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#1
Feb 23, 2009, 11:19 AM
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Just need someone to care.
I feel like I want to explode. Want to tear something up , destoy something, anything. But instead I am imploding. Taking all my rage and turning inside. I am a quiet person but today , actually for a long time, I am a raging maniac. On the inside. I can't sit still but i just want to crawl into a hole. I am not productive. I don't do anything but sit and then up and pace. i am a misfit. I never do anything right. I have been told all the things that I should be doing to help myself. Including not using the word "should". Have been going to therapy for almost six years. But I just waste it. Why don't I do what I need to do? I am such a waste of bone and flesh. I have a husband of 30 years who loves me with all his heart. He would do anything for me but he doesn't know what else to do for me. Its a bad day. |
 ADHD1956
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#2
Feb 23, 2009, 11:24 AM
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bad days happen sometimes ((lindy))) we care, sending hope
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| lindee, lonegael
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#3
Feb 23, 2009, 11:32 AM
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((((((( lindee )))))))
  I'm sorry you are struggling right now. Is there something that has triggered this today? Be gentle with you.
__________________
 Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
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#4
Feb 23, 2009, 11:44 AM
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Sorry you're having a bad day today, lindee. I care and am sending lots of hugs your way.
__________________
Rebecca "If you're going through hell -- keep going." - Winston Churchill It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection. - Elizabeth Gilbert Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong, we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on. Bring on the wonder, bring on the song, I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long. - Susan Enan http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/ |
| lindee
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#5
Feb 23, 2009, 11:50 AM
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Quote:
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#6
Feb 23, 2009, 12:00 PM
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(((((((((((( lindee ))))))))))))))))
Here are some hugs Does your T know how you are feeling?
__________________
 Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? Thought I was the only one." C.S. Lewis visit my blog at http://gimmeice.psychcentral.net |
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#7
Feb 23, 2009, 12:06 PM
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yeah she knows. I like her. Its not a problem with her. I just don't do what she tells me to do. :-( I'm pretty useless.
Thanks for your reply. there are so many good people on PC. I think I should get more involved here. |
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#8
Feb 23, 2009, 01:25 PM
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Quote:
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| lindee
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#9
Feb 23, 2009, 03:20 PM
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Quote:
If you are loved, you are not a waste of bone and flesh
__________________
 Yesterday I was so clever, so I want to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. |
| lindee
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#10
Feb 23, 2009, 04:46 PM
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I'm sorry you feel like this you have someone that cares for you. You are not a waste at all! We all have bad days. I hope you are feeling better.
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| lindee
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#11
Feb 23, 2009, 06:19 PM
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Hi Lindee, I care. Reading your letter made me want to immediately tell you so. I fully understand and can feel what you are going through. I am in the same boat; only I have been married for 34 years. I feel alone all the time. Sometimes I even want to get a divorce because he still doesn't understand the pain I am in. Yet, He takes care of everything & me. I am totally dependant on him and worry about what I would do if he left me. Wish I could be your neighbor because I have no friends. Being isolated and sad all the time isn't very attractive. Hope to talk again. Shaudy1 Quote:
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| lindee
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#12
Feb 23, 2009, 07:53 PM
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Quote:
I can't even remember how long I've been under going treatment. Those couple of "good days" that come along are way less than the number of "bad days". And yes we know all the things we are suppose to do and say on the "bad days". However, knowing and doing are miles apart when you are having a "bad day". But you are NOT a waste of bone and flesh. You are a person suffering with an illness that is so tricky it can destroy all the "good days". You are always welcome here Lindee
__________________
 kebs
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| lindee, lonegael
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#13
Jan 01, 2010, 10:10 AM
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__________________
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| lindee, lonegael
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#14
Jan 01, 2010, 01:44 PM
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(((((lindee)))))
I hope you feel better. |
| lindee
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#15
Jan 01, 2010, 06:59 PM
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 (((((((((((((((( lindee ))))))))))))))))
__________________
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| lindee
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#16
Jan 01, 2010, 07:24 PM
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i hope you feel better. i too have few friends and tend to be isolated.i hope we can work on that this new year 2010. happy new year and God bless!!!!
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| lindee
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#17
Jan 03, 2010, 07:19 PM
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__________________
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| lindee
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#18
Jan 03, 2010, 10:49 PM
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| lindee
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#19
Jan 05, 2010, 01:56 PM
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Quote:
__________________
coko 4 real
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#20
Jan 07, 2010, 05:04 AM
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__________________
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#21
Jan 07, 2010, 06:00 AM
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Hi, Lindee! When this thread first appeared I was new and timid to post. How goes it with you now?
__________________
My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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#22
Jan 07, 2010, 06:06 AM
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Sorry you're feeling so down on yourself Lindee. You are worth more then you realise. There are people around you that love you, please try and hold onto that truth instead of listening to the lies in your own mind. You are never a waste of bone and flesh. We are so often our own worst enemy and despite what we know is good for us, we take the alternate path of self destruction.
Have you talked about your feelings of rage with your T? I have frequent periods where I feel a rage inside that's directed at myself. It also feels like I'm going to implode. Maybe there are things that sub-consciously trigger these emotions. You could maybe explore this with your T? Please try to take of yourself and post when you feel alone and have these feelings. It's not good to keep it all inside. I've found it really does help to know that people on PC will be there to encourage and support. Even though we may no know you personally, we can empathise with you and genuinely do care.
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#23
Jan 07, 2010, 03:44 PM
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Lindee, I'm sorry you feel so lousy. I've been there so often...I know exactly how you feel! I, too, have a loving husband of 31 years who often feels so helpless when he cannot make me feel better. That's when I have to TELL myself how incredibly blessed I am! (even when it doesn't feel like it) When I look around and see people who seem to have it all and are totally unhappy. I remind myself that being loved by just one person---really loved---is being worthwhile. Hang on...you are loved!!!
__________________
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#24
Jan 07, 2010, 04:30 PM
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((((((((((((((((( lindee )))))))))))))))))))
__________________
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