Good vs Bad - (feelings)

good job sharing with your spouse! Way to start. Hang on Dear one, Hang on tight.

yeah rhaps,I didnt think anything wrong with your thread and was looking for it to see how its going,maybe you could send a pm to the mods and ask why.hope you better today,going to chat room soon.

whatever is bothering you...you do need to talk about it...give it a try...!!!!

I'm not sure where your thread was or what it was about, because I'm pretty new, but I DO know about depression & hopelessness. When I'm depressed I find I ruminate on past traumatic events & think only negative thoughts. I've learned to try to look at the positive things in my life & try to enjoy small things in the moment--a strong cup of coffee, the sunshine on my face, reading a novel or something humorous (like David Sedaris--sp?--I was in a treatment facility for bipolar depression & was reading a book of his & started laughing out loud. I'd been crying non-stop for days huddled in the corner).

I tried the suicide thing in my teens & 20's (quit when I had kids due to the effect of my mother's suicide on me), but ended up in the ER a month ago with an overdose--don't think it was a suicide attempt--just wanted to get rid of the pain. But I talked to my therapist, meds provider & realized I really want to live & I've go to work hard at making my life joyful & meaningful & I'm going to do it, despite setbacks. I'm learning from all my "episodes" to change my environment to avoid stress, get rid of unhealthy relationships, & try to build my self-esteem so I don't rely so much on my husband's opinion of me to determine my self-worth. When I'm depressed, even a glance from him can be interpreted by me as a scornful look & I go from there to his being embarrased by me, hating me, etc. I jump to all sorts of conclusions--negative, of course.

Anyway, know that there are a lot of us who care for you & can empathize with your pain. Keep reaching out to us & let us know what we can do to help.--Suzy

suzy,I hear you about the rehashing negative and painful memories and am glad to hear you're going with the positives to come out of it,me too,I'm not going to let the demons win any longer.all the best mate,and to you to rhaps.take care ppl.

Yay Rhapsody taking the step to talk to your husband (mine has selective hearing when I try but eventually we get around to it lol).
Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you (((hugs)))

Rhapsody hope you are feeling better!! I, too, didn't see your thread...but I can tell you were very upset...(((hugs)))

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Bethsway said:
Rhapsody hope you are feeling better!! I, too, didn't see your thread...but I can tell you were very upset...(((hugs)))

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Thank YOU for the concern.....
and YES I was upset and very distraught, but having my PC buddies to talk it out with really helped.... I usually have to go through this kind of upset once every four weeks (during my periods - I have PMDD) and with it being mixed with my mental illness I can some times loose track of me being in this world.... IF I need too I will be back again to vent about what ever it is that has me upset during my mean & evil cycle. Cheers! - here is to the wonders of womanhood, NOT - lol.

Thanks...
LoVe,
Rhapsody -

This is what I took away (with me) from the suicide link that DocJohn supplied in Depression....

(1.) That's what suicide is really about -- not having the ability to cope anymore with the amount of pain that you're feeling. You just can't deal with it anymore. You feel overwhelmed and hopeless. Lost. You are at the end of your rope and your coping resources have just run out. That leaves you with three choices: commit suicide, reduce your pain, or increase your coping resources.

(2.) Just because you feel the pain doesn't mean you have to act on it today. Take a day to consider that the pain you are feeling right now is going to be just a little less intense one week from today, and even less intense one month from today. For most people, they won't even remember the intensity of the pain and feelings they experienced while contemplating suicide a year from that very same date.

(3.) That's what I've tried to do here, help you understand that suicide is a temporary feeling of wanting to do something to stop all the pain, to stop the anguish, to stop the misery in your life. But these things -- pain, anguish, and misery -- they are all feelings. Relief from those feelings will come anyway, whether you choose to die or not. You don't really have a choice about that. You will feel better eventually, whether you want to or not. Because not even the kind of pain you're feeling right now is permanent (no matter how much it feels like it will never end). It will end.

* * * * * * * * * *

LINK: http://areason.org/

Wise words (((Rhapsody)))

I saw your thread. I missed it last week. I hope today is better Rhap. I am sorry you are feeling so lousy. That is one awful place to be. I hate it when it is happening to me. Lots of love coming your way.

Thanks Froggie.....

I too am sad when this happens to me for I am often left feeling like I would rather die than to be here in emotional pain and without love..... and then the week passes and my period is over and then that darn dreaded evil PMDD is over I am glad that I did not actual take my life and that my husband is still around and that he still loves me with all my biological ups and downs.

I PRAY for the day that my PMDD is gone forever..... maybe Menopause will actually be a blessing to ME?

LoVe,
Rhapsody -

(((((((((((( Rhapsody )))))))))))))

PMDD is a ******, all you have to look forward to is the next time! I used to go through hell and back each month untill my doc gave me a miracle! It's called merena. I won't say what it does or how it works here... if you haven't heard from it you can search it on the net or I'll pm the details to you.

It really worked for... a lot! I can't even tell when it's supposed to be, it's completely gone except for the odd, but manageble cramp now and then...

I saw your first post. I do know how that feels I felt the same way last week. And the only person I talked to was my huband and he can only be so much help. So hang in there and if you need to talk email ok. Tracie

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TanyaGrave said:
I used to go through hell and back each month untill my doc gave me a miracle! It's called merena.

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Isn't that some sort of birth control? - I cannot take any kind of birth control due to medical problems with them.

Rhapsody -

Yes it is, I couldn't use birth control either because I have a very little chance to conceive as it is and it makes me very depressed. This is a device that is inserted and it holds for five years. The hormone levels of this is the lowest yet and the bonus is you don't get your period at all... Anytime you want to remove it, you just pull the string... that's it! No pills, no hassles, no nothing!