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  #1  
Old Nov 28, 2013, 09:42 AM
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lagisado29 lagisado29 is offline
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No one cares. No one understands. I'm just alone, and it sucks.

I will spend today seeing how happy everyone else is. No one will realize that my life is falling apart. Personally, professionally, emotionally.

No one know the stress in my life. No one knows the tormenting thoughts inmy head. No one knows. I fake it well. And most people just care about the people they are close to. I'm close to no one.

Oh well. Another day to check off the list. I just wish someday it could all be done.

I can't take my life at this point. But somehow, can't the pain just end. What's the point to living?
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  #2  
Old Nov 28, 2013, 04:18 PM
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wife22 wife22 is offline
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Why don't you stop faking and tell what's wrong,?post it,we care ... Let it out ,share,it just might help.
Many of us fake,just to go on ......say ,what is it that is hurting so much?
Thanks for this!
NWgirl2013
  #3  
Old Nov 28, 2013, 08:17 PM
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lagisado29 lagisado29 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wife22 View Post
Why don't you stop faking and tell what's wrong,?post it,we care ... Let it out ,share,it just might help.
Many of us fake,just to go on ......say ,what is it that is hurting so much?
Wow. I do try. Doesn't help. It just feels like I keep trying, and nothing gets better. Family, work, and health issues all bombard me. But in real life, who wants to hear people complain all the time. And the areas I'd complain about --. All three of those areas are a total mess right now, and aren't those three of the areas most people find their purpose for living in. Instead my health sucks ( but doctors have nothing to diagnosis, I have no family, and my job is in jeopardy. Dealing with these stresses, and then coming home to an empty house day after day is exhausting. I just want to give up and sleep. Finally, some people would tell me to get out of the house and find something to do to take my mind off of it. Unfortunately, its winter where I live, and I can't do that either because I'm pretty much home bound because of my health issues. I'm running out of stamina to keep trying. So I try to keep it together, and fake that I'm strong enough to handle my restrictions. That seems the only choice. It's just eats away at the inside is all. I'm not sure people scan understand how frustrating and isolating it is to have health issues that isolate you further, especially when you have no family to assist you with them.
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NWgirl2013, PeachCream22, wife22
  #4  
Old Nov 28, 2013, 08:18 PM
cherelle1979 cherelle1979 is offline
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Location: State College, PA
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I just joined this site and saw your message. It spoke tons to me. It sounds just how I am feeling today and have been for awhile now.

I'm curious, what kind of thoughts do you have that you think others don't understand? I can't seem to get anyone to listen to me that I am close to losing it in a way, but still mentally very visibly sane in other ways.

I have this intense fear of being abandoned by my boyfriend who was great in the beginning of our relationship but I haven't treated him poorly because I imagined all kind of things. That's only part of the problem though. I am feeling very alone myself right now.

I'd love to talk to you!
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NWgirl2013, Sameer6, wife22
  #5  
Old Nov 28, 2013, 08:50 PM
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I've noticed most people don't care about me. Most wouldn't know if I disappeared. But life is like that. We're so many. We get lost in the crowd.

My family is hours away and my parents are not healthy anymore. Two of my friends totally betrayed me. I still have one friend left. I DO think it is important to have a person you can lean on sometimes and that can lean on you. There are tons of lonely people out there. The hard part is just for you to find each other. But it can make all the difference.
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NWgirl2013
  #6  
Old Nov 28, 2013, 09:09 PM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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Being alone with major medical diagnosis in limbo, just sucks! I was alone for my first bout of optic neuritis. Life was spiraling, at that point. I think, the illness had been coming on a while going into that day I woke up with that.

You aren't alone here.
Thanks for this!
NWgirl2013
  #7  
Old Nov 29, 2013, 12:56 AM
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wife22 wife22 is offline
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"Wow. I do try. Doesn't help. It just feels like I keep trying, and nothing gets better. Family, work, and health issues all bombard me. But in real life, who wants to hear people complain all the time. And the areas I'd complain about --. All three of those areas are a total mess right now, and aren't those three of the areas most people find their purpose for living in"

you know,we r all here to talk,be heard,share.There are people out there who will hear you,understand you,support you. It suck that you have to come to empty home,but imagine people coming "home " which is abusive and painful....You can always share your thoughts here,where you are definitely not alone.It will not substitute close family,but might give you enough faith in your strength to find your way to happiness.We are always here,ready to listen
  #8  
Old Nov 29, 2013, 02:25 AM
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PeachCream22 PeachCream22 is offline
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You're more than welcome to rant here...

