Bipolar Check-in #87

Blueberry too bad I can’t give you a couple hours of sleep. I got too many and having a heck of a time walking up. Usually too much sleep isn’t an issue for me. But gosh. This last week except for one day, I’ve been sleeping very late.

My CT scan went decently. I guess. First I got taken back into a room to get ready. I had to take my shirt off and the tech hooked me up to an EKG and a blood pressure. Then she started an IV. She had to give me this med to lower my heart rate. People normally need less then 3 doses. I needed 7 doses. Finally my heart rate was low enough so I could go to the CT room for the scan. After that I was brought back to the first room and monitored for half an hour. It was only supossed to take 1.5-2 hours but it took almost 3.

Anyways, I'm home now and I feel ok. Just slightly nauseated from the meds. Its rare for insurance to cover this kinda test and medicare only covers it if they are looking for specific things. I heard them mention PVPs in my EKG

Tommorow I get my eyes dilated and I really have had it

Good afternoon, I slept decently. Got 6 1/2 hours then took a very short nap this afternoon.

Just had some leftover Chinese food.

I took a walk to the library and hung out there for awhile. Then when I got home I started dissociating so I did the dive reflex/Tipp DBT skill and then took the nap and woke up feeling fine.

Im just gonna read and relax, play some games today. I might get on the treadmill if I feel up to it later.

Today should be an okay day. My day off today and I see my gp for a review. Think I will be full time from next week. Yikes. A full week of work next week then a 2 week Easter Holiday break. Bring. It. On.

Took a shower, ordered groceries - i gotta have my lunch salad every day! Never thought i'd be saying THAT!

Had an amazing day today - one of the best so far. I have this special spot where I sit with the Sacred Heart of Jesus outside my adoration chapel that gives me such peace. It was such a beautiful 70-degree day today, so when I go there, and I hear the birds, feel the breeze and sit and contemplate I understand what being spiritual really means. It's been a really amazing experience.

Went to a meeting too. We were talking about the choices we now get to make since we are no longer slaves to our alcoholism. There were some really good shares, and I felt really good afterwards.

Had a really good lunch. I went grocery shopping and spent way too much money, but I got the lunch special of a chicken wrap, sour cream and onion chips and a sweet tea lemonade for $6. It was really good.

I got two emails today too, I was surprised. Usually during the week it's hard because my ex has his class, so I was pleasantly surprised. I realize though that this email situation is another part of my addiction. It really feels like that sometimes.

Sleepwise, the CPAP says I got 8 hours which is really good. I actually felt refreshed. So sorry @Blueberrybook for the sleep issues last night - hopefully mania doesn't come and give you too much trouble. @Iloveanimals25 I am sorry a CPAP wouldn't help - what would it take for you to get a bipap?

Got all dressed up again today and feeling good. There are better days over the horizon, so thankful to be out of all that darkness and praying another manic episode doesn't happen anytime soon.

I got 4 fillings, and my permanent cap. I go back in a week for a tooth pull then 2 weeks for the whole bottom redone. I don't want to my teeth weren't hurting before now they are. They are sensitive as ****. I feel pushed into this and I don't want to do it.

.I don't know if this will work but @Blueberrybook I thought this looked like your descriptions of early mornings with Pecan. It also reminded me of my now deceased kitty Anna who would do nearly anything to wake me to be fed at 4 AM when I first got her until I changed to a nighttime feeding schedule. And she was still a pest . Loved her though.

Thanks for thinking of me @LadyShadow I'm doing a little better. I have had fewer migraines the last week. I think it is from stopping my SAD lamp. I think that we were getting enough natural light that the extra was too much. I've had headaches more like every 2-3 days than daily. Nurtec works pretty well for me. I have another med to try as well and then I'll get one prescribed and will have to get patient assistance as I'm sure they are extremely expensive. I am still having nausea but it's a little less since it is sometimes caused by migraines (and often not). I'm sipping ginger ale as I'm typing this. I had asked to try prescription Pepcid (famotidine) and it's ok but I don't think it is really solving the problem. I am going to keep trying it for several more weeks though and if it doesn't improve I'll go back to the doctor..

