[Queen of Pentacles]

Hello. I am new on this site. I struggle constantly with depression and have stayed on meds since 1989. I am now in my mid-50s, female, dealing with menopausal hormonal issues, and taking generic fluoxetine. It has never worked as well for me as brand-name Prozac did, but I have not been able to get brand-name Prozac since the generics went on the market. Now, even the best of the generics has stopped working for me. Also, my doctor stopped taking my insurance, and I am having to wait about a month before I can get an appointment with a new doctor who takes my insurance. Meanwhile, I wake up every morning at 3:00 and can't go back to sleep. I just lie there, unable to sleep, and unable to turn off horrible thoughts. I cry a lot, and sometimes I'm crabby to my husband for no good reason. I am posting here in hopes of getting encouragement from those who have been though something similar. Thank you and best wishes to everybody.

[happy 2 b here]

Originally Posted by Queen of Pentacles

Hello. I am new on this site. I struggle constantly with depression and have stayed on meds since 1989. I am now in my mid-50s, female, dealing with menopausal hormonal issues, and taking generic fluoxetine. It has never worked as well for me as brand-name Prozac did, but I have not been able to get brand-name Prozac since the generics went on the market. Now, even the best of the generics has stopped working for me. Also, my doctor stopped taking my insurance, and I am having to wait about a month before I can get an appointment with a new doctor who takes my insurance. Meanwhile, I wake up every morning at 3:00 and can't go back to sleep. I just lie there, unable to sleep, and unable to turn off horrible thoughts. I cry a lot, and sometimes I'm crabby to my husband for no good reason. I am posting here in hopes of getting encouragement from those who have been though something similar. Thank you and best wishes to everybody.

Hi and welcome to PC

Dealing with depression, as well as going through menopause is no easy task. I found sleeping,and living with both of these, difficult, at times, that is for sure. I am 65, and have been on medication for depression, anxiety, etc., off and on for most of my adult life. At the moment, with my doctor's help, I am tapering off Effexor XR, as I have felt for some time, that it is not doing its job, anymore.

I did not have an easy time going through menopause, and like you mentioned, the hormones are all over the place, and that is bound to make you feel crabby -- there -- there is a good reason for you -- I know -- it doesn't help you much, as we do not like being that way with our mates. My husband has put up with a lot during 45 years of marriage -- chronic depression, panic attacks, social anxiety, and menopause -- and, he is still here -- and, I am so grateful.

I came to PC 3 1/2 months ago, looking for support and friendship in dealing with medication not working, perhaps looking for a different way to live with my mental health issues, and, perhaps, to also add my "2 cents worth" of life's experiences, as well

This is a very supportive website to belong to -- so friendly, so many others wanting to help with their experiences, or, perhaps just a hug or 2 -- also there are social clubs to join, once you have posted a few more messages -- i belong to the "over 55" club -- but there are so many that you may enjoy -- also, the chat rooms can be good for a great "pick me up", when needed -- so, hopefully, you will feel welcome and comfortable here. I was made to feel that way, right from the start, even with the "young'ns".

WELCOME!!!

[bharani1008]

Welcome to PC Queen of Pentacles. I have been on medication since my teens and I'm 63 now. Thank heavens they are discovering new ones all the time because for me it took many tries and combinations to get it right.It took 2 years this last time to get it right. I expect to be on medication for the rest of my life and that's OK. I can live with that better than I can live with the disease.
I used Valerian tea for sleeplessness. Melatonin helps also. For menopausal relief calcium and magnesium are essential. I used to get PMS so badly that I'd have emotional meltdowns each period. When someone turned me on the calcium I was astonished with the results. I took 3 grams of calcium 3 days before my period was expected and from that day I never suffered from PMS again. I didn't even have too keep taking large amounts of calcium. I took the normal dose and still did well. I had an easy menopause so I don't know if it will work for that but I think it's worth exploring. I would do some serious research because too much calcium can cause kidney stones.
I hope you feel better soon.

