Hate Being Sick and Being a Client UGH

Just feeling so down today...so full of anxiety... I have been taking my meds and sleeping but wake back up to find the feelings are STILL THERE ugh...wish they would leave...I HATE being sick and being a client and having all these boundaries .......just makes me feel untouchable and sicker.........does not help me much more that is for sure.......
My mind is on my T today and what he is going through with his wife and my heart is full of anxiety of the fears of the UNKNOWNS....
WHY do I have to be sick in the head I do not want to be sick all I want is comfort from my T and NO cannot happen because I am a client A SICK client I just HATE it....UGH
thanks for listening to me sorry for rambling on and on about this but I am just having a hard time with these overwhelming feelings right now. I feel like they are SMOTHERING me........

i'm so sorry that you're having such a hard time now...please know that i'm thinking of you...pat

Hey there,
I know you are feeling like you are dying inside. On some level you feel a bit abandoned. I know the feeling well. My T is going away next Tues. to a conference in FL and will not be in for the rest of the week next week. I see her tonight but I don't even want to get into anything because I know she will not be able to be reached next week.
Your anxiety is normal. I know it hurts.
PM me if you want to privately talk.
Thinking of you!
Susan

Try looking at yourself as a consumer of mental health services, not a client. You pay for the services you recieve and if you are not getting what you want ask them what they can do better for you, granted we are the ones who must do the harder part but they must help
Angie

(((((((((((((((((((((((hope)))))))))))))))))))))

I am so sorry your feeling down. I'm gonna send some peaceful vibes your way.
<~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~peace

Yes what you described it me exactly but I feel really bad for saying that he abandoned me because he is with his wife having surgery for cancer and I know his family comes first but it HURTS so bad...........dieing on the inside YES that is it....boy I it feels good to know others know what I am feeling...that I am not selfish and not crazy and not SICK.......
My Physctrist has upped my meds for the next couple of weeks to help me with the anxiety. She told me I can talk to her while my T is away BUT NO WAY she is NOT one I can talk too NOT AT ALL ....she does NOT have good therapy side to her she is good for meds but that is it.
I guess I should be grateful because compared to most here I do have a pillow from his office and I do have a picture of him from when I was in the hospital last because in there they would not let me have the pillow so I got a picture to help me through. So right now I have them both...and I also have a tape of him reading bible verses so I can hear his voice....so what am I complaining about huh? I feel so SELFISH....
so sorry for complaining

Hey Hope,

I don't think you're selfish at all. You have finally found someone you can trust and opened up to him- he's helped you see so many things. Maybe you're just "feeling" so much that your not used to feeling, if you were like me- I used to shut feeling out until I started with my current T. Lately, I think I'm starting to feel some things.... I fear being vunerable admitting it though. I have major trust issues and have opened up for the first time to my current T.-- who I've been seeing for 1 year now-- he's my third therapist.

I think if I was in your place I would feel real similar--as it is, I conjure up ideas in my head that my T. is going to retire soon, or he's going to be too busy with lectures to see me. He's assured me many times that he is here to stay for a long time-- but I still find myself doubting-- so afraid to be abondened.

I hope your T. comes back real soon and his wife will be well. It must be so hard for you--- but you know-- you've taken a great step in reaching out here. I think you express how you're feeling very well--- I would like to get to that point! I'm sorry you're going through this... I know it's something that can't be helped... but that doesn't make it any easier.

Well, just wanted to let you know I'm here--- if you want to talk you can PM me anytime.

Wishing you well,

Mandy

(((((((((((((((((((Hope)))))))))))))))))))))

Just wantcha to know I'm here, reading, caring . . .

I'm thinking and praying for you. I know the feelings. It's the same for me. Everytime I think I'm getting past them... BLAM!!!!... they smack me in the face. Is it anything like that for you? Take care hun.

Ry