[Wishfulthinking19]

I need help. I've been suffering from depression since I was 10, undiagnosed until I was 14 with MDD. Suffered and probably still suffering from ptsd and ppd. I could"deal" with it up until now, I'm 30y/o, and now it's affecting the people I love... Mainly my husband. He doesn't understand the illness nor does he know how to help me. I'm at a loss. I've seen therapists, currently we a psychotherapist, do Tai chi, play soccer, work full time, etc… I know we all going go on. I think I need to know others go through the same. I don't want to die, but I don't know how to live without suffering. Any support would be great

[PaulGauguin]

Hi Wishful
I am not where you are but I am where your husband is. My wife suffers from depression and my son suffers from depression and anxiety greatly. It takes its toll on them but also on other family members, it is consuming at times. I have come to realize that they need a partner in their fight. They need someone who can encourage and understand. I have seen it reduce people I love, people that are necessary in my life - as your life is to your family's.
I am learning about depression and helping where I can. I realize I cannot make them do the things they must do on their own, but I can do my best to clear a path for them so that they can. In a very real sense, I am trying to rid myself of this misery as well. It sounds like you are taking some positive steps. Hopefully your husband takes part in your therapy, it can be insightful and more knowledge is always helpful. If he's like me he'll make a boatload of mistakes along the way. I guess that's part of it too. I hope this helps in some way.

Paul

[vital]

Originally Posted by Wishfulthinking19

I need help. I've been suffering from depression since I was 10, undiagnosed until I was 14 with MDD. Suffered and probably still suffering from ptsd and ppd. I could"deal" with it up until now, I'm 30y/o, and now it's affecting the people I love... Mainly my husband. He doesn't understand the illness nor does he know how to help me. I'm at a loss. I've seen therapists, currently we a psychotherapist, do Tai chi, play soccer, work full time, etc… I know we all going go on. I think I need to know others go through the same. I don't want to die, but I don't know how to live without suffering. Any support would be great

Hi Wishfulthinking,

I was like that. Slowly sinking even though I was doing lots of positive things. I had a breakthrough when I realized what was actually happening in my head and what to do about it. Have a look as this might work for you too:

http://egg.bu.edu/~youssef/SNAP_CLUB...0164151576.pdf

Here's what I think is the best overall plan including checking for medical and/or nutritional issues:

http://forums.psychcentral.com/4262681-post105.html

- vital

[wa(o)rrior]

Hi Friend

i know how it feels when you try so many things but still can't get out of the miserable feeling. our mind wants to get out of the feeling and it keeps on searching for even more resources that may be available. you think and think and it goes on and on like a vicious loop. this struggle will eventually tire you brain and you will feel exhausted.

just accept that you are doing things to take care of it like therapy, tai chi, ect. trust they can bring you relief from your miserable state. if you start questioning if they are working then you start the thinking process again which is going to bring you down.

please understand its because of brain chemicals not secreting enough. so stop battering yourself as it makes things worse. practice gratitude. connect with nature it always heals you. take a walk and enjoy the breeze, watch birds flying, see the beautiful flowers. watch a comedy and laugh yourself to tears.