Bipolar check-in #68

I'm wondering if the Lamictal has suddenly stopped working. I can't stop crying. Med dude says I'm at "ceiling dose" with the Lamictal, but he's young and not experienced. I've had pdocs prescribe up to 300mg Lamictal. It's so hard because they get insulted if you tell them about something a different doctor did.

I'll take extra Lamictal over the week-end, though, and see if it jolts something. At this point I'm beyond crisis line. Supposedly the county has opened a place where someone can drop in and talk to a therapist and even get help with medication, if necessary. But this county is absurdly huge and the drop-in place is 25 miles away, the only way there being a wind-ey river road that cars crash on practically every day. And me with my gas tank almost on empty. I think the place closes at 9. Oh, well, I'll google and see if I can find out about it. Maybe in light of the gas price they'll do something.

Okay, yeah, they close at 9 p.m. 7 days/week, though. That's pretty good.

Well, I'll take 250mg Lamictal tonight. The foolish thing was taking so much kpin last night. I had forgotten how it screws up mood.

I think at this point the drop in place sounds like a good idea.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Moose72 I think at this point the drop in place sounds like a good idea.

It does, but they close in 40 mins. I wouldn't be able to get there in time. Why there isn't a place like that in this town is anybody's guess.

Thank you, Moose

Beth

My guests are finally leaving. We ran out of money for gas haven't seen miguel in 2 or more weeks. We see him tomorrow. I'm so excited.

@*Beth* I'm sorry to read how unwell you feel. It is a shame when one feels they can't get higher level mental health care because of obligations like work or on your case, pets. As for pets, I've heard of "pet sitters" that are part of a formal group and may even have references. Perhaps you may want to look into that. Not sure if any of their pet sitters would have experience with a diabetic cat, but maybe you could have your four healthier kitties stay at home for a pet sitter coming in, and your diabetic kitty boarded at a vet's office? The latter would likely be more expensive, but you are worth it. Pet sitters need only come in once per day to look in on them and change their food and litter. The beauty of healthy cats is that they are much lower maintenance than dogs or parrots.

Another month, another financial pickle. Quite a pickle this one is. I committed to a bug spray regimen for the house a couple of weeks ago, because I was certain I was going to be employed by this point. Not a bad deal: $60 for the first month and $40 for every month after with visits every three months. I got the company to push the payment back to the end of the month because... well, expected employment. If I can't pay up, I'm due for $300 in cancellation fees.

Another unpleasant surprise: the water got shut off end of the day yesterday. At least, that's when I noticed it. So, I get to go the weekend at least without a shower. The water and utilities were one of the bills the family was helping out with, so I'm at a loss as to what happened! Well, Monday will include a trip to City Hall. Good news: If this becomes a drawn out affair, I have a place to go take a shower and/or do laundry. Bad news: It's my cousin's place. He's gonna love that.

Positive note: Electric and internet are still up and running and current. I won't have to worry about them ending over the next month. So, there's that!

It's a relief that Hubby went for a weekend trip with his friend who came to stay in the area for a month. It just raced by, mostly because of the covid we had. The friend soon heads to Estonia for a month. I'm relieved not because he's leaving, but because we have so many things on our plate coming up.

Next Wednesday is a contract signing for the property we wish to buy. Hubby is going through it with a fine toothed comb and making changes to the doc (he luckily has a degree in law). If all goes well, we provide the deposit on that day. One step closer to possible ownership of the whole property. I won't write much more right now because lots of ideas are racing through both of our minds.

My nephew left the psych hospital last night. I don't know what to think about that. I'm far enough removed that I suppose I should just contact him saying "Hello" and leave it at that, right now.

@*Beth* I’m sorry you are having such a tough time. I’m concerned about you and your well-being. Please be safe. Sending hugs, healing vibes and prayers.

I had a busy week and was fatigued yesterday so I took the day completely off to rest. A good book, cable, soft blanket, soft bamboo socks, tangerine tea, a lilac candle and a large vase of sunflowers and crepe myrtle picked the day before. Delightful. I may repeat today. It’s a rainy, overcast day. Perfect for nesting and resting.

Summer is rolling right along. Hard to believe it is almost August. I’ve been feeling somewhat depressed. Each time, I take an extra Vraylar and feel better in hours. I may ask my med provider to increase it going forward.

Hugs to all that need them.

I’m on a few medications that take away my appetite and I’ve learnt that I have to eat anyway because I was getting pretty sick when I wasn’t eating. Zero energy, low blood sugar, headaches, muscle weakness that made it hard to walk or pick things up. literally feeling like I was going to die and then the mood changes on top of that. To be healthy and keep your mind and body going you need to eat whether you have an appetite or not. And for weight loss the less you eat eventually the less you lose.

Then go Saturday.

The sleep study went ok. I fell asleep at 6:30. I woke up once at 8:30 for some reason but got back to sleep immediatly. Then at 9 something I woke up in the middle of a Lady A song because I was spooked by all the wires and the oxygen thing. For some reason the first thought I had was "something suddenly came up" from The Brady Bunch. I got back to sleep around 10:30 and then slept until 5:15. I know I woke up a few times but then fell back asleep immediatly but I am pretty sure they have enough info. I'm not sure what the results will be to be honest.