[Queen of Pentacles]

Originally Posted by happy 2 b here

Hi and welcome to PC

Dealing with depression, as well as going through menopause is no easy task. I found sleeping,and living with both of these, difficult, at times, that is for sure. I am 65, and have been on medication for depression, anxiety, etc., off and on for most of my adult life. At the moment, with my doctor's help, I am tapering off Effexor XR, as I have felt for some time, that it is not doing its job, anymore.

I did not have an easy time going through menopause, and like you mentioned, the hormones are all over the place, and that is bound to make you feel crabby -- there -- there is a good reason for you -- I know -- it doesn't help you much, as we do not like being that way with our mates. My husband has put up with a lot during 45 years of marriage -- chronic depression, panic attacks, social anxiety, and menopause -- and, he is still here -- and, I am so grateful.

I came to PC 3 1/2 months ago, looking for support and friendship in dealing with medication not working, perhaps looking for a different way to live with my mental health issues, and, perhaps, to also add my "2 cents worth" of life's experiences, as well

This is a very supportive website to belong to -- so friendly, so many others wanting to help with their experiences, or, perhaps just a hug or 2 -- also there are social clubs to join, once you have posted a few more messages -- i belong to the "over 55" club -- but there are so many that you may enjoy -- also, the chat rooms can be good for a great "pick me up", when needed -- so, hopefully, you will feel welcome and comfortable here. I was made to feel that way, right from the start, even with the "young'ns".

WELCOME!!!

Thank you for responding to my post. It would mean a lot to me to correspond with other women in the "over 55" category, who have a history similar to mine. I have struggled with depression, anxiety, and other emotional problems my whole life, and I have always been extremely sensitive to hormonal changes. I had terrible PMS during my reproductive years, and it got worse and worse as I approached menopause. Now, the bouts of horrible depression are not so predictable (they don't come right before a menstrual period, because I rarely have a menstrual period anymore). I never could take birth control pills because they made my mood problems worse. So, I assume that the hormonal changes associated with menopause are responsible for some of what I'm feeling now. Thank you for your support.

[Queen of Pentacles]

Originally Posted by bharani1008

Welcome to PC Queen of Pentacles. I have been on medication since my teens and I'm 63 now. Thank heavens they are discovering new ones all the time because for me it took many tries and combinations to get it right.It took 2 years this last time to get it right. I expect to be on medication for the rest of my life and that's OK. I can live with that better than I can live with the disease.
I used Valerian tea for sleeplessness. Melatonin helps also. For menopausal relief calcium and magnesium are essential. I used to get PMS so badly that I'd have emotional meltdowns each period. When someone turned me on the calcium I was astonished with the results. I took 3 grams of calcium 3 days before my period was expected and from that day I never suffered from PMS again. I didn't even have too keep taking large amounts of calcium. I took the normal dose and still did well. I had an easy menopause so I don't know if it will work for that but I think it's worth exploring. I would do some serious research because too much calcium can cause kidney stones.
I hope you feel better soon.

Thank you for responding to my post. I have tried Valerian and melatonin for my insomnia, with no result. I will start taking more calcium and magnesium, however; thanks for the tip. Like you, I had terrible PMS all during my reproductive years. It got worse and worse as I approached menopause, to the point where I was getting suicidal once a month. As my period approached, I would have 8 or 9 heavy sweats every night, soaking every nightgown I owned. As soon as I would start to fall into a deep sleep, I would wake up sweating. I would get up, change my sopping nightgown, and go back to bed, only to repeat the cycle all night long. I was more tired in the morning than I was when I went to bed. I had to do laundry every day --- a basket full of wet nightgowns, plus at least two sets of wet sheets. This would go on until my period arrived, after which I could finally sleep. Then I would have a couple of weeks of relative normality until the whole thing started over again. The lack of sleep made me depressed and psychotic. It was horrible. Now I rarely have a period anymore, and I rarely have the night sweats anymore. I just can't sleep. I lie there, not sleeping, and my brain is flooded with bad thoughts about old age and decrepitude. I feel like there is nothing left to look forward to and I wish I could just die. It gets better in the daytime. Clearly, I need new meds, but it is going to be a while before I can get an appointment with a doctor who takes my insurance. It would mean a lot to me to correspond with other women in my age group who have had similar experiences and are coping. Bless you.

