I was wondering if people could post their symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder here. I believe I have BPD even though I am not quite sure what it consist of. I have read on it but that doesn't help. I want real answers. For one thing that makes me think I have it is I have extreme rage and anger but mostly it is internalized and I inflict the pain on myself. I just need answers.

[greyclouds]

Everyone's symptoms are different... The best thing to do is read through peoples posts. And see what you relate too..

But defiantly one of my symptoms was inflicting pain I. To myself. But after therapy this is a very rare occasion now.
I still have angry out bursts. I still struggle with food. To hardly eating to non stop eating.
I'm not violent never been arrested.
But I drink. Smoke and shamefully taken drugs
I love people who don't love me... Yet when they do I cut them off so quick it makes there head spin!!

But not everyone is the same despite BPD. You do still own your own personality

hope this helps a little and you get the answers your looking for

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[bamaborderline]

Originally Posted by BornintoFreedom2012

I was wondering if people could post their symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder here. I believe I have BPD even though I am not quite sure what it consist of. I have read on it but that doesn't help. I want real answers. For one thing that makes me think I have it is I have extreme rage and anger but mostly it is internalized and I inflict the pain on myself. I just need answers.

I have several symptoms or problems due to BPD, I have irrational anger, am very suspicious, I have much jealousy, I always assume the worst, I don't know how to process any emotional pain or stress so I tend to turn any hurt into anger and strike out at people that love me. I am always seeking praise and attention. I have struggled with sex addiction due to the attention seeking problems from BPD. I am afraid of loosing the woman I love even though it would probably be better for her since I have emotionally hurt her so many times over the last 12 years. I am afraid of being alone, and I desperately want to be loved and wanted. Those are a few of my issues, hope that helps, feel free to question anytime.

[Mustkeepjob32]

My symptoms were dangerous sex, dangerous drugs, uncontrollable rages, inconsolable crying, hitting myself in the head, cutting myself occasionally, driving erratically when upset etc...

Hi, I understand. Diagnostic criteria are never enough. What are your other symptoms (other than the anger you mentioned) ? Perhaps, if you share them with us, we could help you figure it out.

Here are some of my symptoms:

- Uncontrollable and scary (even to myself) anger at the most insignificant things
- Extreme loneliness (not as bad anymore, because I discovered the guy in the mirror)
- Extreme jealousy: Especially when I see couples ... when I see "the life I could have had". (I use immediate and severe dissociation to dodge this one)
- Extreme anxiety about the future: Will I always be alone ? How and where will I die ? Will I ever get injured and not be able to exercise anymore ? I assure myself that, no matter what, I will be able to depart if need be.
- Constant ideation about leaving Earth (sorry, I don't like the "s" word): I'm always up for exploring the worlds beyond Earth. I don't like it here.
- Crying suddenly and at almost nothing: Feels like there's all this emotion bottled up inside, that's just waiting to come gushing out. It seizes any chance it can and comes out (sometimes) as tears.
- Ignorance is bliss: "The stock market dropped 10 points today" ... WHO GIVES A FLYING ***** ??? "Obama said, in his speech to ...." (Tuned out). I don't care about most things most people care about. I have so much to worry about in my own personal life, that world matters are completely insignificant.
- Extreme sexual frustration: I have NO love life. It's painful ... in addition to the overwhelming emotional need, there's also the physical need, and it hurts like hell. Like a 500 lb guy being starved to death.

[Astriferous]

-Strong, turbulent emotions. I don't know how to control my emotions.
-Extreme loneliness and clingy behavior
-Fearing abandonment and extreme paranoia, which leads to delusions
-EXTREME jealously
-Moderate anger, but this is usually directed at myself by SI.
-Easily irritated by others
-Feeling empty pretty much all the time

And all of this of course leads to unstable relationships.

I guess I'm what you would call the "quiet borderline"; my symptoms aren't always external.

[ifst5]

Well i would focus on seeking professional help as our answers aren't really going to tell you anything either - everyone is different. I don't have the same symptoms as another person. Granted there is commonality but there are different 'prominent' issues not to mention different severity. BPD is known for having a high criteria for diagnosis so if anger issues are the only thing you're relating too i would say it's unlikely you have BPD. Pervasiveness is another issue - these are long held difficulties that have their roots in early childhood. I hope you find the answers you need but it's unlikely it will happen here. Sorry about that but that we can still support you in a variety of different ways if necessary. Good luck.

[silver tree]

Borderline personality disorder - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

http://http://psychcentral.com/quizzes/borderline.htm

[LOSTnowFOUND]

Diagnosed a week ago (after seeing a therapist for six years). Started seeing a new therapist a month ago and she caught the symptoms right away from my patient goals list and my past history in my file.

