Too Emotional

I have come to the conclusion that I am ruled by my emotions - logic doesn't seem to come into it and that is why most of the time my life is a mess. For instance I could see the relationship with my partner who I believe to be NPD was wrong - he raged - he belittled he verbally and physically abused me and yet my emotions still tell me I love him, I forgive him over and over again but in the end it is me who gets hurt and discarded with everything being blamed on me. How can I learn not to let my emotions rule over me. I need to become harder and far more logical - instead of which I am guided purely by emotion - usually love or sympathy or empathy and whereas I don't want to lose touch with them I would love to be able to integrate them with logic and reason!

Best to leave this situation, he will not change, and your abuse will only get worse. We are all ruled by our emotions. Go in the direction of your feelings, become softer, and throw out the logic. It is your Escape from this bad relationship.

I can't honestly say I know allot about this sort of thing. I guess I'm ruled by emotions allot too. But I'm not in an abusive relationship. I think that realizing you're ruled by your emotions is a huge step in the right direction toward self-knowledge. Whether or not you need to become harder & more logical is another question. The thing is though that this sort of transformation is a gradual process... one that can take time. In the meantime, you're in a potentially dangerous relationship it sounds like. What I think you probably need now is the support to make the choices you need to make. Is there some type of support group or women's advocacy organization where you could find the support you need? Going it alone in this type of situation is difficult regardless of how emotional or logical you are.

I can say I understand this as well. I am an very emotional person and much of that I love about myself...but I have definitley made bad decisions when I let my emotions totally rule. It takes time. I am better about it without losing the things I like about myself...thus one of my signatures...

I struggle with feelings that lead and hurt. I hope I might think first and catch things before I go with them. It would be lovely to get a grip!

i have found that experience is the best teacher, not the friendliest, not the most understanding..but simply the best teacher.it is up to each of us to listen to the lessons life teaches us, when we don't listen and correct the problem..pain and suffering persist. many of my problems..as well as yours are of our own making.

sometimes we know the "correct" decision, the one most beneficial to us, yet we refuse to do so. to do so would be to make a "change" we don't wish to do, to take us out of our comfort zone, or to make us do "work" that we are too emotionally lazy to do(search for a new partner, one that is good for us).

it's easier to stay with the person we are with that is not good for us..because we are comfortable with them, we have done the leg work already..we don't want to do the legwork of meeting someone new," it's time consuming", it's a pain in the *ss", "what if i find somebody even worse?" we tell ourselves..all excuses to avoid the elephant in the room.

experience is teaching you, but you aren't listening to the message.
so instead, you let your emotions take over..because it feels better than logic and reason...logic and reason are telling you something you don't want to hear...thus you let the emotions fill you with hope for change that isn't coming..then again, you are frustrated by failure.

logic and reason don't give you the fireworks and passion, but it protects you from prolonging the pain & helps you avoid pain and suffering in the first place! rely on your logic & reason....and the emotions will fall back under control, recognize emotions for what they are..feelings,tension,pressure.
once you recognize the emotions only then can you begin to control them.

You've left out the real emotion that is masquerading
as love/sympathy/whatever . . . . . . .it is FEAR.
Afraid of being alone again--that fear can create
ANY EMOTION,so that you don't know it's there.
Try this site: woundedsouls.com