i don't want to die, but at the same time, really do

and i don't know what to do

i'm just going back and fourth in my head.. die and get it over with, and no- and risk the chance of things becoming worser than they all ready are

anyone else felt like this at all?

Hey!
There have been times in my life when I've felt the same way. I believe "everyone" has a purpose in life. Ones purpose may not be clear in hard times, but I know your life will make a difference and make a positive impact in other's lives. When I'm feeling depressed; sometimes it helps me to take a long walk and reflect on the things I'm grateful for.

I can relate. I think about it as an option.

But it isn't do-able for me because I have tbis ridiculous kernal of hope that things will get better...time has shown that it does. It is the suffering that leads me to the thoughts...and the fact knowing nobody cares and what they will say if I do, on the other hand, that keeps me motivated to stay no matter how miserable I feel.

I have felt as though I had no reason to go on...but things have gotten a teeny bit better so there is that darn hope / proof again.

Hugs to you

Yes shattered, I understand cuz i feel the same way. I intentionally did some stuff wrong at work so now death is an option. Don't know why I allow it to b an option but I do. I could quit my job, correct what I did wrong, etc. I have lots of options but yet I entertain thoughts of suicide. It makes me feel real crazy.

I do believe things will get better. How r u doing today? R u feeling any better?

A very wise person once told me that suicidal thoughts are like a statement, a statement that says "I am in *this much* pain.". It is one of many thoughts that don't require any action at all.

Hi Shattered -- I've felt many times like that, but I was brought up that suicide wasn't an option because God was the only one who decided when it was time to go -- AND suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Things aren't always going to be this way. Things ALWAYS change. There is ALWAYS hope. And ALWAYS in my life, when things were at their worse, things got better!! ALWAYS. There wasn't a time when I was down and out that things didn't get better. Yes, sometimes I had to wait awhile, but they got better.

Life is worth living just for the sake of living it! Waking up each morning and seeing the sunrise! Hearing the birds cheep. Now that winter is comiing, waiting for the first snowfall. There are all sorts of wonders in this world. And even tho we've seen them a million times before, we can make them seem like the first time if we want to. Life is GREAT. Hugs, Lee

well, not really.

not been doing too good these last few weeks

what about you?

All the time! Struggle pretty much daily. You are not alone.

I have these feelings alot. I have to remind myself daily that there are people that it would eggect negatively if I was to die from suicide. It would be bad for them even if I was to die naturally, but yjey would forever wonder if they could have prevented it if I was to take my own life.

That hit home for me.. I haven't been suicidal, but I have had the thoughts, which seem to add an element of rationality to my woes. it's a form of validation

@ Thoughtbubble - Yes, a kind of quanitifying of the degree of pain, and also maybe also the degree of feeling stuck and not knowing what to do to get relief. It really says I don't like this and I want something different.

Hi shattered sanity,

Sorry you are feeling so bad, but it is good you are seeking help and getting good support here, I hope you are feeling a bit more at ease with your thoughts and feelings, if you ever just need someone to let it all out to PM I am here and willing to listen if you feel you want to.

Sending you hugs and wishing you all the best MIP

Echoes u r so wise. My job is pushing me over the edge and I feel stuck. I live n stress and fear with my job but continue to stay. Thx for the wise words.

Ive had suicidal thoughts today but overall had a good day. Went out to lunch with my husband and had a phone conversation with a dear friend. I may not have mentioned but I am married to a jewel. I'm good at marriage but suck at jobs. What kind of support do u have at home?

Please listen to what echoe has said. Its excellent advice!

This is wonderful, and something I will try to remember. Because I have felt suicidal more times than I could possibly count. And what comes through my head is, "I am suffering so much, and I have NO IDEA what to do to release it, alleviate any of it."

I love the, "doesn't require any action." That just on its own, it is enough....the statement in one's head of feeling that way is enough. I dunno, it's sort of comforting and a relief.

thank you ECHOES!!

I believe that suicidal people often struggle with whether or not to commit suicide. If we really do die, we will disappoint many people. However, we often think that we are sort of helping the people around us by relieving their burden and not to let them feel worried, depressed about us etc. Suicide can be so tempting.