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  #1  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 11:40 AM
FluffyDinosaur FluffyDinosaur is offline
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I'm dealing with a lot of anger as a result of everything that has happened this past year, and I don't know how to release it. Therapists keep suggesting things like buying some cheap plates to break, or sports, but that doesn't work because it's allowed. Trying to calm myself down through things like meditation is just counterproductive as well. I feel like I'd need to do something really violent to let the anger out, but obviously I don't want to do that, so... The best I can come up with is violent movies and music but that only goes so far.
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  #2  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 12:55 PM
*Beth* *Beth* is offline
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Writing out how you're feeling. I've written about anger and ended up ripping gashes in the page/s with my pen, I was so enraged. It's essential to write with your own hand, not to type.

Google "anger poems" - all sorts of interesting stuff comes up.

Throw rocks in a river.

Run, and with every step think about how enraged you are. Keep running, keep feeling angry, until you're exhausted.

Clean things. Nothing works like mopping a floor to feel angry feelings and let them work through.
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  #3  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 01:16 PM
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Punch a pillow?

Yell into a pillow?

Go yell at the top of a mountain?

Hard cardio workout?
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  #4  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 04:59 PM
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Throw chew toys? We do not have a pet but bought some chew toys a few weeks ago. This is not very satisfying though Good posts above.
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  #5  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 05:23 PM
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The smashing dishes suggestion seems silly. Not may people have a place where they could break plates without conquequences for someone.

What are you so angry about, Fluffy Dinosaur? I know for myself, who or what I'm angry at dictates how I realease or often-times difuse that anger.

You guys have left some really great suggestions, even if they're not helpful for the OP...I thank you, I'll be using some of these
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  #6  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 05:29 PM
Soupe du jour Soupe du jour is offline
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I like a lot of the suggestions. As for my personal best way to vent anger is to write, something BethRags mentioned. Of course that can be with a piece of paper and pen (rip it up, if necessary), but I think that even typing up a storm on the computer, can be really good. I consider that funneling frustration from my brain through my fingers and onto the keyboard. The key is to write for yourself. You can always keep it, later delete it, or send it to someone. My advice on sending it to someone, though, is to always wait at least an hour or even a day before pressing "Send", but sometimes the venting alone is far good enough. Sending it out by text, email, or snail mail can be easily regretted soon after.
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  #7  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 06:41 PM
*Beth* *Beth* is offline
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btw, a zillion years ago I read a book, an old book on psychoanalysis, that stated that anger is the flip-side of depression.

I've never forgotten it. Sometimes when I feel depressed I come to find that I'm actually angry. When I release the anger, the depression shifts.
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  #8  
Old Dec 21, 2020, 11:01 PM
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Health Warrior Health Warrior is offline
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Hi, I experience anger/depression as well, due to suppressing my emotions for years. I’ve also experienced some major downfalls in my life but a positive way to release these pent up frustration is to write a dialogue with the people who have angered you somewhat as if you’re the Director of a Play. Rewriting the events into a positive outcome. Hope this little input helps in some way.
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  #9  
Old Dec 22, 2020, 07:34 AM
FluffyDinosaur FluffyDinosaur is offline
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Thanks for all the suggestions. I'm not sure there's anything non-violent that really works. Writing is something I normally like to do but it's hard to find the concentration and energy for it now.

As for the reasons for my anger, I don't want to give away so much that people can identify me. Long story short, there have been multiple breaches of trust from mental health institutions that were supposed to help me. At this point I'm sorry I ever asked for help in the first place, because they've only caused more damage.
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  #10  
Old Dec 22, 2020, 12:15 PM
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I'm so sorry that happened to you, Fluffy Dinosaur. In situations like that I get caught up in a feeling of powerlessness and ruminate on the situation for month - MONTHS! It turns into a a constant companion of sickening depression and hopelessness, and I do not recommend.

I can fully appreciate why you'd feel the need for a violent expression of anger to feel satisfied - but yeah anything "not allowed" is not going to have a good outcome.

I think for me, the only thing that can work- because writing about a situation in which I am powerless like that ...a situation in which I've asked help from those whose job it is to help me and I've been f**ked over in response- only leads to more rumination and frustration- Is to strongly state to myself: " Thank goodness I'm not the sort of person who would respond to a person in need by screwing them over" at least I have that, and integrety is a lot. Thank ***** I have kindness and integrity, unlike those who wronged me. It gives me back my power.

I hope that is helpful. I'm sorry, I know I have terrible writing skills, but I hope it made sense.
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  #11  
Old Dec 22, 2020, 02:31 PM
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Or....you could just countersink a bunch of nails in a a pristine unmarred wall in your home - to hell with locating the studs. Make a real mess, even if you run out of nails - carefull not to create large holes, and then cover the damage with a lovely framed print

I don't really recommend this, you've fu**ed up something of your own, and the bastards have won.
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  #12  
Old Dec 23, 2020, 05:02 AM
FluffyDinosaur FluffyDinosaur is offline
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Yes, I also tend to ruminate on this stuff for a very long time (another kind of "stuck thinking" I guess, like that thread BethRags had a while back). And it has happened multiple times throughout the year, so I've pretty much been ruminating all year. It's exhausting. Beating the crap out of my house is pretty much exactly what I want to do. I probably would have if I were living alone. Trying not to let the bastards win is good advice. I try to tell myself they're being punished enough just by being the bastards they are.
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  #13  
Old Dec 23, 2020, 08:46 AM
RockyRoad007 RockyRoad007 is offline
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I used to live 10 miles outside of town in a rural location. More than once, on the way into town, I would take advantage of the drive to let intense feelings out by screaming, yelling, and roaring. All at the top of my lungs. Unbelievably loud. I'm a woman, and fully capable of doing an incredible roar.

And no pillows required. And no holding back.

My voice may have been hoarse afterwards, but the release was worth it.

Could even be done in moving traffic. Who's going to hear you with all the traffic noise?
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  #14  
Old Dec 23, 2020, 05:30 PM
*Beth* *Beth* is offline
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Good idea! I had forgotten about screaming, shouting, howling, and singing vicious songs while driving! I used to do that regularly and it is quite effective for releasing anger.
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  #15  
Old Dec 24, 2020, 02:50 AM
FluffyDinosaur FluffyDinosaur is offline
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Yes, that is a good one indeed. I do that mostly in the form of listening to loud music while driving. Only thing is to watch out that I don't start driving aggressively, but other than that it's great.
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  #16  
Old Dec 27, 2020, 10:39 AM
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Werewoman Werewoman is offline
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Well, I'm not sure if this will help, but I like to shoot. A lot. Mostly trapshooting, but I go to the range twice a week. Idk, something about blowing small groups of holes in paper targets...very relaxing and I feel good about my training and abilities.

I have also found mindful meditation to be very helpful and it improves my focus as well.
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  #17  
Old Dec 28, 2020, 01:42 PM
FluffyDinosaur FluffyDinosaur is offline
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Yeah, I used to go shooting as well. I kind of stopped doing it this year because I didn't have the energy but sometimes I still think it would be satisfying to go shoot something.
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