Anyways I ordered a couple pairs of similar jeans from Hollister. They were on sale and I had a 20% coupon and a $5 reward. So I'll take the Old Navy ones back.

I feel fine today. Tired from last night since I didn't sleep as good as I have been but my moods and anxiety are still fine. My mom asked me this morning if I wanted to see my pdoc in person in September. Which means going out of state and staying in a hotel. I did really want to see him in person but I didn't want to bring it up because we are already going on vacation in the middle of August. But if she is suggesting it then I'm totally on board.

The pharmacy is filling my valium now without an issue. I'm glad I had no issues getting by without my normal dose for a couple days but I was starting to feel things a little bit with just 1.5 mil. Just some physical side effects I think are withdrawels. They don't normally have an issue filling it 2 days early. I may try to stick to 2 a day instead of 3 though.

Much love to YOU dear Beth

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Originally Posted by Nammu @Beth n Yeah I think wildflower is ip Ouch, my arms are so sore. I had my second shingles shot in one arm and a pneumonia shot in the other. After that I had to submit to the mammogram machine. Then last night I tried the edible gummy’s again. This time two of them, I was slightly buzzed but it didn’t help with sleep. I’ll give it another try maybe next week? I think if I try 3 times I can say I gave it the old college try. The insurance refused to cover the 1.75 mg of ambien and it was over $150 dollars for 14 pills. So I’m going from 2.5 to nothing starting Sunday night. But so far I haven’t had any physical withdrawals like I did when I tried myself to go off. So I’m hopeful. Sending calming peaceful vibes to everyone here. ✨

Thank you for the vibes ~*~

I'm so sorry about your sleep. What a misery.
Insurance...I won't even get started...

I didn't have a single reaction from the covid vax, but I sure did from the shingles vaccine! Had a fever and felt like I had the flu, felt super sleepy. Fortunately, the side-effects lasted only 1/2 a day, maybe a bit longer.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom My guests are finally leaving. We ran out of money for gas haven't seen miguel in 2 or more weeks. We see him tomorrow. I'm so excited.

They're finally leaving!!! Wohoo!

I would definitely (and gladly) make the journey to the mental health drop-in clinic, but my car is at an 1/8 of a tank of gas, gas is just under $6. It would cost me minimum $24 to make it on gas. And I have enough quarters to do laundry, that's all I have.

The GREAT news is that I took 250mg of Lamictal last night (I'm prescribed 200mg) and woke up feeling like a functional human being. I'm not crying, I feel that "more objective" feeling that comes when med is doing it's job.

I will take the same dose tonight and see if the improvement continues and call the clinic Monday morning. The challenge will be to convince med due that the increased dose is necessary, as he's convinced that 200mg is tops. But I have been on 300 mg before. He is a reasonable person, though, so hopefully he'll be flexible. However, I'm guessing that he's going to suggest adding in either Depakote or lithium, neither of which I'm thrilled about.

Ugh. This has been a bad one.

As for hiring someone to care for the cats, there are vet techs who are familiar with feline diabetes and who will come to a home. The major issue is $$$$$. It's just plain not available. I can't afford gas, let alone a cat sitter, which sounds to me at this point like a rock star dream.

So x fingers crossed x that the Lamictal does the trick.

Much love all around and hopes for a super Saturday for all of us!

And thanks to each of you for the friendship and support! Wow, does that help.

I have a job offer! It's the 30-ish hour job, but set in a different city. The interviewer says she can promise more hours there! Luckily, it's about the same drive to the new city.

I get onboarding stuff in on Monday!

@Aurelius710 congratulations 🎊🎈🍾🎉

Congrats on the new job, Aurelius, you'll do great!

Been feeling pretty good lately. But today I'm just feeling bad towards my job and my relationship and just wanting to lay in bed. I felt great this morning. Just came on all of a sudden a few hours ago.

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Beth !!! Are you feeling any better ???! I’m very worried about you. I understand that distraught feeling. Catch me on Facebook anytime !

Soupe so you found a place you like ?? That’s great ! Sure moving is stressful but at least it will be your home !

Jennifer… you Amaze me with your goal of finding what you need to fill your days.

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It’s still raining a but we just hit what my Dad always called a “ Gully washer” almost 40 mins of heavy rain. We are under a Flood watch . We live on a ridge so no way will we flood. The temp dropped over 20 degree! Feels amazing. We have steady rain over the next 4-5 hours !! My internet is cutting and out and that’s just fine !

Well a contact person called me about the Voc Rehab. It’s a unbelievable process. I have a case worker that I need to talk to next Thursday. But.. They are sending me medical release forms. She said it takes 45 -90 day to get medical records and verify I truly fit there criteria to help honestly I think I just need to get a job on my own I simple can’t wait that long nor do I want to jump through 117 hoops. I’m going to talk to Richard on Wednesday then this case worker Thursday. I think it’s just going to be a waste of my time. Maybe that case worker will tell me how we will explain away years of my not working.

PSA… People check with your insurance. My Pharmacy said they can file to get 1-2 Covid tests a month for me.

Better hit send before my internet cuts out again !

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Yes I got four boxes of home
Covid tests for free with my insurance! Ask about it!