Bipolar check-in #59

I just got a call from the hospital. They said the surgery is at 1:39. Lol how random. But that I need to be at the hospital at 12:15. I have to stop eating at midnight and I have to stop drinking clear Liquids at 7. I can take my Valium though thankfully. I was worried about being without it. It’s gonna suck though not being able to go without eating for so long. We were going to pickup chinese food for dinner and I’ve heard that Chinese food makes you hungry like an hour after you finish eating. So I was gonna have some for dinner and then eat some around 10. My mom says that’s an old wives tale about Chinese food making you hungry right away. But my mom will be able to be with me immediately after the surgery. With other surgeries I was by myself for the first hour or 2 after.

But yeah now things are really starting to happen. I have to take a shower and wash my sheets and do some other stuff in a bit.

The hot water pump in my apartment complex (the whole complex of 26 apartments!) broke so we've had no hot water for 2 days so far. The pump won't arrive for at least 2 more days. I took an ice-cold shower this chilly morning; on the positive side it was invigorating! I'm pretty sure it's not legal for tenants to be without hot water for more than 24 hours. It would be nice if they knocked at least $25 off my rent. Dream on.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed I just got a call from the hospital. They said the surgery is at 1:39. Lol how random. But that I need to be at the hospital at 12:15. I have to stop eating at midnight and I have to stop drinking clear Liquids at 7. I can take my Valium though thankfully. I was worried about being without it. It’s gonna suck though not being able to go without eating for so long. We were going to pickup chinese food for dinner and I’ve heard that Chinese food makes you hungry like an hour after you finish eating. My mom says that’s an old wives tale. But my mom will be able to be with me immediately after the surgery. With other surgeries I was by myself for the first hour or 2 after. But yeah now things are really starting to happen. I have to take a shower and wash my sheets and do some other stuff in a bit.

How exciting! Except for the eating part. That's a long stretch with no food. But you'll make it. Some people say that occasional fasting is healthy.

Why would anyone block you? You are one of the most helpful and active members on this site.

My mom just helped me fold my laundry. Such a nice mom.

I'm pretty sure someone is stalking me.

Cold showers. Yuck. You can't rinse the soap/shampoo out very well.

Well I got home Monday from IP.

Obviously I was Detoxed via Phenebarbatol off Xanax. Was started on Seroquel and Geodon.

I saw Richard yesterday, he was very happy to see me. I am dealing with a exhaustion that I don't think I have ever had. The saying " weak as a kitten" I never understood until now. I know some is medication and I hope that starts to level out but he said that he expects it to last weeks and weeks and weeks. Hopefully it wont but he wanted to make sure I understood so I don't beat myself up. I am up for a few hours and honestly not doing anything and I have to go back to bed for a nap. Feels odd to be actually sleeping so much.

So for right now I am just focusing on taking care of myself. I'm having alot of runs of huge anxiety and Tachyacardia even on meds. Having to pull out loads of coping skills. My Blood sugar has increased due to meds already not thrilled about that. I have appt with GP on the 12th so might need a med increase to help drop my numbers.

Hugs to anyone in need

Beth so sorry to hear your dealing with no Hotwater Amanda went 4 days with no AC when the AC unit died in her apartment in Florida heat last week! I am hoping they give her a bit of a break on rent, its a private own and they are really great people so???

Ill send you my hot water I have zero use for it..

Now my rent is wrong on my statement. I've contacted my case manager for section 8 and the person in the rental office who works with these things- I had to leave the latter a voicemail.

I haven’t really felt any UTI stuff since I got my phone call. So maybe the pain really was fused by anxiety. Treatment resistant pain is always a bit suspicious for me. We got Chinese food for dinner but it wasn’t very good. We’re still figuring things out and what are good places and what aren’t. I’m doing laundry now. My pajamas and my sheet that I’m going to put on my bed. Then I’ll take a shower after that load is done. I have my 2 blankets I’ll be using in the washer right now. I can’t use my weighted blankets since they want you to sleep on clean sheets and my weighted blankets can’t be washed. I have a hunk of dried chocolate on one of my weighted blankets. Which is why I’m putting the sheet on the bed. Maybe I should just take the weighted blankets off my bed entirely and fold them and put them away since i probably won’t be able to use them at all for a long time.