I have read that the only difference between prescribed Prozac and the generic form is
that the fillers are different. Maybe increasing your prescription dosage would give you
a greater amount of the pure product which might offset any fillers. It's worth asking
about, in my view.

Sorry you're having to go through all this; I hope you'll feel better soon with better
medication. Your psychiatrist needs to know all this, and you might think about
talking to a gynecologist about supplementing hormones to help you through these
stages of change.

[happy 2 b here]

Originally Posted by Queen of Pentacles

Hello. I am new on this site. I struggle constantly with depression and have stayed on meds since 1989. I am now in my mid-50s, female, dealing with menopausal hormonal issues, and taking generic fluoxetine. It has never worked as well for me as brand-name Prozac did, but I have not been able to get brand-name Prozac since the generics went on the market. Now, even the best of the generics has stopped working for me. Also, my doctor stopped taking my insurance, and I am having to wait about a month before I can get an appointment with a new doctor who takes my insurance. Meanwhile, I wake up every morning at 3:00 and can't go back to sleep. I just lie there, unable to sleep, and unable to turn off horrible thoughts. I cry a lot, and sometimes I'm crabby to my husband for no good reason. I am posting here in hopes of getting encouragement from those who have been though something similar. Thank you and best wishes to everybody.

Good to see you online tonight -- hope you will be happy with the friends you find here and the info/support that comes with it. Hope to see you in the "55 club"

[Rose76]

((((Queen)))) I see so much of my own experience in your words. My heart goes out to you. The waking up at 3 a.m. could be a combination of the depression, menopause, and just getting older. I never in my life experienced mid-night awakening until I got into my mid 50's. Now, I have come to believe that I will never again in my life sleep for more than 5 hours at a time. (Often it's less than that.) I so miss the depths of rest that I used to experience when I was young.

I totally relate to your saying that you feel there is nothing to look forward to. This is not totally a product of age. As I'm sure you know, there are women much older than we are who do look ahead with hope. I think there is something about hitting the mid-50's to early 60's that is especially hard for people with chronic depression. Let's hope it gets easier a bit further down the line. I am 60. I've had about 3 years of things seeming just awful. Sorry I can't offer you a story with a more hopeful ending.

I think that family structure can have a lot to do with it. Do you have children and grandchildren? I don't. I never before regretted that. Lately, though, I am feeling bereft. Of course, there is no revisiting that decision now. Contact with people/family who love you is very important.

Our husbands, or partners, are not enough because we know that we may outlive them. With my S/O being 17 years older than me, I fully expect to be left alone. That anticipation gets hard. I've tried to cultivate closer relations with relatives. Do you have much family that you could turn to? One of the surprising things that I've been glad to learn is that, as people get older, they tend to yearn more for the company of others their own age. I'm finding that relatives my age who do have kids and grandkids are becoming less involved with them and having more time for me. I try to nurture those contacts.

I hope your distress eases. I know it is awfully hard.

[Queen of Pentacles]

Thank you for your words of support, Rose. Like you, I chose not to have any children. I did not get married until two years ago, and my husband is ten years older than I am. He has grown kids and grand-kids. My sister has a 13-year old daughter, so I have a niece. I try to be a positive role model for her, and for my step-grand-daughters. Going for a walk now --- exercise nearly always helps my mood. Hope you have a good day.

[avlady]

I am 53 years old, sufferred from PMS my whole life, until i had a thermal ablation operation to stop my periods. I still suffer from the affects of menopause, but no periods is great. I hope you can get some relief about falling asleep, i wake up sometimes alot at night still, not as often.

[Queen of Pentacles]

Thanks for your input. I go months without a period, then, I'll have one again. I had one last month, and this month, the way I feel, I might have one again (I feel like I have really, really bad PMS). I just wish this menopause thing would be OVER. I feel like crying all the time, I can't sleep. It is good to be in contact with some people who understand.

[AV747]

Tablets clean only the consequences. Possible you hormonal failure due to menopause and this is the cause of depression. you should contact a professional who correctly selects hormones for you. Everything else is just dangerous to your health. Good luck! Take care of yourself!