[dogwood]

I'm scared. Terrified is more like it. I have not been able to snap out the funk no matter what I do.My pdoc and I agree I should not change any thing because I don't want side effects.Why do I have to choose between hells? I either take what works best for me and gain weight, or I take what I do and live with a degree of depression and mind racing.To make matters worse, our household has 3 other people in that also suffer from depression and they are all doing poorly too. My husband is unemployed and my other 2 sons are alcoholics. None of them can get their meds due to lack of insurance and the alcohol just feeds into their depression. i 'm at the point where I don't want to get out of bed, I cry alot, and just have to try EXTRA hard to even move.The only thing that motivates me is I'm scared for them. But I'm scared for me too. I don't know How much more stress I can take. I blew up today at me son. I NEVER do that.How doI stay focused and surmount this for myself and all ofus?

I do not think you should have to choose between two hells. Side effects are no fun, but hell is worse. My suggestion is to talk to a psychiatrist and get something that actually helps you.

[Mike_J]

Different drugs work differantly on differant people, you should (if only life really worked as it should) be able to find something that works for you without a ton of side effects. I agree with TheByzantine find a good phychiatrist that you trust (takes more than one visit for trust to kick in) and start looking for a medication to help you. Do you have a therapist? The reason I ask is that my therapist has helped me more than durgs ever have, but that has take a very long time.

[lonegael]

I aggre, Dogwood, although I can also understand about the sideeffects. Right now, the idea is going to sound scarier than the real sideeffects are likely to be, though they can be uncomfortable for some people. You will never know until you try, and you may have to try several different things. Please don't beat yourself up about blowing on your son. Both of you have problems that are hard for others to bear, as well as yourselves. take care of yourself, dear. HUggs.