Depressed or just STRESSED??

I talked to my husband this afternoon and let him know that I was going to be making an appointment to see someone asap because I'm tired of living this way. I was surprised when he agreed that he thinks I could be suffering from depression. I have always had pretty low self-esteem but since I have had my kids almost 4yrs ago it's gotten worse and I think that is because of how much stress I'm under now. I love my kids more than anything but raising 3 three and half year olds is pretty stressful and crazy at times. I am so moody ALL THE TIME, one week I'm up cleaning like crazy getting everything done with no help to the next week doing NOTHING literally not even giving myself or the kids a bath or going outside in the yard. It's all I can do all this week just to get them fed and stuck in front of tv. That sounds horrible but all I wanna do is sleep. I just haven't had the energy to do any of it. Thinking of getting up and cleaning makes me tired. My kids are suffering and I've been sitting around all day crying. All they want is me to play with them and today my little grl(my triplets are 2boys 1girl) came up to me and put her hand on my cheek and said "Mommy are you happy?" My answer......"no" she then kissed my cheek and asked me if I was happy now...how do I answer "no I'm not" and why didn't it make me happy???? I want to be WAY MORE involved but I'm gonna have to admit that something is up and this isn't normal. Now I just have to have enough guts to call someone tomorrow! They deserve it ........and maybe that will help me feel like I'm being a good enough mom. I never wanna have sex with my husband(who I LOVE) and we used to have a very healthy sex life before my kids....I have gained 60lbs in 4yrs..I scored a 41 on the depression test. Think I'm depressed?

Pathetic
Angel

hi angel, and welcome to pc!!! i am so glad you found us. sounds like you are in a very depressed state of mind. often ppl just don't stop to think of all the things a mom must do to keep the family running smoothly. sounds like you need some "angel time", otherwise known as grown up time with friends or just by yourself...out of the house i might add. lots of suggestions for you but first things first....i agree. i think you need to speak with a psychiatrist regarding your depression or a psychologist. if there's a need a psychiatrist can put you on meds to get your mood stabilized. it may be situational or it may be a condition. they can make that determination for you/with you. so i encourage you to do that asap. your weight gain is not helping your self esteem either. not to worry about that for right now. seek professional help and i feel things will improve. please keep us posted on how you are doing. it takes about 3 weeks for meds to kick in if that is what is needed. so stick close to us so we can help you along your way. you are important as an individual...you are of worth and value....even if you can't "see" that right now. stay in touch, k?

It really does sound like you are depressed. I am glad you are going to reach out and get some help. Because you deserve to be happy. It's so hard to reach out that first time...but it will get better.

I stared at the phone for five hours before I made the first call to my T/psych NP. I recommend not spending that long .... Of course being a triplet mommy you might get 5 whole minutes to call if you're lucky!

Thanks and I did make that call today. I have an appointment on 5-19 to see someone about this. I will probably be around here a good bit. It makes me feel not so alone just reading about others. I just feel like such a bad mom. I mean I wanted and prayed for these kids for 3+ years and they are here, healthy and happy but I'm miserable. I do get out alone which is what really worried me. My husband and I have almost no help so neither of us get that time because we feel bad about leaving te other here alone with the three kids. He gets more time than me though. I just feel so overwhelmed I have done NOTHING literally all week my house is a mess and stinks yet I sit here and look around and the thought of getting up to clean makes me want to crawl under the covers. It just confuses me because a week or so ago I had the house cleaned spotless, bathed the kids every night, cooked for us every night and took them outside for 2-3hrs everyday..this week I'm lucky to feed them three times and am LIVING for naptime and bedtime, we've stayed inside because I don't even wanna go outside. I just hope the 19th gets here and SOON!!!
Angel

You sound depressed to me, and also perfectly normal to feel so tired and overwhelmed having 3 year old triplets!!! I hope you make the phone call and ask for help. You need lots of help, some of it may be with depression - meds, therapy. Some may be very practical like getting help with the kids and housework and having time by yourself and time alone with your husband. Try and find all the resources you can to get all the different kinds of help you can. Don't be afraid to let family and friends know how you are feeling and asking them for some help also.

Oh honey that's depression with a capital D. Multiples can do that to ya, I have a set of twins that are 4 1/2yr old. It's a lot of work. A lot of people think stay at home mom's have it so easy, NOT! Spending every moment with people under 3ft tall is hard work. We need adult conversation!
Yes your children, husband and YOU deserve for you to be happy. It isn't shocking also that you have little or no sex drive right now. Sex takes energy and so do triples!!
You did the right thing, the first step is admitting theres a problem and now your going to see some one! ~yay~ Thats a step that many can't make....
Please be gentle with yourself and from one mom of multiples to another I'm here if you need a shoulder or just a rest.