But what is it that you truly want out of this? Do you want us to give you advice regarding those three areas of your life, or do you want us provide support in your unstable life right now?

We'll try our best to help in any way we can, to stop you from feeling what you feel. We know how it feels, and we very much would like to help too! And we do care, cause we understand.

Hope you find some stability and peace of mind soon.
Thanks for this!
lagisado29
  #9  
Old Nov 29, 2013, 09:28 AM
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lagisado29 lagisado29 is offline
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Asking what I want out of jointing this forum is a good question. I'm not sure I know the answer though. I don't think I'm just seeking advice. I feel I know the right answers. ( stop dwelling/ start living). And it probably is better to come home to an empty house, than an abusive one. I've been beat up before. I know. But there is also the other side. Hearing everyone's stories of family, and not having one of your own. I spend the holidays alone. Never married. No children. No relationship that even got close.

I guess I'm just seeking a place to vent at times in a forum that's safe, because I can be anonymous here. And maybe in venting ill figure out why my life ended up in such a sucky place.

I'm in my 40's, hold a professional job, and out in public need to act like I got it together. Like if life gives you a raw deal, you can still beat it. But being at home hurts. And the questions I keep asking are what did I do to end up alone? Why is my family (parents, brother) not understand me? And I ask where is God in my life?

I have a significant visual impairment, and live in a community without public transportation. But this is where my job has me. I can get out walking spring through fall. But winter hits, and I'm stuck. Literally. Alone and stuck. And therefore, things I do do to help, have to end for several months. It seems like a big joke sometimes. I force my self to be self reliant, and the one thing I Ned to be self reliant (vision and transportation) isn't available.

I feel like I'm always grieving a loss. Loss of my vision, loss of independence, loss of close family member due to dementia. And now there is a terrible situation at work, that will probably be the most stressful of my career.

I don't know what I'm seeking though. I just want it not to hurt so bad. I want one area that can feel better is all.

Sorry if my motives should be different.
Hugs from:
NWgirl2013, wife22
  #10  
Old Nov 29, 2013, 11:54 PM
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wife22 wife22 is offline
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Personally me writing and venting on this site helps with anxiety.so go ahead vent as much as you want .
Best wishes
Thanks for this!
NWgirl2013
  #11  
Old Nov 30, 2013, 03:25 PM
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gruvingal gruvingal is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2013
Location: Eastern Washington State
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Wow! When I saw "No one cares" I knew I had to read this. That is exactly how I feel sometimes. I actually say that! I am sorry you are alone in your time of need. This site has been my Godsend! I can get on anytime and express how I feel from changing my Daily Mood to posting or just reading what others have posted. I have found I learn a lot more by reading and finding that there are other people out there in similar situations. I hope you find support here and you are never here!
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"A woman is like a teabag. You never know how strong she is until she gets into hot water!" Eleanor Roosevelt

"Each of us is completely different from the other, and yet we judge ourselves and others as if we are all the same." Gruvingal
Thanks for this!
wife22
  #12  
Old Nov 30, 2013, 03:34 PM
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nycgal448 nycgal448 is offline
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Man, that feeling is all too familiar. Alot of times I feel thast way. I only have my 2 bff.
family does not support me, and mom cares less
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  #13  
Old Nov 30, 2013, 03:43 PM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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  #14  
Old Nov 30, 2013, 04:39 PM
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wife22 wife22 is offline
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this site helped me to "talk it out",since despite being married with kids,I don't have anyone to talk to,sad,but true... it makes me feel ,at least sometimes, I am not that lonely.If I feel particularly lonely I join chat .
hope it helps
  #15  
Old Dec 01, 2013, 06:02 PM
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AngstyLady AngstyLady is offline
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Surely you have at least one close friend or family member you can open up to about all this Life is very worth living- you have to enjoy the little things in life. Like a baby's laugh, the smell of flowers (as cliché as that sounds), a cute kitten or puppy (etc); good meals- nostalgic smells; etc. Because without life, there is nothing. And then you won't have anything. As painful as things in life can be- I believe it will make things that much more worthwhile when things start turning around for you. And they will. What goes up, must come down- and come back up again.
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