[Lovelylady77]

I am feeling very confused, ashamed, critical of myself, and unaware of reality right now. Breakups are very hard and now its like im disassociated with reality and stuck in a strange place emotionally.

[Achy Turtle Armor]

Just left my first Buddhist meditation & discussion class. Really enjoyed it. Tonight's discussion was about letting go of anger. Everything I heard was what my therapist has been telling me. I just need to practice. I feel really relaxed and peaceful right now. Such a nice change from earlier this week.

[Espresso]

I don't know how much more of this I can take. Sigh.

Originally Posted by Achy Turtle Armor

Just left my first Buddhist meditation & discussion class. Really enjoyed it. Tonight's discussion was about letting go of anger. Everything I heard was what my therapist has been telling me. I just need to practice. I feel really relaxed and peaceful right now. Such a nice change from earlier this week.

I've been thinking about attending a meditation here in town. There isn't much available in my area since it so religiously conservative around here, but they're around. Thanks for posting this! I'm glad you enjoyed some benefits.

I struggled a bit at the start of the day, but I fought my negative thinking hard today and I am very happy with my progress today. I managed to meditate and even do some of my DBT homework. I watched a lot of TED programs today – I even laughed which was so nice because I haven't laughed for weeks! It's strange to feel this good, but I'm not going to fight it or question it - I want to enjoy it.
I wish I was tired though – not sleepy. Have a good night everyone – take care.

[Bubbles&Buttercup]

After 5 hours on the train I am back in my hometown. Staying with my mum and seeing my dad tomorrow.
Emotionally I feel a bit weird being back here, I miss this town a lot more than I did last time I visited.
Physically I'm hurting, so time for sleep before lots of drinking tomorrow.

[Espresso]

I've made it through another day. Yay me.

[Achy Turtle Armor]

Back down again. Left a good T appointment yesterday. Felt good but as the evening arrived I crashed. Cried but unsure why.

This morning I wake up and remembered that I forgot to put off a huge payment until next week. So I was left with $35. This drove me into a tail-spin. I went to work briefly to receive the delivery, took care of a few items, and left after an hour there. Of course I did this all while crying. When I got home I took my migraine med, got in bed, cried for an hour or so, and fell asleep.

I have only just recovered. Meaning not bawling now and the headache it caused is gone. I have been able to look at my finances and things will be tough and scary this week. I've done this to myself because I am s*** with money.

[Britneigh]

Have the farm to myself till Monday...normally I wouldn't care much but my birthday is Sunday so it kinda stinks to be alone yet again...I got myself a cake. My boss gave me my birthday present before she left, they got me a laptop which was huge and wayyyy more than I expected. Overall I'm alright I guess. I think?

[Bubbles&Buttercup]

Great night with family last night, today I'm feeling mighty hungover and just wanna go home and lay in bed.
Hopefully catching up with a friend later tonight.

[Iamalioness]

Feeling pretty steady today - not really any emotion there. Just kind of flat.

[Achy Turtle Armor]

I'm in a lot of mental pain.

Had a tough day - it's also freaking hot (no A/C)!! I hope I can go to sleep soon. My brain is tired and so is the rest of me.

[skyxblue]

I have been having a lot of up and downs. Tomorrow is going to be rough. I can feel it.

Originally Posted by Achy Turtle Armor

Back down again. Left a good T appointment yesterday. Felt good but as the evening arrived I crashed. Cried but unsure why.

This morning I wake up and remembered that I forgot to put off a huge payment until next week. So I was left with $35. This drove me into a tail-spin. I went to work briefly to receive the delivery, took care of a few items, and left after an hour there. Of course I did this all while crying. When I got home I took my migraine med, got in bed, cried for an hour or so, and fell asleep.

I have only just recovered. Meaning not bawling now and the headache it caused is gone. I have been able to look at my finances and things will be tough and scary this week. I've done this to myself because I am s*** with money.

Dear Achy, so sorry to hear this

What about disability payments from the state ? Have you looked into whether you qualify ? I don't know much about how it works. Not sure if you can have a job AND get disability. Normally, the people I know who receive disability are those who are unemployed. I'm not sure.

Is there somewhere you can turn to ?

[Achy Turtle Armor]

Originally Posted by lilodian4ever

Dear Achy, so sorry to hear this

What about disability payments from the state ? Have you looked into whether you qualify ? I don't know much about how it works. Not sure if you can have a job AND get disability. Normally, the people I know who receive disability are those who are unemployed. I'm not sure.

Is there somewhere you can turn to ?

I don't know anything about disability either. I suppose I could start looking into it. The other frustrating thing is that I want to talk to my T about my finances but all he ever says is, "I know that finances are tight for you. That's why I hate to see you come to see me so often (every 2 weeks)." I want to be able to talk about it without him getting stuck on reducing how often I see him. I'm also afraid to ask if I can pay less money. I don't want to hear him say no. I would be devastated. I'd rather not know. I feel like I really need his support right now but all he sees is my unhealthy attachment to him. I'm not doing well and I just don't know what to do any more. F***! I'm crying again. I gotta go. Thanks for your suggestion. I will look into it.

[detachedangst]

I ran out of cymbalta for 4 days. For those of you who don't know that is a terrible terrible drug to have withdrawals from. Spent the day yesterday crying on the bedroom floor. I can't go through that ever again.

[dancinglady]

ACA. I think that if you go on disability you would get Obamacare Medicaid in your state if it is available. Your sessions would be free!!!!!
Also have you looked into Obamacare now. My sons pays $10 a month with no copays and no deductibles.
In 2 years you would get Medicare and Medicaid. Again no copays and no deductibles. Why not go to Catholic Charities for their credit counseling. I hear they are awesome. They could negotiate lower fees from your therapist plus help you with budgeting.

[Achy Turtle Armor]

Originally Posted by detachedangst

I ran out of cymbalta for 4 days. For those of you who don't know that is a terrible terrible drug to have withdrawals from. Spent the day yesterday crying on the bedroom floor. I can't go through that ever again.

Oh god. That is horrible. I also get these weird noises in my head. Some call them brain zaps. Sounds like a lightsaber.

[Achy Turtle Armor]

Originally Posted by dancinglady

ACA. I think that if you go on disability you would get Obamacare Medicaid in your state if it is available. Your sessions would be free!!!!!
Also have you looked into Obamacare now. My sons pays $10 a month with no copays and no deductibles.
In 2 years you would get Medicare and Medicaid. Again no copays and no deductibles. Why not go to Catholic Charities for their credit counseling. I hear they are awesome. They could negotiate lower fees from your therapist plus help you with budgeting.

When I get the energy to do something... Anything, I'll look into all of this. Ty.

[jeremiahgirl]

I'm running around with my cat Esther we play hide and seek! Also fighting some depressing thoughts from an earlier event.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Angelique67]

Originally Posted by detachedangst

I ran out of cymbalta for 4 days. For those of you who don't know that is a terrible terrible drug to have withdrawals from. Spent the day yesterday crying on the bedroom floor. I can't go through that ever again.

That sounds horrible. It's been one of the reasons I haven't started taking mine, seeing as how it's so hard for me to go anywhere. I hope you are feeling much better now.

turned out to be a good day - scared it will be an awful day tomorrow! I know I should be in the now....working on it....shouldn't be thinking about tomorrow. Enjoy tonight and enjoy the happy feelings.

Still HOT...no A/C!

My kids still love me (2 dogs 1 cat) - no one peed on the floor!

there should be a hot flash smilie icon thingy!

[Achy Turtle Armor]

The good thing about my depression and lack of money...

Possible trigger:

I'm losing the weight I recently gained.

I hear ya!