[Zoe86]

Is it possible that you are surrounded by your family you love and care, but feeling at the same time alone? You also know that they love you and care about you but it doesn't help you? This is at the moment my situation and it's making me so sad that I can't stop this feelings.
Why is it, when they ask you how your day was or how are you feeling that you are always saying that it was a good day and I'm fine? Why can't you simple say I'm not OK, that I'm tired and feeling so lonely.
I have such up and downs. Today I have these thoughts and tomorrow I'll think why I'm so silly thinking such things, when other people in the world are in a more badly situation? But I can't help it. I always telling myself how good my life is and I should be very happy and grateful, but I know that something is missing. I'm feeling so hollow. I have no real friends to talk to and it burdens me much.
Please, I need some help. Maybe somebody has an advice for me!

Originally Posted by Zoe86

Is it possible that you are surrounded by your family you love and care, but feeling at the same time alone? You also know that they love you and care about you but it doesn't help you? This is at the moment my situation and it's making me so sad that I can't stop this feelings.
Why is it, when they ask you how your day was or how are you feeling that you are always saying that it was a good day and I'm fine? Why can't you simple say I'm not OK, that I'm tired and feeling so lonely.
I have such up and downs. Today I have these thoughts and tomorrow I'll think why I'm so silly thinking such things, when other people in the world are in a more badly situation? But I can't help it. I always telling myself how good my life is and I should be very happy and grateful, but I know that something is missing. I'm feeling so hollow. I have no real friends to talk to and it burdens me much.
Please, I need some help. Maybe somebody has an advice for me!

Hello Zoe86: What you are experiencing is exactly what I experience, so I know where you're coming from with this. I'm not personally surrounded by family. It's just my wife & me. But she loves me & cares deeply for me & yet I feel completely alone. And whenever she asks if I'm okay, I say: "oh sure, I'm just tired..." or something similar. And I also have those thoughts about how can I feel so bad when others have it so much worse...

Of course, therapy is one answer here. I don't have a T. But many people are helped by them & the aloneness & guilt you feel are two of the types of things people go to therapy for. And, of course, posting here on PC as you have done can help too! Beyond that, I would think that if you could find one or two family members whom you could open up to, this would help. Keeping this stuff bottled up inside is definitely not the answer. Somehow, somewhere you must find a way to "ventilate" these thoughts & feelings. Therapy groups can also be a valuable resource if there are any you could access. Some people find that meditation & various forms of exercise are helpful. There are also telephone hotlines one can call. In the U.S. there's the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. One does not have to be feeling suicidal to call. They advertise that they're there to help with any problem. So you could just call a hotline of this kind & talk about the feelings you're having.

The one other idea I have is, from my personal perspective, I think it's important to find something you're passionate about you can pursue. It doesn't matter what it is, I don't think. But it needs to be something you love. I've had an on-again / off-again meditation & yoga practice over the years. Recently I've been trying to revive this & put new emphasis on it as a way of "ventilating" my own feelings of aloneness & guilt. (So far, so good...) Best wishes...

[glok]

Hello, Zoe.

LONELINESS---Loneliness of Spirit: Deeper than the Reach of Love by James Leonard Park.

I wish you well.

[Zoe86]

Thank you for your post The Skeezyks! The biggest problem is, that I'm afraid to tell someone about my problems, even to open up to someone. I'm afraid they wouldn't take me seriously and think I would just seek attention. So I keep everything to myself and sometimes it's like, that my head is full with bad thoughts. I know I shouldn't let it go to my head but I don't know how to ban it. It's really frustrating!

[Evexoxo]

We are in similar situation. I always feel alone around my family and i have a big family,i just sit in my room do nothing then regret it why i am not spending time with my family,may be it can help me overcome this loneliness but when am with them i end up acting angry or short tempered.

[Zoe86]

Originally Posted by Evexoxo

We are in similar situation. I always feel alone around my family and i have a big family,i just sit in my room do nothing then regret it why i am not spending time with my family,may be it can help me overcome this loneliness but when am with them i end up acting angry or short tempered.

I love my family, I really do, but I have good and bad days. On bad days I always pretending that everything is OK, but in reality it isn't. I just don't want to hurt their feelings!

[C0Nspiritus]

Originally Posted by Zoe86

Is it possible that you are surrounded by your family you love and care, but feeling at the same time alone? You also know that they love you and care about you but it doesn't help you? This is at the moment my situation and it's making me so sad that I can't stop this feelings.
Why is it, when they ask you how your day was or how are you feeling that you are always saying that it was a good day and I'm fine? Why can't you simple say I'm not OK, that I'm tired and feeling so lonely.
I have such up and downs. Today I have these thoughts and tomorrow I'll think why I'm so silly thinking such things, when other people in the world are in a more badly situation? But I can't help it. I always telling myself how good my life is and I should be very happy and grateful, but I know that something is missing. I'm feeling so hollow. I have no real friends to talk to and it burdens me much.
Please, I need some help. Maybe somebody has an advice for me!

I think because most people have their own problems and don't want to burden others so it's rather a perfunctory reply. I think if you have no emotional support is a Therapist.

I can only think that if you divert your mind, keep it busy, that interim that might help you. Keeping your mind occupied with something does not give you the time to dwell because your mind is busy doing something else.

Feel better!

Originally Posted by Zoe86

Thank you for your post The Skeezyks! The biggest problem is, that I'm afraid to tell someone about my problems, even to open up to someone. I'm afraid they wouldn't take me seriously and think I would just seek attention. So I keep everything to myself and sometimes it's like, that my head is full with bad thoughts. I know I shouldn't let it go to my head but I don't know how to ban it. It's really frustrating!

Hi Zoe: Yes, I know about this... I have written elsewhere, on several occasions, if denial were blankets, I'd have been crushed by the weight years ago. So I also kept everything to myself to the extent where at times I felt as if my head would explode!!! (Often what did explode was my temper...) And, eventually it all built up to the point where I began trying to figure out ways to dispose of myself. It took a long time, but it happened.

One simply can't live day-in / day-out, year-in / year-out with that kind of internal pressure. The stress it creates will out one way or another, sooner or later. It's like putting too much pressure on a boiler. At some point the pressure is going to become too much. And, at that point, the boiler will give out at it's weakest spot.

I certainly understand your not feeling as though you want to, or can, talk with family members. I could not have done this either. But, based on my experience, I have to say it is important for you to find someone you can talk to. Probably the best option would be a therapist if this is a possibility for you, or a therapy group.

If your situation is such there is simply no one you can talk to, period, then perhaps the back-up plan needs to be (as other commenters here have suggested) some type of activity you really enjoy & can focus your attention on. Physical exertion, such as from participation in some sports activity, can also be very helpful, whether or not you receive therapy.

By the way, as the saying goes: don't "should" on yourself! It's no failing on your part that your thoughts are troubled. And no one can simply ban thoughts from their head. If this were possible, we'd have no need for therapists... or PC either, for that matter! Your struggles are essentially similar to those we all have, especially those of us here on PC. It's all part of being human...