Nothing to look forward to in life

Hello all,

I'm posting this in the Depression sub forum since I think this is what it might be. For a while now I've felt that I have nothing to look forward to in life. To sum up my "story":

- Always felt that if I worked hard I could have a happy life (good job, girlfriend/wife, maybe children some day when I'm older etc.)
- Worked hard, developed very strong but unreciprocated feelings for someone
- That someone is doing better than me in life now despite my having worked hard all this time

When I look at the future I see nothing to look forward to. I try to picture "positive" things that could happen but I a) don't believe that they actually will and b) that even if some things happen that other people might call "positive" they won't make me happy.

I feel like my life is pointless and I'm worthless. A friend of mine has suggested I seek treatment but the process of getting that paid for is very complex where I live. I also don't think that treatment could help me and don't really want it either.

I've been increasingly honest with my family about how I feel about my life and some of the things I say worry them (I'll leave it at that as per the rules).

I'm not sure why I'm posting here as I know no solution can be offered (it doesn't exist). Maybe I'm just looking for attention or sympathy.

I was hopeless sounding like this for a long period of my life. I finally reached the critical point of knowing I was going to be dead if I didn't do something different. that's when I seriously addressed meds and therapy and it was like the magic wand I had wanted all those years had hit me over the head. my life completely changed for the better. I couldn't believe the difference. I regret not taking that route sooner. just my experience. take care

If its any consolation I feel similar, except still trying really hard not to say to much and worry people....I know the feeling, don't know the solution though.

As Hellion said; I know the feeling yet I don't know the solution.

You definitely aren't alone. As the others posted above, I feel a lot the same way. But I would suggest trying to find a way to pay for and seek therapy, it can help so much just to be able to say out loud to someone what's on your mind. Especially someone who won't judge what you say at all.

But then again that's what we're here for. So spout off anytime. I'm listening and there's no judging here.

I feel the same way about treatment but I don't tell my family for that reason. Since I feel gone and unreachable I don't want to frustrate them with what I see as an unsolvable problem. There was a time when I thought they could help me and I made no secret of my condition, but that ship has long sailed. So just curious, why do you tell your family?

I have told my family everything. My parents are very supportive. My sister too. My brothers and the in laws shy away from the topic. For twenty five years I was 2500 miles away from them so even though they knew they did not see it. I have always been in treatment on my own but my parents will kick me in the butt to go back to the clinic when I see absolutely no point in it and it does help. I don't burden them anymore with the day to day stuff because it is hard on them. They are part of my support network though.

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I don't know why I told them. I know that it hurts them and makes them worried. Maybe it's a cry for help? Maybe I just want someone to talk to?

What frustrates me is how unfair it all seems. She has no interest in me because I have nothing to offer. I understand that, I don't like myself very much either but seeing her do better than me in life (moving abroad while I still live in the town I graduated high school) really hurts.

It's not so much that I don't want her to have a happy life (I don't mean anyone harm) it's that deep down I feel like if I keep working hard I might end up with a very mediocre life at best and that happiness is just not in the cards for me.

I think it's getting to the point where the people who know how I feel don't want anything to do with me anymore because I'm starting to sound like a broken record with my negative thoughts and feelings. I keep getting told to do something about it and that it's all up to me but that is a lie.

I'll continue to function (go to school etc) as best as I can because I don't want to end up homeless etc. but no action I can take (and I mean none) will make her want me. I was told that there are other women out there but I'm not an attractive person (looks and personality wise) and I don't want to be hurt this way again by being rejected. Plus I think being with someone cause you couldn't be with the person you really wanted to be with in the first place is a terrible thing to do as you're using someone as a "second best" solution.

Maybe it's for the best if the few friends I have keep their distance. I don't want to drag anyone down with me. If I am doing that here please go ahead and delete this thread, I don't want to be a burden to anyone already dealing with problems of their own.

There is no just one right person. Cuz something could always happen and the survivor has to figure out how to move on and carry on. Thats what a person needs to be able to do at any age. Thats what i keep telling myself anyway.