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#1
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Someone tell me the return policy for emotions because I don’t want them anymore. All of them good and bad. Everything feels like the world is ending. It’s exausting and unpleasant regardless. It just feels like I can’t get a break. Everything comes a bit extreme and it’s very overwhelming. Wanna know why I’m always tired, because there’s no such thing as calm or content, everything runs at 110% power.
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Because in truth, I am that monster.
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![]() Anonymous47864, astoldbyginger, katydid777, littleflower91, MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul, Open Eyes, xiximmxi
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#2
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((((rise13eyond)))) Emotions are what makes us humans. I'm sorry you're struggling, but perhaps you just need to learn to keep them under control?
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![]() astoldbyginger, katydid777, rise13eyond
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![]() astoldbyginger, mote.of.soul
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#3
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The return policy for emotions is being cold and unfeeling unfortunately and then we become ineffective humans who can't relate to, empathize or truly help those who are around us ![]() |
![]() MickeyCheeky, rise13eyond
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![]() MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul
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#4
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Hey rise13eyond. Just wanted to say I can definitely relate to not wishing to have emotions as well, most definitely. Especially my darker, negative ones as they blank everything out for lengthy amounts of time like an eclipse. An awful, awful eclipse. And if I get triggered, which is often, then you can times the bleakness by say a factor of twenty. Sick of it, tbh. You're right, it's draining. It's draining to be constantly trying to tread water for a breath of fresh, clean air. That's how it feels for me. Wow, life is such a gift, is it not? Lol You have to laugh sometimes :-) But, hey - it's good if you can gain a perspective on things, friend. Hope you're going okay and thanks for letting me share, as well. |
![]() astoldbyginger, MickeyCheeky, rise13eyond
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![]() astoldbyginger, MickeyCheeky
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#5
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the fact that you can feel these things in your post rather than dissociating that says a lot to me. that says you have made amazing progress and healing of your dissociation problems and now are ready to feel like other non dissociative people do. my point yea its hard but I remind myself every time I am able to feel instead of dissociating how far I have come. its not much but it does help me to feel better when I flip the negative into a positive. maybe this same trick will help you. its ok to let your self feel and then decide what you want to do about what you are feeling and what changes you want to make in your life to add calm and contentment now that you are able to feel things. what I did to add calm and contentment to my life when I no longer dissociated to extremes when I felt hard emotions was .... take a walk out in nature or to a favorite place row my canoe around the lake bake something that I enjoy with all my senses call my treatment provider who is always ready with suggestions to help get me through feeling instead of dissociating. |
![]() Anonymous47864, astoldbyginger, MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul, rise13eyond
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![]() astoldbyginger, MickeyCheeky
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#6
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![]() astoldbyginger, MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul, rise13eyond
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#7
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Feeling intense emotions is so painful. If you can learn to control the catastrophizing tendency, it will help. To feel nothing is to be dead and you really wouldn’t want that.
__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
![]() Anonymous47864, MickeyCheeky
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![]() MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul, rise13eyond
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#8
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I have nothing wise to add here. I just want to say I understand how it feels to be overwhelmed and exhausted by emotions. ❤️
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![]() Anonymous40258, MickeyCheeky, mote.of.soul, rise13eyond
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#9
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It's understandable that you want this because the things that challenge you are things that come from a very sensitive amygdala that is brought on by experiencing too many early traumas and not having the life skills to know how to self protect better. That is why you developed disassociating into different ways of handling the different challenges you face.
