Bipolar Check-in #87

I started dissociating this evening and ended up trying something my therapist suggested which was dipping my face into a big ice cold bowl of water and holding my breath under in it for a few seconds. I did like 4 rounds of 10-15 seconds each with a break between each round. It seemed to help, it was really cold and shocking but in a good way

the dive reflex skills is a good one. glad it helped you!

kentucky ohio valley allergies are in full swing. im gonna have to start taking allergy meds again. ugh. at least its int he 50s here!

I am feeling a ton better. I got up and washed my 2 blankets I've been living in for the last 2 days. Then I took a shower for the first time in a week. I was just worried about some stuff which is why I didn't shower before tonight. We got Mcdonalds for dinner and I got a happy meal. Not for the toy. Just to keep to my weight loss goal. I ordered some things from Old Navy I needed. Not wanted. I saved $22. And saved more money by choosing store pickup. Not really sure what was up these couple days.

Today was a little bit of a self care day. I talked with my mentor (who I haven't talk with in ages), went to confession for the first time in awhile, got a nice walk in, and read a little. I also grocery shopped, got some laundry put away, and had a nice video chat with my godsons.

Not much on my plate tomorrow-Mass, clean my bathroom, and maybe a walk. Only a few more weeks until spring break!

Mood wise, I'm feeling stable and happy. It's quite nice.

Drinking a nice cup of orange cinnamon tea whilst my washing is in the machine

It’s 5 am. I’m up. Gonna be a long day. Church choir rehearsal, then the service, then extra small-choir rehearsals after. Then N3 and I are going to an Irish pub for fish and chips. My friend invited me to go for coffee but I said it would have to be after I get home. We haven’t seen each other in a while.

Another one up at 5 AM. Gonna do pilates, shower, read, then I have a grocery curbside pickup...right when rain is predicted. Why does it ALWAYS rain when I do curbside pickup?!

Up early on Sunday not going to church bc I have a busy day ahead. Sadly. But I did get some good sleep. Gonna make some coffee and work on an essay due Tuesday

I slept from 11:30 until 8. I was having a good dream where someone was about to get yelled at real good for acting like they were me on a call, but then I dropped my phone on my floor and that woke me up. Kinda disapointed I didn't get to see more of this dream.

I feel fine today. I did 200 reps with my ab roller and I'll do more. I'm trying to get my room cleaned up again. I think I'll wash my comforter.

So theres not much going on today. But I feel good.

I meet with my therapist on Thursday but I had to reschedule so she said how about Tuesday. I told her I had something that day and we could always just skip the week if it was too difficult. But we worked out a time on Friday.

MSF seems to not be freezing up on me today (knock on wood!). It's so annoying to lose posts again and again.

Sorry for those of you suffering with allergies. I'm right there with you, and Claritin makes my anxiety bad while hydroxyzine does nothing but make me a tad drowsy. Mostly I have itchy eyes. I got some antihistamine eye drops with my grocery order this morning, and I think they are helping.

I've had a pretty busy morning. Did my usual and had grocery pickup, also some time with H I drew 3 pictures that mostly turned out. I couldn't get the broken egg quite realistic as the book used white gouche paint for the top to really emphasize the white, and I didn't have that. But it didn't turn out that badly either.

Oo blueberry I think your eggshell came out very nice.

I got up at noon. Another tossed and turned night. Not sure when I fell asleep. Dreams of working for a halfway place that was a resort in a previous life. Had boats to get to and from the grocery stores.

Hey everyone

Sleep was awful. Been awake since 2:40am. Yikes 😟

Fortunately it will be a good day at work for me today. I teach one class in the morning and on in the afternoon. In between I will be grading papers. Reports are due on Friday but I’m good I’ve finished most of them. They’re just interim reports so nothing major

Hello, just woke up from a nap. Trying to get as much sleep as I can as I’m staying up all night tonight cause I have something I have to do tomorrow morning early and I can’t miss it and don’t trust myself to hear my alarms. I also have therapy tomorrow afternoon in addition to that.

I played some of my videogame today. Probably gonna play more of it later tonight. Other than that I took a walk earlier today. It’s really cold but sunny.

Probably gonna work on a Minnie Mouse drawing later too. I have the whole rest of the afternoon and all night long ahead of me so I have a lot of time to do whatever I want to do. Probably read, play games, and draw and watch shows.

Did my med containers, one for am, one for pm. And did my daily drawing. Today it was a hot air balloon and a simple contour drawing of a bird from how to draw cool stuff. It was about lines.

Been doing much better at taking my eye drops too. I recently bought a new bottle of eye drops and they seem to release only one drop at a time. The control is much better so I’ve been using them much more often like my eye drops wants me to do.

