![]() |
FAQ/Help |
Calendar |
Search |
#276
|
||||
|
||||
Quote:
![]()
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
#277
|
|||
|
|||
Thinking negatively about people i care about.
Feeling judged Wanting to burst into tears every few min. wine and weed my only relief ![]() ....trying. ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() |
#278
|
||||
|
||||
Eh, I don't feel like doing **** all right now, I hate this feeling of laziness. I felt like I was gaining some traction for a little while but I feel stuck in a bit of a rut today. This woman moved into my house for like 10 days and it turns out she is mentally ill/an addict and is not taking care of herself...started exhibiting really scary/threatening behaviour so I politely kicked her out. Now I need to pay the extra rent on her behalf...well my boyfriend does cause he has money and I don't. This morning I rear-ended someone because I was driving like an idiot and who knows how much those repairs will cost. Oh, and then I crushed my fingers in the garage door and spent a few hours in the hospital. Ruined my plans of getting school work done. Now it's late in the day and it's raining and gloomy outside and I really just wanna have a nap and be done with it, but I overslept last night anyhow so it probably won't feel too good. Oh well :/
__________________
BPD // OCD // ADD // SAD // GAD |
![]() NeverBeenLoved
|
#279
|
||||
|
||||
Quote:
"Gas thingy" lol that it's technical term? ![]() Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
Verity ![]() ![]() |
#280
|
|||
|
|||
What's the point, really?
|
#281
|
||||
|
||||
Quote:
![]() hee hee ![]()
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
![]() Verity81
|
#282
|
||||
|
||||
Worried my paranoia will get the best of me in my relationship. Suddenly back to devaluing him and thinking he's cheating. In all honesty, he could be. I have no proof. Just little gut inklings.
I'm pushing him away and I know it..but then again maybe it's what I want? Maybe we're not meant to be.. I wish I knew what were genuine feelings and what are just the BPD. It's the worst part for me..
__________________
Allie Diagnosed: Generalized Anxiety Disorder & Obsessive Compulsive Disoder. Previous: Borderline Personality Disorder. I no longer qualify for a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder, but there will always be my borderline traits that I struggle with especially during times of great stress. I've been working passionately as a therapist since December 2016
![]() |
![]() Anonymous37965, Bill3, waiting4
|
![]() Bill3, Blue_velvet09
|
#283
|
||||
|
||||
Drink drank drunk as effff.
I don't want to live anymore
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow |
![]() Anonymous37965, Bill3, trying2survive, waiting4
|
#284
|
||||
|
||||
Imagine you could let a garden grow between your outstretched hands. That you could hover around tornadoes until they got tired of whirling and died. We've rationed ourselves to the parts of life that life itself resents. Imagine you could be the fabric that patched up the holes in the lining of life's nest when they told you that you're not made of stars
<3
__________________
BPD // OCD // ADD // SAD // GAD |
![]() Bill3
|
#285
|
|||
|
|||
done with my online class. Relieved.
smoking reality away now.. I feel so lonely :-/ at the same time I push people away ![]() |
![]() Bill3, waiting4
|
#286
|
|||
|
|||
A strange day today...looks to be a difficult one tomorrow as well. I'm still restricting and feeling generally quite pressured. My wounds are healing ok. I suppose the more i try to disappear the harsher reality becomes
![]() |
![]() Bill3
|
#287
|
||||
|
||||
went to see my T today, session went really well..i'm in a real good mood, ready for some ice cream! LOL!
![]()
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
![]() Bill3, Verity81
|
#288
|
|||
|
|||
Trainwreck. Stopped drinking alcohol so now just lying awake for hours in bed.
Realized he is a disrespectful *** who doesn't even deserve my friendship let alone my love, but instead of being mad at him just feeling totally in pain and hate myself for not letting this happen to me again and I feel like I don't deserve any love, cause why else would someone treat me like this?... so yea, basically just lying awake. |
![]() Bill3, trying2survive
|
#289
|
||||
|
||||
Seeing T today for Prolonged Exposure Therapy to past traumas - very nervous :/
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
Verity ![]() ![]() |
![]() Bill3, trying2survive
|
![]() Bill3
|
#290
|
||||
|
||||
Meh. Just Meh.
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow |
![]() Bill3
|
#291
|
||||
|
||||
double poster. oops
I wasn't feeling the strongest this morning...then the hay wagon got stuck and I have to go pick up a load of hay. Then the SPCA showed up because of complaints...then I came in to check FB and someone posted a nasty comment on one of the horse's I have for sale claiming he needs to be fed (who would have thought...horses need food? Boy this is news to me)...I'm crying. I'm so worn out and drained and just don't want to function anymore. I'm done. I'm just done.
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow |
![]() Bill3, trying2survive
|
#292
|
||||
|
||||
Hello world..
It is noontime and I am having another day of being anxious and overwhelmed. I need a job!! Hard to express my emotions..The days are running together..This is hard looking for a freaking job, when all they want is a cutout of an experienced candidate. Not sure what to write... ![]() |
![]() Bill3
|
#293
|
||||
|
||||
Quote:
![]()
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
#294
|
||||
|
||||
is it friday! LOL! i never know what day it is anymore! LOL! anyways off to the gym i go! couple more bills to deal w/ later and maybe some work around the yard IF THEY EVER FIX MY LAWNMOWER!!! LOL!
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
![]() Bill3
|
#295
|
||||
|
||||
still no lawnmower..they haven't even looked at it yet. grrr
i did find a neighborhood kid that will cut it tommorrow..oh and get this my dryer went out today..nice
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
![]() Bill3
|
#296
|
||||
|
||||
I am nervous. I'm staying at my boyfriends parents house for the first time and they live 3 hours away. Just a million of questions are popping into my head.. What if I split? How will I cover my emotions? What if I take something too personally and it gets awkward and I can't leave? What if I can't use the bathroom?? What if my introverted side comes out and I don't want to be around them?
I'm hoping it goes well, but I'm so socially awkward and unsure of myself I'm scared they won't like me and think I have too many issues for their son. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
![]() Bill3
|
#297
|
||||
|
||||
going to get my lawnmower...i can't believe its ready,..i wonder if i will recognize it! LOL!
![]()
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() Last edited by trying2survive; May 17, 2014 at 12:18 PM. Reason: misspelled a word im so excited! |
![]() Bill3
|
#298
|
||||
|
||||
long weekend here. I planted flowers in my front planter. Too much work to do the ones in the back yard.
__________________
Mags Depression diagnosed March 1996 PTSD diagnosed January 2000 BPD diagnosed September 2013 |
![]() Bill3
|
#299
|
||||
|
||||
cut the grass lawnmower works great! now if only the dryer....
__________________
I have learned that i and i alone am responsible for my happiness, most people these days are as reliable as wet toilet paper! ![]() ![]() |
![]() Bill3
|
#300
|
||||
|
||||
One night stand...had some really really bad sex...
I always feel bad afterwards because I don't even swing that way..guys just don't do it for me...I don't really get turned on by them. Its just whatever for me but I'm apparently very likable and they all fall for me...oops.
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow Last edited by Britneigh; May 17, 2014 at 10:21 PM. |
Closed Thread |
|