Bipolar Check-in #87

I must confess… I haven’t been on the check in thread for months because I don’t want to read about politics! So far this new thread is politics free but my anxiety goes through the roof when people start talking politics. That’s why I’ve started my own thread about my stuff.

My eldest son messaged me. Picking him up now and we’re going for lunch. So excited. Haven’t seen him for a few weeks!

I’ve been laying in bed all day feeling depressed, which is really unlike me. I missed all of last nights doses of meds and all of this mornings doses of meds and that didn’t help things. I feel anger and self hatred towards myself. I just took my night meds. Hopefully I wake up tomorrow feeling better somewhat

Feel better blue bird. 🐦 I hope you wake up feeling better.

I slept all day. Like all day from 7:30AM- 5:45PM. I woke up to eat some Halo Top for lunch but I just woke up an hour ago to eat dinner. I feel a lot better.

I'm actually feeling much better then I have in a couple weeks. I read theres some relation to blood pressure medication and increased mood swings and anxiety and just overall mental health.

I'm really irritable too. I'm keeping it to myself so nobody knows except for this post.

I had a longer message here but I deleted it. There's no point in discussing stuff I can't change.

My only option is to leave and live on my own, but I can't do that right now.

Mood wise, I think I'm feeling much better than I was earlier in the week when I was worried about hypomanic symptoms. Thank God because I had a tough day at work today so, if I had manic irritability, who knows how I would have responded to the events of the day. I'm the type of happy that makes me question if I'm just happy or if I'm still to happy but I'm leaning towards I'm just happy/feeling emotions in a healthy way.

Yesterday, after work, I was stuck in bed because of my POTs. Today, I was able to get a walk in though. Laundry is currently in. As soon as that is done (still needs to finish in the wash and get into the dryer) I will head to bed early because I need to be up in the morning to video chat with my godsons. I have some other plans tomorrow too.

I'm feeling good, but nervous, about the place I found to move to in May. Mainly just nervous because of the unknowns that come with being someplace new.

I started my new nausea medicine today. I was prepared to take my migraine pill but I only had a little headache. Fine by me. I really would be totally happy never taking the samples out of the package.

I'm knitting hats for the homeless to keep my hands busy. I finished one last night but I ran out of yarn during it so it was child sized. I'm sure they need those but I think they need more adult ones. I'll make both.

My mom and I have declared tomorrow to be a day of rest. Just hanging out at home, no need to go out for anything. I can't wait.

Lunch with my son was wonderful. I had a toasted mushroom sandwich with cheese. Was delicious. Then we went to the mall and bought my son new shoes for school because his are stuffed.

Oh that sounds good. I just bought mushrooms. Canned, but still. And fake nonfat cheese sandwiches are my favorite!

Canned mushrooms sound great. So versatile. So much you can do with them!

We're back to Bipolar Checkin #87 after a brief detour through Bipolar Checkin #88.

As I type, my laundry is drying downstairs while everybody else is asleep! That way I'm ready for the day when Robert or Christopher feel social. That plus I have so much to clean still. That's not to say I won't probably take a nap at some point today. 23 minutes left! Someone had two washers and two dryers off with wet clothes in them. I understand the wet clothes in the washers but the dryers?? I don’t know if they just forgot or went to bed without attending to it first or what but I’ve got less than half an hour on the dryer then I’m outta there!

Clothes were still kinda wet so I hung them up and tried on my old jeans that wouldn’t button up and they fit!

I hate elitism. I was explaining the bare minimum of service dog training and someone decided I was giving directions on how to create fake service dogs. So I had to go through and site how the highest standard certificate has less requirements than I am saying and that just because it doesn't cost $10's of thousands of dollars doesn't mean it's fake. It's so frustrating the elitism.

I feel a lot better after good sleep and getting back on track with my meds. I slept really good. 10 hours. I took a walk to the store today and got a free gallon of milk with one of my free milk gift card certificates.

My neighbor gave me this used cat tree. Part of it needs to be fixed and one of my neighbors is gonna help because he has the tools. Papi already loves it though as you can see.

And here’s a pic of Mustachio sticking her tongue out lol

Site keeps freezing on me today & and lose everything I type.

Anyway, I slept better, did the usual. Drawings in creative corner.

Here is a crumpled piece of paper that is supposed to look realistic, I'm not sure. (Yesterday it was torn paper).

Oh what a night! My nose was stuffed so around 3am I got up and took two Benadryl. My leg was spasming so I wrapped it. I was coughing so took a cough drop,…finally, finally I dropped off. Only to dream I needed three items to do something important. They had to be different colors and I was looking everywhere, I did find them and complete my task. But oof I’m so tired today. I’m supposed to go to my daughter’s but oof. The drive!

Not much planned for Sunday. Going grocery shopping. Will come home and unpack. Then go out for lunch later. Hopefully it doesn’t rain. I have my hair down.

Added some anti-histamine eye drops to my curbside grocery pickup order for tomorrow morning. Seasonal allergies are kicking my butt. At least I have less fatigue than the past few days, and I don't really have congestion, just a slightly itchy nose but very itchy eyes. It's the eyes bothering me the most. And of course, I just feel like rubbing them which is absolutely the wrong thing to do; one year doing that gave me a bad scratch on my cornea that took ages to heal (of course, that was back when I wore contact lenses).

I had been taking both my hydroxyzine pills in the evening to help me sleep, thought I'd shift one to the daytime today to see if it would help the allergies since hydroxyzine is marketed for allergies, but nope, no go there.

It would be the case that when the weather gets beautiful outside, the pollen count is astronomical!

Sorry for not replying to anyone. Despite restarting my computer MSF is randomly freezing on me, and I lose everything I type; have to completely close the page and reopen a new MSF tab.

Well that’s a pain in the posterior! I’m not having any issues except my keyboard popping off into the neither.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu Well that’s a pain in the posterior! I’m not having any issues except my keyboard popping off into the neither.

You said it! All the other sites I've been to and have typed on work just fine.

Despite the pain and all around exhaustion I made it to the pharmacy. I did do my drawings today. Neither one turned out well. I tried to do the taco but watercolor markers don’t shade well and I only had a few.

I should sleep well tonight. I can’t believe it’s not yet 5, I’m so ready for bed now.

I'm doing ok mood and anxiety wise. I've just been sleeping all day today after sleeping all day yesterday and night. And like legit sleeping through the vaccum going kinda sleep. I've tried all the normal stuff. Coffee, soda, protein shakes, working out. Idk. I had an acai bowl for lunch. I feel fine. I'm just tired