[StarStrike]

Today my dad told me he to meet him at my grandparents house because he had bought me a gift from Cornwall where he had gone on holiday for a week. It was a trap and I fell in it. Granted, he had gotten me some fudge and shortbread. But was it worth being left feeling crushed inside? No... His fiance came along too. She mocked the coat I was wearing, remarking that it's ten sizes too big. Even though it's my favourite coat and it's perfectly fit for it's purpose of keeping me dry when it rains. Then they ganged up on me. They want me to move into a flat on my own and leave my brother homeless. It hurt me so much to think that they would try to pressure me into abandoning my brother who does everything for me. He is literally the definition of a carer. But no... They only see bad in him. I feel like crying my eyes out. This isn't fair. I don't want to move. I haven't even lived in this flat for a year and they want me to abandon him when I cannot even take care of myself.

[PoorPrincess]

So far okay today, no challenges yet to deal with other than nothing really left
to eat in the house. That is a challenge.

[Nammu]

Been sitting in the dark in the bedroom picking out songs for my funeral....then find out it's Mother's Day, and the guilt strikes. Just not a good day all around.

Need to get out of this hospital...!

[PoorPrincess]

Anxiety rearing it's pointed little head throughout my system today.
Why I don't know, as I'm just half watching movies on tv and playing on ipad.
Heck, I'm not even reading news feeds online, which kick up my heart rate and adrenaline.

[TheOriginalMe]

More of the same health issues, this is getting tedious, roll on the menopause when the bleeding will stop for good, bladder also playing up too. I have had enough of all this. No builders today (Sunday) but no usable bathroom either. I spent an hour or so outside in the wind and fresh air but it didn't do much for my spirits I think my slow progress has just revised downwards to no progress, back to square one with all the same problems I had 3 months ago. I don't even have the energy right now to hate my life.

[PoorPrincess]

Low key as usual, steady, mood okay but anxiety gripped me out of nowhere, with no
particular thoughts going on to trigger it.
Geeeesh, between devastating depression, annihilating anhedonia, and inappropriate anxiety, where do we stand a chance? I'm too old for this #}*%.

A "nothing much" kind of a day. I had a long weekend as I took last Friday off. But I took Friday off because of a doctor's (regular medical) appointment. It was a preliminary check up. I plan to have a urine/blood sample on Monday. I took it easy today because of that coming up.

I felt very bored today. Just took a little walk today and that's it. Saturday was a disappointing kind of a day for me as I went to a seminar. I left it early because I got bored with it and had things to do. And then last night I went to the pool area to relax, but some drunks came in and ruined it for me. And then I watched a movie that was not very hot.

[Rose76]

Fairly good day.

[signets]

I was doing o.k. today. Mostly in bed all day. Spent time with daughter part of the time. I was just kind of tired and exhausted from yesterday. Had a panic attack at Costco just getting into a parking space!! and Then while in the store, feeling so worn out. I was with my mom, she said I looked so tired. I wasn't doing anything to exhaust me. My daughter was trying to make me feel better by doing some silly things kids would do. When I got home, I fell into a deep depression and just took a nap. I am up tonight finishing grades for the close of school. I really don't want to go in tomorrow dealing with rude and lazy students who don't mind.

[tigersassy]

Depression hit full force last night. I don't want to be at work today. Would much rather be in bed under the covers crying. May is a horrible month.

Tig

[regretful]

Still wishing for something other than my self-imposed misery...Each morning I get out of bed and begin thinking about the arrival at my office I think only about what mind-numbing and boring nonsense that I have to deal with, and the depression gets another shot at being the prevailing feeling in my mind for yet another day. Situational, existential depression at its worst...

[eggplantlife]

Realized yesterday that my suicidal thoughts and depression was the worst last week because of PMS. I thought it was over. Didn't have restful sleep so not doing well this morning.

Doing okay right now I guess. Husband is on staycation this week. Soon we will walk to the dogs, go to an AA meeting together, then out to lunch. But the depression, my old friend, persists . . .

[PoorPrincess]

Awoke to the grip of dread and worry, the same insolvable puzzle going over in my mind.
As well now physical malaise seems to have become my daily companion. It's just wrong.

[StarStrike]

I had trouble falling asleep last night. My family issues were buzzing around in my mind when I wanted sleep. So I started pacing around the room in the dark. I almost fell over my computer chair. I got back into bed. Started drifting off around half one. Woke up ten minutes before my alarm clock was set to go off. I wish I could fast forward to tomorrow. Maybe it'll be a better day.

[regretful]

Originally Posted by StarStrike

Maybe it'll be a better day.

I have this thought upon awakening each day...

[mulan]

I feel so tired. It's ten o clock in here. Really big day. Spent almost my entire day, like about seven hours in doctor appointments...as a student. My back were hurting terribly.
Beside that, in the mean time I had a two hours class.

Today was a day I felt very insecure, like I was jumping from an high altitude without a parashout. It's more a less like this how I feel when I interact with new people, or people I don't usualy interact with and I don't feel safe talking with. They were in fact very nice to me (the ones who talk to me) talking to me like I was someone. Calling my name just to tease me or say something random. From one point of view it's a good thing, but it's such a rush!!
And there is this guy I kind have a crush on...I never talked to him many times, today I did, few few time, but I guess it was the most long conversation we had, and I really think is very nice...I didn't felt nervous.
I guess I talk alot about how I interact to people. I've been felt really lost, without a friendship net. I rely my self, the most I can, on those people I knew from previous years. But I'm getting to understand that I would fit so much better with this people that came to my class this year. I really, really, really want to be friend with some of them, they are much more like me than the people that were in my class the previous three years. Today, for instance, someone told to my old classmates, "you are always talking about that. Don't you know any other thing to talk about?"
Thank you, exactly! I thought to myself, they are always having second intentions conversations, about people from the opposite sex, if you know what I mean.
Maybe I'm not one of the few people that thinks that friendships and fun can come from different things.

[JustTvTroping]

I'm surprised that I still feel ok. It's been about two days now and I'm still feeling fine. I can't say that I have hopes that this will stay for more than two weeks though: it's happened before. And having a highly emotional and sensitive roommate doesn't make it any better (I'm not used to being surrounded by such emotionally fueled atmosphere, even though it's been almost a year). I have about seven weeks left before moving out, but I know that something else will happen. Until then, all I have is my music and my walking to help the tolerance, taking the edge off even when I'm just walking to the nearest fast food place.

[Bigmike727]

Well today has went quite well for me. Just the pressure of national exams starting this Wednesday is starting to get to me.

[TheOriginalMe]

Knackered. Still no bath. Forgot to take meds - bladder irritation cleared up straight away and bleeding far less intense - hmmmm I think we may have cause and effect here. The problem is that every single a/d I've tried in my whole life has irritated my bladder, so what next?

I feel stupid. Convinced them I was fine. Out the hospital too early. Not fine.

[PoorPrincess]

I guess it's an okay and not okay day with me.
Had to deal with some hard stuff re: bureaucracy, its people & systems that don't work.
What's good is that I've handled it well. Maybe I'm just too worn out to care anymore?

[Pikku Myy]

Put me out of my misery now...

[wickedlovely1]

Hi I'm wickedlovely1 I'm new here I'm looking for some friends that can understand my diagnoses I'm manic depressive,bipolar axis 2,suffer social anxiety and general as well. Suffer panic attacks on a daily basis but I need friends and info,so I'm here

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