Afraid of PC

I don't know what it is about me... but whenever I feel like I'm comfortable with something, it soon turns into fear. I felt okay coming to PC, sharing how I felt and reading others feelings as well, but in the last week or so I couldn't bring myself to come here... not to read or share. I couldn't even type the name in the address bar. Since it's 3 a.m. right now, I'm a little delusional since I can't sleep, and I guess it doesn't bother me so much to come here and post for the moment. My depression was on hiatus for a couple of days, then it hit pretty hard a couple of days ago. I think I"m just gonna try and wait this one out, instead of trying to pick myself up like I usually do. Also, my OCD has gone out of control lately. I can't stop counting and touching things. Earlier, I had to quickly leave my computer for a second and I didn't get the chance to touch the center of the mouse before I left and it was killing me until I got back (I guess that's a topic for another forum though). I guess the feeling is catching up to me again, since my face is now a thousand degrees, I have a weak feeling in my stomach, and I have a headache coming on.

Welcome back

I am the "late nite bandit" here at PC. If you ever need to chat I'm here just about every day.

Peace to You.

-breezer

Thanks for the quick replies fayerody and breezer. Also, thanks for the late night chat offer... I may need that sometimes.
to you to fayerody!

Hello I am sorry you are havinga rough time at this time. Are you seeing a therapist, you may need a medication adjustment at this time to help you function on a better and more stable manner. I am concerned since you said that you were becoming delusional. I feel that you need to call your therapist or Dr if you have one so that they can help you during this time. I am also going to leave you a hotline number to call in case you are up at night and ned someone to talk to in person. 1-800-273-TALK. In any emergency circumstance you should always call your Dr to let them know you are in crisis(any time of hte day) or go to the local Emergency Room in your area. I hope things get better for you soon Take cae Sincerely Soidhonia

Oh Anony,
I'm sorry you are in such tormoil.
I am glad though that you decided to come back to us.
We are here for you.
Post and let us know what you are feelig.
Hugs,
Linda

((((((((((((((((((((((((((Anony)))))))))))))))))))))))

Thanks for the replies Soidhonia and Boopers. I appreciate the hotline number Soidhonia. I've never called one, but I'm not currently seeing a therapist and that number may be of use to me in the future. My PC anxiety has lessened somewhat since I last posted: I feel okay coming here and posting/reading now. Thanks everyone for your support when I needed it!
Also, thanks for the hugs Boopers!

Hi, anony.

It sounds like your anxiety is sooooo high right now. I'm sorry. Are you in therapy, or receiving meds, to attempt to find some relief?

I understand what you're saying. When I first came here a couple, three years ago, I did the same things after I'd "told" some things. Afterward, I felt them too telling and it sent my anxiety through the roof for a bit. Each time it took a couple of days to realize that I wasn't being judged harshly, picked apart, or anything of that nature then I'd tiptoe back in. After a while of this, my brain learned that it was safer here for me on that level. Now, there were a couple of things that I decided it wasn't good for me to post about and feel ok so I stopped doing that, and it's been pretty much ok since then.

I hope you find relief soon because you're wanted here and appreciated for who you are.

KD

I have been wondering a bit of the same things. I was on all the time awhile back and then couldn't. I have wondered if it is because as we open up and are vulnerable it gets scarier. Just a thought.

Thanks for the replies kimmydawn and froggie2. I think part of the reason I had felt this way was the same as you kimmydawn. I felt that I had posted some things about me that were too revealing as well. I do believe it is a little scary when we first open up and are vulnerable, froggie2. I'm slowly accepting the fact that it is ok to open up here.

You are very welcome for the hugs and here are some more!!

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