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  #26  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 06:26 AM
eggplantlife eggplantlife is offline
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May it be a good day. I noticed I get really bad when I work at this place. I'm not complaining about job. It's just below what I can do and I feel like a loser but it gives me money and way to go outside...be thankful for that. May I be at peace today and everything is going to be okay.
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  #27  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 07:18 AM
eggplantlife eggplantlife is offline
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I miss my sister dearly. She's not talking to me. I miss her a lot. I hope one day she will forgive me and love me back.
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  #28  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 07:26 AM
glok glok is offline
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Today thus far is a repetition of so many unremarkable others. Definitely could be worse.
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Thanks for this!
Bark, Pikku Myy
  #29  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 07:50 AM
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Pikku Myy Pikku Myy is offline
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Still holding on to the happy blanket Hoping it will last a bit longer!
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Bark, dandylin, eggplantlife, tigerlily84
  #30  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 08:04 AM
dandylin dandylin is offline
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Anxiety through the ceiling. I wish that when I'm like this that I could talk about it or explain it. I can't. I am overwhelmed and having a hard time getting cooperation from the people around me. If people around me are stressed, I soak that up.
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I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
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  #31  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 09:52 AM
regretful regretful is offline
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Deeply depressed; feeling like everything that I have ever done in my life has led to this, and I feel that if God was to talk to me, he'd say "why did you waste all of your opportunity?". I'm just a mess, and if I'm not anxious, then I'm depressed and vice-versa. I can't take much more of this...
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  #32  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 09:55 AM
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MysteryMade MysteryMade is offline
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Member Since: May 2014
Location: Washington
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I feel amazing.
And tired.
And physically exhausted.
Writing does this to a person, I've learned, when one has the passion to be an author. Once that story idea hits, and sticks... I become nothing more than a conduit for its power.
Sure does feel amazing to create again, though.
__________________
And I loves you too.

"But the mind can not fool itself for long. At last it has to admit that it has learned some very frightening things, some very confusing things, but that it is still ignorant, too, and needs to learn a lot more." - T. M. Wright
Thanks for this!
Bark, Pikku Myy, regretful
  #33  
Old Jul 16, 2014, 08:16 PM
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bronzeowl bronzeowl is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2011
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My eyes hurt from crying too much.

My head hurts from thinking too much.

My chest hurts from feeling too much.

Isolation hurts. Down, down, down.

No ups to report whatsoever.
__________________
Love is..
a baby smiling at you for the first time
a dog curling up by your side...
and your soulmate kissing your forehead
when he thinks you're sound asleep




OSFED|MDD/PPD|GAD|gender dysphoria|AvPD
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  #34  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 03:12 AM
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TheOriginalMe TheOriginalMe is offline
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Hot weather and celtic genes and hormones - meh - a really bad combination. I'll have to cover up completely or stay indoors to avoid sunburn and short of standing in a cold shower all day there's not much I can do about feeling got and bothered.

Otherwise I'm up and dressed before 9am a few weeks ago I wouldn't have been motivated to do that and I have several ideas of how to occupy myself today. Again that is a positive sign.
Thanks for this!
Bark, lizzyjb, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84, tigersassy
  #35  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 08:14 AM
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birdpumpkin birdpumpkin is offline
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Location: West Virginia
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Finally getting therapy. About darn time!! Getting registered today - doubt they'll do much else. Taking my husband's last 4 check stubs - hoping to get free to low-cost. My parents said they'd help if I have to pay. Only thing is - I'm scared of driving far from home and have to go alone. I don't drive to this town often. It's pretty busy, and I'm not even sure where the therapy place is. So I'm pretty scared. Woke up scared. Just seems to be something every day... =P
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"My life was ecstasy." - Henry David Thoreau
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Bark
  #36  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 08:30 AM
regretful regretful is offline
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On the continuum of depression, which might run from mild to severe, I'd have to say that I'm severe, but without any thoughts of ending it all or anything like that...
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  #37  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 10:19 AM
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tokiwartooth tokiwartooth is offline
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I found out he's resigning and his last day will be on Sept. 7th. I am devastated. I am more devastated than when my father died. I know he'll be staying in the area, but I don't know if he'll continue to go to our church. If he did, I might be ok. I've got a date tonight, hopefully I can take my mind off of it for awhile. I don't feel like I'm going to be able to give any relationship my all though because I love him. I want him, not another relationship, not another guy who might take my mind off of him for awhile. Well, truth is that nothing will take my mind off of him. No matter what.
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  #38  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 05:51 PM
NoIdeaWhatToDo NoIdeaWhatToDo is offline
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On the emotional roller coaster, vacillating between rage, despondent and resigned/helpless. And scared...just want to run away and hide from everyone and everything.
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  #39  
Old Jul 17, 2014, 11:16 PM
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bronzeowl bronzeowl is offline
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Feeling better than last night, so there's that.

