Think my T hates me and doesn't want me to be her client

Having a lot of low self esteem today.
Hating myself pretty badly.
Feeling so paranoid that my T really wishes she never took me back as her client because all I do is disappoint her.
I suck!

{{{{{{{{{{{{sj0401}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}]
Low self esteem I'm sorry
Why hate yourself? When you've done nothing wrong!
I get paranoid too sometimes.
my T really wishes she never took me back as her client because all I do is disappoint her.
Did she actually say that to you?
I feel the same way with my T, that's why I'm going to quit therpy and stick to conselling.
You don't suck, depression sucks but not you!

My T has never said this...and I have told her I am sorry I am such a bother. She says I am not...but come on...do you think she is going to say she is sorry?
I know she cares.
I just wish I was more confident in myself and could get my stuff together and let her see I really need her.

Oh my gosh... I'm so sorry you are feeling this way... it's exactly how I'm feeling!! I couldn't believe it when I read your title!

I've been feeling my T. wants me to go away as I'm not interesting enough and disappoint him.

Do you have support at home, with family or friends? I find therapy extremely hard without any other support except for my T. I hope you have someone you can lean on for support-- and coming here is good. By posting you can find others that may feel similiar, --just not feeling all alone helps sometimes. I'm here with you and listening. I'm quite familiar with paranoid thoughts!

I'm sure you don't suck and there are many good things about you! t/c

Mandy

Susan,

Just your last line. . . I just wish I was more confident in myself and could get my stuff together and let her see I really need her.

If you could print that out and hand it to your T.

It simply says everything.

It is a perfect way to let your T see the struggle between your heart and head.

((((( HUGS )))))

Petunia

It's good to reasure yourself, she didn't say that to you.
Your not a bother, you don't follow her every day?
So seeing her a couple of times is not bothering.
She says I am not... then if she said that.
Do you not believe her or trust her?
That's a question.
Unless she knows what she has done wrong then she might say sorry...
confidents isn't easy but the more friendly faces you meet the more you feel confident in yourself.
If you really need her, have you tried telling her that.
As well can be a hard thing to say for your T.

Hate is such a stong word!

((((((((((((((((sj)))))))))))))))))
I am sorry you are in that space
Take care,
Fuzzy

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{sj}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
I am sure you T does not hate you....they are trained to handle just about anything....I encourage you to talk to your T about your feelings...believe me from experience it brings you closer yet.....trust her....
take care
thinking about you

I have known my T for a very long time. I just get very paranoid and never want to disappoint her.

After today I am going to take a break from the forums. I feel like I need to distance myself before I start to post things that are only bringing other people down or making them stir up feelings that begin to make them feel like me.
My time line is still in tact...less then 2 weeks for me to make my decision.
I thank everyone who has been my friend, support, guide and hugger here at this time.
I do hope to come back soon but do not know if I will.
I'm sorry my post here isn't more encouraging.
I have been contacting old friends IRL that I haven't spoken to for awhile to prepare for whatever may come.
Now I need to withdrawl from here.
May each of you find your reason to make it one more day...and may you pray that I find it soon.

Do you have a consellor instead?
Or pdoc who you like?
If you are unhappy talking to your T, then find someone else who will understand you and help you.
You don't have a time line, you have a guild line to stay safe, please.
If it will help you them take time away from the forums.
But if you still feel upset type everything and post it to us, I will take my time to read it all just for you.
You must come back because people will miss you.
Feel free to PM me but I'll be gone on hoilday to a different country for 7 days. But I will reply to it, promise.
I know what you are talking about.
I've felt that way and nearly made it.
But I've realised why not......
It's never a secret.
Are you on medication, if I might ask?
I'm on prozac sure helps me quite a lot.
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{sj0401}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

WRONG, Not a position to put us in and not a place to go. Call suicide hotline immediately. Youi can't just pull out and say the hang with it.