Can't see myself ever getting better.

Well, the title pretty much says it all. Things just seem to be getting worse not better. I've been seeing a therapist for a year now, I take my meds and I have been putting in the work. I try doing all things "normal" people do to stay happy and nothing seems to work. I feel as though depression is just a part of my personality and is here to stay. Do I have a personality disorder of some sort? I really don't need anymore "issues" to deal with. I don't want to die but I just want all of this to go away. Everything seems to such a struggle; work, relationships, friendships etc. Does everyone find life this hard? What do regular people feel like? I don't even remember.

I have those same thoughts these days......I wonder how much of all of this is really rooted in and caused by our attitude?

i have the same feeling as you i just turned 15 and i see people who are 40 saying that its finally going good for them why do we get all of this i've had depression for 2 years and nothing is happy for me.

every time the depression gets better for a while, i know it's just a matter of time before it comes back. i am on 5 psych meds now for my depression and ocd. i feel that no one undrstands. what did i do to deserve this constant hell?

I having been going like that for a few years and it is so hard to deal with. If it was once and a while we may b able to cope but this day to day depression really sucks.

I have those same feelings all the time for a few years now and it SUCKS. no one seems to understand that its not my fault that i am not doing it on purpose it is just who I have become.

Thanks everyone for your support It is good to be reminded that I am not alone and many people feel the same way as I do. Hopefully one day all of us will be able to post our stories in the "Success Stories" part of the forum! Here's hoping.

Hi.

Just a little tip. Have you tried exercising at least 3 times a week? That can really make you feel better, and when you better good on the outside, you often feel more confident and energetic.

I do take my dog for a short walk most days but it is only a 15min walk and not very "energizing" nor is it enough to actually increase fitness. I know I should increase my exercise but I really can't be bothered most of the time. *sigh* It is summer where I am so perhaps I will start going swimming more often. Thank you for taking the time to respond! It is much appreciated

I was diagnosed clinically depressed when I was 8. At 63 (!), that was changed to bipolar.

Looking back, I can see that it was largely a 2-steps forward, 1-step back process most of my life. The meds got much better, & when I got on Cymbalta things improved greatly..

For me, though, part of the problem was my dx. Depression was only part of it. I was bipolar II, which meant I had episodes of hypomania that left me irratible, sometimes anxious, usually on the verge of anger. Until this was also attended to (meds + therapy), I didn't make a whole lot of short term progress that I was aware of at the time.

Looking back over the past 57 yrs? Oh, yes, I have gotten WAY better! & kudos to Severijn--exercise has been a huge part. That & sleep & a healthy diet--all important.

I tried to kill myself when I was 8. Have pursued alcoholism & some other slow suicide paths since, when I thought as you seem to be--that I'd never be better. I went off meds & quit therapy. Joke on me ... hee hee ... I'm still alive!

Now I stick with the therapy & endure med adjustments. I'm still on Cymbalta, which continues to anchor me.

I encourage all of you to work on patience & to journal, esp your moods. They are making so much progress with meds so much faster these days I think you guys have reason to hope. Make having the best T & the best pdoc for you a priority always!

If you wish, PM me--any of you, whenever. To some extent at least, I've been where you are. Yeah, it sux. Majorly.

Roadrunner