Spent the better part of the night crying. But... I made it. So, that's something.
__________________
Love is..
a baby smiling at you for the first time
a dog curling up by your side...
and your soulmate kissing your forehead
when he thinks you're sound asleep




OSFED|MDD/PPD|GAD|gender dysphoria|AvPD
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Thanks for this!
Pikku Myy
  #40  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 09:12 AM
regretful regretful is offline
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Well, I've been depressed before, and I know the feeling all too well...I'm here in the throes of it..again. Is my life going to go on like this forever? It seems like such a waste. I feel like a failure...
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Bark, Pikku Myy, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
  #41  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 09:20 AM
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Pikku Myy Pikku Myy is offline
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Still hugging on to my happy blanket and trying my best not to let anything bring me down. Good here this morning.
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Bark, tigerlily84
  #42  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 09:23 AM
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lizzyjb lizzyjb is offline
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Location: Madrid
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Firts appointment with my new t. How different of my last t.
Had a large chat. I was so comfortable talking to him and working. Really great .
So hope about future.
Thanks for this!
Bark, Pikku Myy, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
  #43  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 09:38 AM
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tokiwartooth tokiwartooth is offline
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I was feeling bad already, and then I ended up watching Lemonhope Part 2 from the show Adventure Time, and the ending where PB sings the song. That might be a cartoon, but that was extremely sad. It's a very deep and meaningful show if you have ever watched it and followed the storylines. But that episode, it reminded me of the way I felt when I first watched the Futurama episode Jurassic Bark. Please for the love of god, if you have never seen Jurassic Bark and you are feeling depressed, don't watch it. I was happier the first time I saw it and I was like seriously, wtf did I just watch. Right in the feels, man.
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  #44  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 09:38 AM
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birdpumpkin birdpumpkin is offline
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Location: West Virginia
Posts: 297
Feeling really sad today. Missing my kitties really bad. Seems so many things setting off memories this morning.
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"My life was ecstasy." - Henry David Thoreau
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Bark, Pikku Myy, regretful, TheOriginalMe, tokiwartooth
  #45  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 11:55 AM
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herethennow herethennow is offline
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omg been some time since i've been here. hope everyone has been okay

school has been busy. essays due, many things to read, and i have other commitments on top of that. sometimes part of me just wants to flip over and run away.. but i trudge on anyway.

had a few stressors which led to crying spells and sui thoughts. but overall okay. hanging in there.... just that i think im overworking myself at the moment. ohwell.
__________________
"The is no better exercise for the human heart than reaching and lifting others up." - John Holmes

herethennow: This ward is a prison!
Wardmate: No.. here's not a prison. *points to brain* Here is.
dx: recurrent MDD.
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Thanks for this!
Bark, Pikku Myy, tigerlily84
  #46  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 12:05 PM
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oliamble oliamble is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: San Francisco
Posts: 123
Have a great weekend everyone and keep up the good spirit and a positive mood :-)
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oliamble - anything is possible if you set your heart, mind and soul to it, I mean anything.
Thanks for this!
Bark, lizzyjb, TheOriginalMe, tigerlily84
  #47  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 02:35 PM
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healingme4me healingme4me is offline
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Location: New England
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See....bypassed keeping track of my sa, anniversary on july 14th...and i wonder why i get emotional same time...what is that 24 years...
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  #48  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 04:22 PM
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Bark Bark is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2008
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Slept way too much. Made me feel worse. Irritable today. Hoping I feel better tomorrow.
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  #49  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 05:15 PM
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TheOriginalMe TheOriginalMe is offline
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Location: England
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Feeling a bit sorry for myself, not depressed sorry just "why me?" self indulgent sorry. I'm fed up of being alone but I have trust issues so being alone is safest for me. Catch 22. I'll get over it.
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Bark, tigerlily84
  #50  
Old Jul 18, 2014, 05:24 PM
glok glok is offline
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The quite usual half bubble off center.
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Bark, tigerlily84
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