These are my symptoms:

-Feeling lost, not real. Sometimes I imagine this is not real life, that I am not real and I stop breathing at the thought of it. Feel like I don't know who I am. My personality changes to suit whatever situation or what I feel like people expect from me. I feel like I am slivers of people in one body. (Schizophrenia has been ruled out.)
-EXTREME self esteem issues/body image issues. NO self esteem no matter what I accomplish in my personal or professional life. Feel like I look like I am 500 pounds. I am overweight but not anywhere near that number. Double chin, the way my eyes are set. Not deserving of people's love. Feel worthless, evil.
-EXTREME anger - highly irritable at anything. Major triggers are annoying sounds (kids beating a stick over and over on something), music turned too low to where I can't hear the words. Any kind of change I am not expecting. People not living up to my expectations. Life in general these days. Sometimes I throw things or start hitting myself. Never have hit anyone else or thrown anything at them.
-Trust issues - There is literally (1) person in my life I trust and I am still waiting for me to do something that will make her turn away from me. (She's like my second mom). I don't trust people. Always think people are out to get me.
-Paranoia - Tone of voice, email, text, etc....and I will become paranoid that someone is angry even if they aren't. I take things the wrong way and end up feeling like they are mad at me even if they tell me 100 times they aren't. Always see the worst in people or situations.
-EXTREME Guilt - Guilt over past mistakes. Can't let go of the guilt or that I caused other people the pain I have caused which then causes me more pain.
-EXTREME fatigue - I stay exhausted mentally and physically 24/7 no matter the meds, exercise or rest I get.
-Sexual Issues - Cheated on my first husband continuously. Remarried and cheated on this husband too. Goes from one extreme to the other....either I want it and with some random guy or not at all. Never a middle ground it seems. Hubby tries to be there for me and give me attention but at times it's not enough and it makes me restless. I will obsess and plot and fantasize. Feel like an addict like it's my drug.
-Control/OCD - Like everything to be in control and everything in it's place. The past three years I have been spiraling down and my house is chaotic, everything at this point in my life is.
-Jealousy - Jealous over people that my husband even speaks to. Jealous over his video games.
- Cut myself off from the world - People talk and I hear them but don't "hear" them, will ask them to repeat themselves several times before I get what they are saying.
- MAJOR anxiety - I worry about any and everything. Will my kids get sick and die or some horrible disease? Will my husband? How will I die? When will I die? Will I go to Heaven? Am I really saved or will I go to hell because I am a bad person? Are we going to war? Will I be able to defend and feed my kids if we do? I mean you name it and it will go off on a tangent.
-Confusion, forgetfulness
-Can not seem to get past events whether inflicted upon me or caused my me. No peace about any of those situations.
- Always afraid I will be abandoned and always feel unworthy of love. If the one person in my life (my bio-mom) didn't love me enough to keep me how will anyone else?

These are mine.........blah...........

Main point - YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

I forgot to mention the long, parallel marks on my arm that go from almost my shoulders all the way down to my wrists, like highways of pain relief. The scars showing fierce battles fought with unchallenged demons. The scars that anyone with the slightest knowledge of SI would recognize from a mile away and know I was BSing them with my cover story ("hiking accident").

I used to write on the walls of my apartment with the red liquid every night ... but only after smearing my face with it first.

I think one reason I stopped is that I don't have any more real estate left on my arms.

[LOSTnowFOUND]

Food issues.....anorexia and bulimia as a teenager. Now I am overweight and I binge eat.

I felt like I could relate to each and everyone of you.

I always feel like people are mad at me. I am constantly asking my boyfriend if he is mad. He gets quite annoyed with the repetitive questions but when he gets annoyed I only begin to freak out more.
I will do anything to stay in the relationship because I have no other hope. I feel like this guy is the only chance I have at getting married and not being alone so I will do anything in my power to not let go or screw things up.
I also have extreme dissociation where nothing feels real. I feel like I almost disappear into space. I find it so hard to explain this part of my problem because no one gets "not feeling real". Maybe you guys do.
I also, when I get really angry, instead of taking it out on other people I will take it on on me via self harm and suicide attempts.
I also self harm just to self harm. No attempts to kill, just something to release the emotions.
My self esteem is absolutely horrible. I have such a false view (this is what other people tell me) of myself. No matter where I fall on the weight range, I seem to think I am the most obese person walking the Earth. I also loose my self esteem against others. I idolize others and tend loose my self esteem doing so.
I am always paranoid that my decisions make people mad and that they will banish me from their world.

This is just a little about me.

I too have food issues. Mainly binge eating. Which I am terribly ashamed of.

Inferiority complex. I never feel good enough. Always feel like people only associate with me out of pity because I'm too worthless to actually like.
Fear of being a monster and hurting the people around me.
Fear of people realizing what a monster I am.
Suicidal thoughts because of the above points.
Also related is my inability to defend myself. I deserve to be hurt for being so worthless.
Intense, easily triggered anger.
Find myself so hideously ugly that I will avoid the hair dresser so I don't have to look in the mirror. Am terribly avoidant in general.
Little to no sense of who I am and what I want which leads to moods that adjust to the people around me.
I do have a few core beliefs that I stick to but for the most part my personality relies on the people around me.
Shame and guilt for things I couldn't have helped or should carry no blame for.
I was bulimic but have turned binge eater now.
Binge drinking.
Unsafe sex.
Impulsive spending.
Self harm.