I had to take my meds properly tonight so I took just the 100 mil Geodon tonight. I did take a 20 this morning when I should have taken an 80. So I’m a bit low today. But Tomorrow I’ll have to take the 80mil in the morning. Ill just have to do this temporarily. I don’t want 200 mil of Geodon in my system and have it cause issues. I’m contemplating whether to take a melatonin tonight or not. I told the nurse on the phone I take it every night and she didn’t say not to. But if I could get away without taking it I’d like that.

My mind is just going nonstop I’m trying to shut it down.

I'm watching a movie with captain Picard and captain Kirk in it. Captain kirk died. Now it changed to a new movie: Star Trek: First Contact.

The apartment complex guy called me back and it's correct what I have so no problem now! (OMG. After all this insanity of mine, did something actually go right???)

Whew getting ready for the wine tasting is exhausting. Since it’s mum’s house I have to clean it as if royalty is coming. All that’s left is the family room and the bathroom. I’ll do those tomorrow. I’ve had to take a shower everyday from cleaning, not that the house is dirty, it’s very clean but because people are coming I’ve got to move all the furniture and vacuum everywhere and dust everywhere, it’s like spring cleaning. Mum is neurotic that way and the only way to keep her calm about company is to spring clean an already clean house from top to bottom!

My blind tasting kit came yesterday. I was a bit worried it might not come in time, but it did. I don’t understand the questions but my daughter said she and her cousin will walk us all though it. I know nothing about wine and this whole party started as a joke. But my daughter urged me to do it. We all need a break from the isolation. It’s multi-generational and just family. There will be 8 of us. A perfect size for a wine tasting. I bough pretty disposable glasses for spittoons. Everyone will have their own instead of one shared one. Everyone has had two shots and the elders three so it should be safe between us.

I’m starting to look forward to it. I’ll have fancy olives, harvarti and aged white cheddar cheeses, water crackers and stone ground crackers, a fruit platter, not exactly sure which meats, depends on which are available. For non drinkers there’s spring water, three flavors of sparkling water, sparkling grape juice and coffee. I’m thinking of getting a cheese cake for after so there’s something a bit more filling before they drive even though I have the spittoons.

I’ve been wondering how your doing.

Where is my invite to this party? You had me at cheese. LOL

Honestly though it sounds like a lot of work, but I think you will reap the reward of an awesome event. I hope it all goes well!

Have fun! I don’t drink often but once in awhile I like to have a glass of wine in the evening. I actually am planning on getting some this Sunday.
Havarti cheese is my absolute favorite, I could eat that by the block

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Enjoy your comfort food! If it were me-- I'd round out the good food with a nice light hearted sitcom (probably something older, like the golden girls haha) and maybe a friend or family member. I to this day still do something similar. My mom likes AFV and so from time to time before bed we'll sit and watch it together. Laughter is always the best medicine!

I take omeprazole for GERD. Oddly, I don't need it everyday. I do take it everyday because it's what you're supposed to do, but I find periods where i can go a few days without issue. I hope your famotidine works well for you!

I just found out while I was in the shower that my insurance does cover my new therapist. Well 40% of her. But at least it’s being covered. Some therapists in my area are $300 without insurance. I’ll be paying $60 a session. $20 more then my last one but hopefully I’ll get better therapy and the extra $20 will be worth it. Plus she has openings and in person too unlike the one I was on the waiting list for and she seems to work in the areas I need help in. If I can go to every other week my therapy bill will be very manageable.

