[black-roses]

I don't know if anyone can ever accept my dark past I feel like it makes me unlovable I don't know if anyone will ever forgive me for how I treated my mother when I was younger. I want her to forgive me I wish I could take it all back. I didn't want to stress her with my mess, I didn't want her to carry the weight of my problems I didn't want it to be like this. It's just too late and she'll resent me and hate me forever and when she dies all illl have is my regret of how ****** of teenager I was.

[Skeezyks]

I hope you will be able to find a pathway through your feelings regarding your dark past.

I'm old. And I have a dark past over which I carry around a huge load of guilt and shame. Too late to do anything about any of it now. Over time, unresolved guilt and shame can eat a person from the inside out. (I know this from personal experience.)

In my case, my past is something I was never able to talk about with anyone. I probably should have. I hope you have the opportunity to do so, as well as to find ways to resolve whatever damage you feel you did. Since I never did it, I can't say whether or not it helps. But I think it's worth a try. The one thing I do know is that simply allowing those feelings of being unlovable and unworthy of forgiveness to go unresolved is a prescription for ongoing sorrow as the years roll by. Best wishes...

[black-roses]

I don't have anyone to talk to about it tbh when I did have a counsellor I didn't want to go into detail because she was young and I didn't want to traumatize her with my past.