@Blue_Bird - I'm sorry you feel the need to pull all-nighters. You already have a lot of sleep difficulties, so I'm not sure why make things worse by pulling all-nighters? And even if I've had a good 2 hr nap in the day, that doesn't mean I'm good to go for an all-nighter. Absolutely not. I'm sure you know that is completely not helpful to bipolar and anxiety. Why not schedule your appointments later in the day to avoid this? Any time I try an all nighter I gear myself up for several nights of poor sleep and even mania. I really hope you maybe can call and reschedule your appt. Will you not get up for the phone alarm even if you have it across your room and have to physically get out of bed to shut it off? If you can't trust an alarm, I would say just nix all early appts.

I took a 2 hr nap (allergies are exhausting me), and now I have zucchini bread baking in the oven. Internet recipe so fingers crossed for a good result. I'd like to use my mom's recipe but it makes 2 loaves, and that's too much since only H and I will eat it, my daughter doesn't care for it. But my mom's recipe is not helpful for halving or anything as it uses an odd number of eggs (3 maybe?), which makes things tricky.

@Nammu - How are you liking the 15 minute drawing book?

Loving it, it’s my favorite out of all her books. Used the draw cool stuff workbook today. I want to get the nature book but got to wait a bit as I spent enough on books recently. I have 5 drawing books now. Need to keep up with the drawing everyday. I know she says to draw large but I’m still using the 3x6 book. I’ve got a larger sketchbook but it is intimidating.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu Loving it, it’s my favorite out of all her books. Used the draw cool stuff workbook today. I want to get the nature book but got to wait a bit as I spent enough on books recently. I have 5 drawing books now. Need to keep up with the drawing everyday. I know she says to draw large but I’m still using the 3x6 book. I’ve got a larger sketchbook but it is intimidating.

Her 5 minute drawing book is worth it too. Just a few pics in that I found too simplistic to do. In the nature one, she uses oil pastels a couple of times. I did the first pastel pic with colored pencils (a kingfisher bird) & it came out gorgeous even then. I'm too intimidated to try oil pastels with the 2nd pic (a jellyfish). The end of the nature book is more scenery, I'm not as much into that. And I've still got to re-try the alligator; my first attempt was a disaster!

Not sure how you get by on a 3x6 sketchbook...Lately I have been using 9x12 sketchbooks.

The thing is it’s the food pantry and I really need to go and they’re only open 3 days a week at a specific time and you need to be there by like 7:30am if you want a spot. I’m scared I’ll sleep through my alarm even if it is on the other side of my room. My anxiety about not waking up on time will probably keep me up regardless

Im like that - if i have a morning appointment, i cant sleep that night to save my life. It just messes me up.

Yes me too. Ironically taking 20 mg of ambien insures I sleep well and wake up early. Otherwise I’m tossing and turning all night. So like for tomorrow when I’m going to my daughter’s, she’s a morning person, I take the extra 5 to sleep good. You’d think that a sleeping med would make you groggy but it never does. I just sleep better and wake refreshed.

The past couple of days have been wonderful. It's been literally 70 degrees on the dot since Thursday and I have been out enjoying all of it. I have been going to the gym regularly, going to Adoration, going to my meetings and yesterday was the icing on the cake with my Raleigh Sci_fi Geeks group from Meetup.com - there were two events - one was the Monster Mash Coffee Talk where we had a huge table at Starbucks and discussed movie monsters and one guy mentioned he just started watching Star Trek the Next Generation and it was totally up my ally! I told him all the best episodes and things about the show that not a lot of people know.

Then it was off to the Space Museum. What a fun time! I also think I am going to Galaxy Con again this year, I think it will be well worth it. I also made a friend at the Meetup group, I hope she adds me as friend. I should have gotten her number, but I didn't want to be creepy. We had a really good time going through the exhibit together, we were the only girls in the group, so I think we just naturally flocked together, lol.

All in all, it's been a really good weekend. My friend came out of jail and is in an Oxford House - I feel really bad for her, she has had worse luck than me this past year - we were really good friends at one point, but all my craziness happened so we drifted. Good news is she is safe, and I am going to be helping her out and seeing her more. I also got SIX count them, SIX emails from the ex yesterday, so you know I was flying high, lol.

Mass was really good too. This is the first week the priest will be saying a special prayer for me at mass where I have to come up to the altar and prayed on. So far, it's been an amazing experience. Sleep has been pretty good too despite some CPAP issues.

Here are some cool pics from the Space Museum - hope everyone had a great weekend!

Oh it’s great to hear you sounding like yourself again shadow lady! Huzzah!