with my late husband without judgement. I love him very much. Yesterday, we looked at engagement rings together and measured my ring size. I tried my hardest to get him to be ok with the ones I liked but he kept saying they’re too cheap lol I would never want him to spend a lot on a ring! Just enough so that it is quality so it will last a long time. My other engagement ring was less than $500 and was fine for the 7 years I wore it. Aquamarine and white gold. I do not want a diamond for political and capitalistic reasons. Anyway, he knows what I like now. He kind of felt bad because he wanted to do it stealthily like you’re “supposed” to but I explained to him he might end up getting me something I hate because he doesn’t know my style. I wear zero jewelry, he’s got nothing to go on! He didn’t know where I kept my old wedding set.

Anyway I’m just happy we’re moving forward. I told him I will not dictate how/when to propose

As I said, I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief when he said he wanted no more than 50 people at our wedding!!! I am actually going to have my dream wedding! My late husband controlled everything about our wedding. He invited practically everyone we knew, he made me get married in a church, he made me do the bouquet toss and garter removal (SO UNCOMFORTABLE). He even made me add two women to my bridal party to make it even! One I barely knew, and the other I couldn’t stand!

We will be able to get married in my dream venue (a botanical garden that is dear to my heart and has a beautiful old house to serve as the reception hall). And I will be able to cut out all the people I don’t want there by just saying we can only fit x people in the venue! And best of all the whole thing should be under 10k!

I am just very happy to finally have the life I wanted all along. No abuse, controlled mental illness, happy job, great father figure for my son...and in a few years we will even have a house of our own.

What an exciting time for you!!! Just remember, the state may limit the size of your wedding due to Covid.

Hugs!!!

[bpcyclist]

Originally Posted by Moose72

So today I called the new apartment complex to ask for the link to the online portal where you pay your rent, etc. and the lady said, "Oh, we got the paperwork. We are working on it right now". So of course my initial reaction was happiness! But now I'm beginning to think that they're not doing that at all. Why? Because she didn't send me the link to the portal! Shouldn't I be able to log in there soon? Aren't I going to have to pay the rent and deposit on the first? I want to know! Am I being unreasonable? Paranoid? Annoying? All I asked for was the link to the portal! I had it before but I lost it. Now I'm not even sure I remember the password I came up with for it! I have a guess and I hope I'm right.

I just think you are excited, Moose. Just chill. Everything is going to be just fine...

[bizi]

@wildflowerchild25

I am so happy for you!
He sounds like a keeper.
I picked out my engagement ring...lol
If I have to wear it then I want to know that I love it!
bizi

[Moose72]

I just took two PRNs- 5 mg haldol (only had 10's) and 100 Seroquel. I hope this helps me. We will see how I feel in about 20 minutes.