Thank you! And that’s a good idea laughing is great, I haven’t watched anything funny in awhile. I’ve heard good things about omeprazole. But my doctor wanted to try the famotidine first because it doesn’t have the risk of messing up magnesium levels I think? Apparently that’s a rare side effect but can happen. I can always try omeprazole if this doesn’t work but I’m hopeful that it does! I used to be on ranitidine but it was recalled because of the chemicals in it found that could cause or be linked to certain forms of cancer. It’s weird, I went a few years without a GERD flare up but then this past 3-4 months it’s been constant and terrible.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Today has been a bit eventful for me. I haven’t been walking in about a week and a half, and I really should enjoy this weather while it lasts. Maybe tomorrow I’ll make it out to do that. My medicine-induced uneasiness (I really don’t know how to put it otherwise) was less bad today. I felt a bit more irritable, but I managed to not nap today. Perhaps as time passes it will be easier to tolerate. Here is to hoping! I know it may seem silly to both complain and NOT change the medicine, but nothing has ever worked for me – at least not like this. I’ll accept a little rain with my sunshine so to speak. If it means I can enjoy the majority of my day feeling good, so be it. I don’t wanna do trial-and-error to see if something else can do it without that effect. I guess I just feel better if I complain about it here. Haha!

I finally got that call I’ve been waiting for. Long story short – the district manager is gonna have a talk with the employees. She even pulled the call. Apparently the regional manager was supposed to follow up with me but never did, so she was annoyed by that. It may be just an attempt to make me feel heard and complacent, but she gave me her cell phone number and told me because she values my loyalty to their pharmacy, that since my biggest issue is not wanting to having to deal with those I had issues with, I can text her and she will give me a heads up of when would be best to come to get my meds. While I doubt I’ll go through that trouble, it was nice she offered me that. I’m glad to at least be validated that they were unprofessional and it will be addressed. I made it clear, I didn’t appreciate being berated for being an advocate for myself and my medicine. She wholeheartedly agreed. It only took “48 hours” and three weeks of bull to get a response. At least I can say it was addressed and put it behind me as best I can. I won’t pretend I’m not upset, but I think if they want my business, it is the least they can do to help me ensure I don’t have to deal with that person, who she named for me since the pharmacist wouldn’t. To be fair, it’s been fairly easy to circumvent that, I just ask to speak to the pharmacist (I’ve lucked out and it’s not been the one I had the issue with) to check me out (to avoid the tech who I don’t know which one it is). I’ll probably just continue to do that. She said their business model is changing anyway and they want the pharmacist to be more present with customers anyway.

Nothing exciting is planned to happen for awhile. I don’t have therapy for another month and psychiatrist visits are just check-ins right now. I am more stable than I have ever been so I’m really just resigning myself to gratitude something is working. I have moments (especially in my “uneasiness” moments) where I really take some hard looks at my life and where things are. I need to make changes. At least I am at a point where I feel like I can work forward, and not be stuck by my own mental functioning. The meds help. I have to remember that for the future. (I haven’t had the best luck with meds, and usually end up not taking them.. but I feel this time will be different).
I’m finding interests again, I’m enjoying engaging conversation online, or even with myself (I admit it. I talk to myself haha). It’s been refreshing.

Well, that’s all I got to report. I appreciate everyone who takes time to read my bull. I think I’ve mentioned in the past I’ve had issues with forums and people. While I’ve still got my reservations about what I post, how, or why… I’ve at least had some precautions that have helped. Thanks everyone for making me feel at least welcome to be here, instead of going against the grain, so to speak.

We got our booster shots today. It makes me feel safer. I also took mom to surgery pre-testing.

Despite my best efforts at self care, I have a massive case of burnout. Mom doesn’t want part time care coming in and I’m at my wit’s end. I’m not sure what the answer is but I can’t effectively continue to care for them both without some outside help.

I just talked to my daughter for over an hour. We’re building that house one brick at a time. Hopefully, we have a beautiful structure before too long.

I hope everyone has a peaceful evening.

October is upon us. I spent pretty much the entire summer morbidly depressed, & now the season is changing. It's odd how this disorder can make one lose track of time so readily.

Hey! Buddha. Hope the depression is lifting. Glad to see you here it’s been too long.

Thanks, Nammu. The depression has pretty much cleared up. I'm on a max dose of AP (Vraylar) & a moderate dose of AD (Trintellix). It's hard to judge whether it's the meds, or just a mood change, though.