[donsallthere]

Quit sucessful 2 year job after developing fear of rejection within final 3 months of employment.

Completly isolated from former friends and relatives- stay in apartment 24/7 and watch t.v. or utube all waking hours.

Need job but afraid to look or answer Career Builder emails that offer jobs.

Feel I have nothing to contribute to anyone. Feel hopeless, helpless, zero motivation

Was for 40 year goal oriented, exceeding agressive, very sucessful in business.

Have tried former tools which motivated me, but now useless. Can't even immagin a mental picture of a better life.

Take medication, if not-you know what would happen.

Had therapy over 40 year period-worthless. Had many issues, still have them but my drive to be sucessful in business could not be stopped by other issues. Think sucess drive was anger based.

Therapy non affective because of BPD-too difficult and too much work for most therapists. Gee, I wish they would have told me after a couple of sessions instead of taking thousands of my dollars and never making even a 1% difference.

Probably also have some narciccistic characteristics.

Am I just being childish by acting helpless, hopeless-just have no more self-confidence.

Any insights, sugestions, incouragements welcomed.

[kaliope]

What I see from this post is a very insightful person so only you can answer the question as to whether you are "just being childish by acting helpless, hopeless" and why you would even pose that question to yourself.

It sounds like you have hit a big bump in the road and you are frustrated with your own behaviors and you want things to be different but you dont know where to start. What are some things that have worked in the past?

I can identify with hopelessness and isolation and lack of motivation. My pdoc has me doing little things like taking miniwalks just to get out. And I am talking miniwalks. Im not going far. Last about two minutes. Going to the grocer, if only for one thing. Having a meal with a coworker or my son to socialize. Very small things. I found a paint class I go to once or twice a month. I dont socialize there, keep to myself, but it gets me out and I do something I am proud of. Its hard to do these things, I just have to jump in and do it and I really do feel better having done them.

Good luck to you.

[SophiaG]

the thing is you sound functional, it was only your fear of rejection that made you run away from your job?

so, fight the fear and get another job?

[roads]

I'm confused since this post is in the first person, but in the profile I see "Here for a friend." It makes a difference.

Is there a therapist & psychiatrist current involved? Does this person live alone? Do people come & go in his life?

For what's told in the post, kaliope's description of what's worked certainly suggests a healthy-sounding approach for donsallthere. Can't help but wonder though whether some event didn't occur that relates to the fear of rejection linked to job resignation. Something seems missing.

I feel terrible for anyone who has suffered this long with nothing bringing even hope of improvement. Continuing to take the meds may actually be causing a worsening of the problems if it's not a currently-reviewed prescription.

I hope Don or someone close to him can arrange for a complete, professional evaluation if such has not been ongoing. If it has been, maybe a change of doctors/therapists is in order. My opinion only, of course, but no one should have the same treatment continued if it's not benefiting him.

[donsallthere]

Originally Posted by roadrunnerbeepbeep

I'm confused since this post is in the first person, but in the profile I see "Here for a friend." It makes a difference.

Is there a therapist & psychiatrist current involved? Does this person live alone? Do people come & go in his life?

For what's told in the post, kaliope's description of what's worked certainly suggests a healthy-sounding approach for donsallthere. Can't help but wonder though whether some event didn't occur that relates to the fear of rejection linked to job resignation. Something seems missing.

I feel terrible for anyone who has suffered this long with nothing bringing even hope of improvement. Continuing to take the meds may actually be causing a worsening of the problems if it's not a currently-reviewed prescription.

I hope Don or someone close to him can arrange for a complete, professional evaluation if such has not been ongoing. If it has been, maybe a change of doctors/therapists is in order. My opinion only, of course, but no one should have the same treatment continued if it's not benefiting him.

New at this, hope my reply is done correctly. Thank you very much for commenting on my post. I have now updated my profile. I have worked through the OCD problems, and ADD, so those medications I believe could be stopped. I did stop them once, but depression set in-I am positive if I had either a fulfilling job or close emotional relationship, something to engrose me, I would be a different person-sure of it!

[donsallthere]

New at this, hope my reply is done correctly. Thank you very much for commenting on my post. I have now updated my profile. I have worked through the OCD problems, and ADD, so those medications I believe could be stopped. I did stop them once, but depression set in-I am positive if I had either a fulfilling job or close emotional relationship, something to engrose me, I would be a different person-sure of it!

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, Donsallthere! Question (no need to answer): Were you involved in sales before this most recent job?

[roads]

Originally Posted by donsallthere

New at this, hope my reply is done correctly. ....
I am positive if I had either a fulfilling job or close emotional relationship, something to engrose me, I would be a different person-sure of it!

You're catching on fine.

Maybe you're right about the "either this or this ..." etc. But if you're bipolar, for example, those good things really won't make all the bad go away. I thought for years great jobs, prestige, money, love, etc would zap my depression. They didn't make a dent. The proper treatment (meds & therapy) helped immensely.

Please consider the possibility that you've not gotten the right treatment for you. I'd hate to see you in misery any longer than necessary.

I'm glad you're here & making contact with others. They're good people & will share generously.