However ((rise13)), human beings actually do create characters all the time to help deal with all kinds of challenges. Something "greater than" ourselves that we can reach out to to bring comfort. We all want to embrace some kind of character that has the ability to bring peace and resolve and emotional calming, a presence that can actually help each of us learn "what to do with these challenging emotions we experience". A young woman got pregnant, was kicked out of her home and was suddenly homeless. This woman would sit in a little restaurant and she began to quietly imagine a different world with all kinds of different characters, some with amazing powers, magical powers and a magical place that taught young special little human beings to master some very magical skills. Little did this woman know she was in the process of creating something that would capture the interest of so many other people who too wanted to imagine "with" her. We are talking about a woman who most definitely was emotionally challenged and battling depression, yet she ended up creating the amazing world of "Harry Potter". This woman sat and disassociated into an imaginary world, a world she could control away from the reality of the real world she had been living at the time. It isn't that you struggle so much emotionally, it's that you have not quite found a productive way of channeling these emotions. This is actually a very common challenge when it comes to human beings. As a result, we have countless stories, gods, and music that we create to bring us comfort. Things would be quite boring without emotions actually, did you ever think about that? When a child has to face an environment that child doesn't know how to control, that child tends to create their own world where they can find comfort. However, some of the amazing things human beings end up creating actually begin within the imagination "first" and that's what is so amazing about human beings. Who would have thought that when someone imagined the fictional world of "Star Treck" that one day that imagined phone would end up becoming a reality that we all use now? Emotions drive imagination and communications that can lead to creating actual things we end up having in the "real world". So, while it's so very hard to deal with emotions, they are not as "bad" as we come to believe. Often our emotions are the beginning of something we end up creating into becoming a reality. |
![]() MickeyCheeky, rise13eyond
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![]() MickeyCheeky, rise13eyond
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#10
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As far as I know she does not have any dissociation/ disassociative problems. but i may be wrong considering I dont keep up with her writings much anymore. |
![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#11
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That is not the history I had read about her amandalouise. Actually, if I remember correctly I think I watched a special about her where it might have been on 60 minutes or a program like that. If my memory serves me correct she did not have her other children until after she began to be a success too. I remembered it because I was very surprised to learn how she began writing and she had been suffering from depression. I did not mean to give the impression that she suffered from disassociation, my point about that is to understand how human beings can "create" ways to overcome some very big challenges they are dealing with in life. A way to escape and find a way to see life through a different lens.
JK Rollings did battle Depression. Things you didn't know about 'Harry Potter' author J.K. Rowling - INSIDER Quote:
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![]() amandalouise, MickeyCheeky
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![]() amandalouise, MickeyCheeky
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#12
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Rise13eyond, I keep asking my therapist about this and I'm never happy with her answer. "Emotions are important," she says, yet I use my uber logic to counter every response she has. I beg her to tell me how to become a robot, functioning solely on logic instead of emotion.
Generally, people who feel this way (myself included) feel emotions more strongly than most and we struggle to process these emotions. They're easier to turn off than to deal with head-on. Technically, by definition, amandalouise is right: Detaching from your emotions is disassociating. However, I've fully disassociated many times in the last year and a half, but I've also spent almost all of the year and a half with at least some of my emotions off. If you're going to tell me that I've been disassociating solidly for all those months, just some incidences more extremely than others, I'd argue with you (although I'd admit I understand why you'd think so based on the definition). I don't see it as the same thing when all of my emotions are turned off because they became overwhelming, resulting in me losing sensations in my body, things being more dream-like, my reaction speed is drastically diminished, my memory turns to mush, and I act like a robot just going through the motions... As compared to times when I'm completely in the here and now, everything is normal, except my emotions are off, but I'm able to acknowledge that I would feel a certain way if my emotions did work, and I will be upset with the outcome if I didn't take those emotions into consideration. Because of all this time I've spent ignoring my emotions, I've become hyper-logical -- which, if I was a lawyer, would be a great thing but in reality is annoying to everyone around me and it frustrates me when people don't react via logic and reason. (I face-palm myself frequently that people don't realize the world would be a better, less war-torn place if people stopped trying to impose their beliefs on others.) So my "official" response will be based on logic: Emotions are important, no matter how uncomfortable they feel, and they serve a function of some sort (although I've yet to understand why). If we learn to recognize and deal with our emotions before they become big/extreme then they won't be as hard to deal with. If undealt with, emotions just build up pressure until they blow like a bomb, only how and when they then express themselves are unknown and unpredictable. Alternately, turning off most of your emotions and functioning mostly based on logic, it will only serve to frustrate you that others don't act logically, instead letting emotion affect their behavior. |
![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() MickeyCheeky, xiximmxi
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#13
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I’m sorry to hear that you’re going through such a hard time.
Are you on any meds or recently getting off them? If it gets terrible you definitely should consider citalopram, which will slow you down a little but easy to get off. |
![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#14
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I've always been very emotional and sensitive.
Those words have negative connotation to them and for the longest time I blamed myself, until I just accepted the fact that being aware of your / other people's feelings is a gift not a weakness - some people are clueless. It can be overwhelming sometimes, to feel more than others... But I'd rather have a bleeding heart than have no heart at all.
__________________
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#15
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Some of us have the exact opposite problem. Trust me, it doesn't make things better. Then you'd feel all alone and isolated.
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