Bipolar wise I'm doing ok. I'm tired a lot and waking with nightmares frequently. My anxiety is better than it was, especially when I remember my PRN doses of Seroquel but it has a ways tot go. But I'm definitely not badly depressed or manic so that's fine.


I do have hope that this will improve which is a lot better than I'd been feeling.

I liked my drawings today, a pillow and an elephant. I’m really liking chapter two of the 15 minute artist. But oh, I’m having so much trouble waking up in the mornings. I’m thinking of quitting the seroquel.

Tomorrow I need to be up early and gone by 9:30. The past week or so I’m not waking until 10-11am. So I’m wondering if it’s medicine related or something else. I’m going to Rochester to see my sister and bil and then to take my car in. It’s just for a check up. It’s free with my warranty. My car is all computers so I like the idea of having it checked out.

I’ve books and reader’s digest for them. We pass books back and forth and the reader’s digest passes though several family members. We’re a reading family.

Except for my extreme sleepy ness I’m doing good. I’ve cut back on spending and except for books and food haven’t been buying things.

Thanks @Nammu! The activity did end up being fun! I have a few ideas of how I'd modify it, but the kids all seemed to like it, especially the races at the end of class to see who's device was the slowest.

I'm happy with how today went. It was nice to have a hands on activity with one of my classes because we haven't had one of those in awhile. And, our students got to watch the spring play put on by some of the students. My school has two student plays a year-one in the fall and one in the spring-and they always do a performance in front of the entire school. The people who direct the play are amazing at what they do so the plays are always really good. I got a walk in today too.

All the stars have aligned and most of my meds (both prescription and over the counter) are about to run out so that is going to be expensive to refill. My toiletries are also managing to run out around the same time so that will add to the cost.

Getting bad again you guys. Getting bad again. Becoming hypersexual. Don't worry though. Won't post any spicy stuff. Learned my lesson last time.

Worried about my husband. He admitted to me tonight (before I seduced him. Haha) that he's terribly depressed, and I don't know what to do to make him feel better. 😞 What should I do?

I'm so glad you were able to stop that dissociation. The author that wrote my cbt workbook, also made those dbt and cbt cards. He really knows how to help people with our problems.

Idk, I think they will force a cpap. I'm hoping if I really how it doesn't work. If the Dr forces a cpap, I'm just going to say ok never mind. It sucks!

I'm up early again! It's 4:10 am and this time I went to sleep around 11.

Choir was fantastic! I thoroughly enjoyed it! The choir sang happy birthday to me in harmony. I felt special. N3 was there and so was his dad. He keeps petitioning for the Vaughn Williams Mass in G. It's been his favorite since I've known him! He is going to sing a piece by the same composer that includes organ and viola this Sunday for the prelude. I'm looking forward to it. I'm getting much better at singing though the director sometimes corrects my technique! Not to point me out but just as a lesson for the whole choir. She does that a lot when other people go astray, too.

Well my caregiver was stealing from me! I fired her and now she's trying to cover her butt. It sucks, I have a new person tomorrow, but she can only work one day a week. I have someone else maybe starting next Monday. I'm wore out. I'm reporting her tomorrow. I really hope this new one works out. But she was really anxious in the interview.

I just have a lot of things going on. I'm sorry I'm not responding to people. I really do hope people are doing well. 😊

I’m up early too! Didn’t sleep at all at least there’s no problem with getting up! But I’m worried about all the driving I have to do. It’s an hour each way plus the time it takes me to drive in the city. Oof, they drive so fast. I have to meet my sister and bil first, we’re having an early lunch, then I take my car in for a check up. I think they are trying to butter mme up to buy a new car. They asked if I’d like to meet with product specialist.

Good morning. I slept well, 10 hours. Just got back from a walk to the store to get eggs. So far at 3,076 steps today. Going to get on the treadmill for 30 minutes later as well. Feeling really good. I haven’t been dissociating on my walks lately so that’s good. It’s been an effort to keep myself grounded during them but I’ve managed to do it.

My mood is good. Anxiety is low. Gonna draw later. Also there’s bingo today so I’m gonna go to that later.

I started a new thread. Bipolar Check-in #88 (again!)

I'll ask the mods to close this one.