Feeling depressed

Life is too hard. Losing weight is hard, buying a house is hard, saving money is hard, everything is just hard. I'm tired of trying and getting no where. I've been asking God what I have to do to go home. I'm ready for life to be over.

Hey Aviza, are you safe now? Pm me if you need a check in buddy, too many of us slip away without anyone giving a ****. Excuse the language. Please add or pm, I live in the night. Lol. Hope to hear from you. I agree by the way, life is hell so that we can laugh for such a short time in the aggregate before we die. Don't go without fighting, you deserve to be here!

Dear Aviza, I feel this way, too. My main problem is the voices. They are horribly cruel, & the noises. I'm so exhausted, physically & emotionally. But I keep believing that things will be better later on. And I want to be here to see that. I'm crying while I write this, because I'm hurting & struggling at this moment & at the same time I'm remembering you have been through so much & you keep trying, so I understand it's just too hard. But try to see that light ahead & do what ever you can to hold on so you can enjoy your new life when this bad time is over with. Hugs & love to you, dear Aviza!

I’m depressed much of the time. I try to live in the present MOMENT.
There are many moments that I feel very down. BUT , there are other
moments when I feel “ok” , or simply nothing at all. Sometimes I’m overcome
with negative feelings. There are fleeting moments when I have “good”
feelings. I make a gratitude list. I try to be grateful for what has NOT happened
in my life. I’ve wondered a lot about the “ why am I here question “ , or “:what’s
this all about “. And I get the same answer everybody else gets , “ I don’t
know “. Whatever the case , I will exist moment to moment until I don’t exist
anymore.

I feel the same way. And I feel ashamed of it because I'm supposed to want to keep trying and fighting.

I'm also struggling to reach out here in the forums, which surprises me and I don't understand. Every time I think of anything to type, whether in response to someone else or for myself, I hesitate, start over thinking it, worry about expressing myself well and spelling mistakes, until either I've completely forgotten what I originally wanted to say or finally am just so frustrated and flustered I say, ah to **** with it. Maybe next time.

Yours Truly - a lot of times i write a response here, then just dont submit. I just "back out" of the reply screen. My response is saved for a while in case i decide its okay, but usually i just get whatever im feeling off my chest, without affecting anybody. Saves me making decisions!

You said a lot in a short post. YoursTruly , I think I know what your going thru because I feel the same way myself. I’m ashamed also for not wanting to “stick it out” , just keep going. I’m tired. It’s the shame that hurts a lot and keeps me depressed. I also will start writing a response or anything and STOP, to THINK about so many things that I forget what you originally wanted to say. With me it’s about procrastination , it’s about not being able to focus , it’s about not finishing a task. Sure , put it off or don’t do it at all. Yes , I know the feeling. BUT , if you just take it moment to moment you just might get it done.

Aviza……Everything seems hard but the strength is within you to move on.
There are ways out of the mazes we find ourselves in. We just have to find it.
If we keep looking , keep asking questions, hopefully we will find the answers
to our questions and may I even say , prayers ? What do we have to lose ?
Just our lives. Sometimes the answer is right around the corner or a few minutes away. It all ends someday for all of us.

Somebody wrote on here a few years ago, and i still think of it when i feel overwhelmed:

Yard by yard, life is hard.
Inch by inch, life's a cinch!

I hear what you are saying I been there myself. I wish that I could hug you. :sadhug: :hug: :grouphug:

Thanks guys. I'm feeling a bit better but not totally yet. I'll get back to normal soon. I reduced my meds, wasn't a good idea.

Thank you, Aviza! It's so good to know you're ok. And thank you so much for being here with us!