Life is what YOU make it!

How do you view life? What ways can you improve your life?

I view life as a nice but rough challenge yet it is totally worth the battle. I refuse to give up on life because I have a bright future a head of me and I'm willing to enjoy every moment.

That's an interesting question. ... I view life by the 4 agreements.... at least I try to. But right now my view is changing.

What brought you to this board?

Pain brought me to PC. Pain from depression. I see life as a struggle. One to overcome. I see trying to make the best out of what I am given. Enjoying moments as they come.

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The question 'how do you view life' is very different to 'how do you view your life'. I am thinking that you meant more the latter.

The title of your thread has some truth in it. We have some ability to change ourselves and therefore life is what we make it. But there are considerable limitations. We have some choice of how we react to what happens to us and the circumstances we find ourselves in. We have some ability to shape our futures and change ourselves. But I would strongly suggest that this has its limits and that many of the people here have suffered abuse and pain NOT of our making and that on top of that we have impairments from genetics and biology that are affecting us in such a way that we have gathered at this board. In short we are suffering a great deal and are struggling to make anything out of our lives. This is not from lack of will or lack of trying. This is only my opinion. I also believe we are very limited in our ability to change others and extremely limited in our abiltiy to change society itself.

That leaves your other question what can i do to improve my life. I need to get out of depression. And then start to address the mess I have made. Op i do not know if you have had severe, crippling, suicidal depression. But not only is it incredibly difficult to endure it can, and I find usually does, leave your life in tatters. what i find happening is that i effectively pick up a shovel and start digging a hole. And there I am standing in that hole. I keep digging. The light fades in my eyes and as i go deeper the difficulty of me ever climbing out becomes more apparent. Occasionally someone shines a lantern down my hole and what I see is hope. Hope that i can climb out one day and do something with my life.

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I view life as mostly very real forms of pain coupled with a few, largely superficial distractions from that fact.

Hi lovejoy,

Thanks. That's a wonderful healthy thought!

I try to always be improving after having got over depression. My latest thing I'm really committed to is yoga (especially breathing - "pranayama"). My latest experiment is probiotic sauerkraut if you can believe it! What are you doing to improve your life?

- vital

While thinking that we have the power to change our lives is liberating, I think that our life is the result of many factors, including our own decisions and will. But, on the other hand, I think it is wise to recognize that we are born with some conditioning and that also environment influences our lives and that sometimes it works in ways we cannot control. That is why I love the serenity prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The courage to change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.

I am keen to see an answer to this question as well. Thanks for posting that Blues47.

Generally people are usually depressed or they are not. Whilst it is good to see depressed people express hope I think it is also rare to express it so emphatically because depressed people are not optimistic.

On the other hand you don't normally see people that are not depressed come to such a forum. You also do not see the non depressed or those that have succeeded in beating depression forever spend significant time on forums for depressed people. I am afraid I have to admit I view such people with deep suspicion. Why stay here? To lecture us arrogantly on how to escape? Or do they have an agenda? Did they ever have severe depression at all?

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What ways can I improve my life?.. You are kidding, right? Well...hummmm I've suffered through toxic medication for over 30-years not one of which offers any relief anymore, 30-years of weekly psychologist appointments, 34-years of abstinence from drugs & alcohol, Neurofeedback, Reiki, Yoga, acupuncture, inpatient & outpatient psychiatric care, 30 HOURS of TMS, Electroconvulsant ECT treatments and....KETAMINE.... still, I struggle each day to simply exist. Currently, I have intensive outpatient treatment three days a week, psychotherapy weekly, psychiatric appointments monthly, evening groups on Tuesday AND A.A. Meetings. Oh and... I'm dealing with pancreatic cancer and Parkinson's.

So, what "ways do I improve my life?" The only way I see to "improve" my life at this point is to compassionately let death relieve me of my suffering. Your question insinuates that I have created this hell called depression and with a simple "choice" I can feel better? Please tell me... How DO I improve my life?

I wonder if anyone stuck in a severe depression has ever managed to get inspired by the topic title.
For me personally it just adds to the self hate and hopelessness. I screwed up. I made so many mistakes in life. I'm not working hard enough to get better. I failed, I'm a failure. I'm not strong enough to get out of this. I'm doing everything wrong.

Not helpful.

^Exactly. It is because many people that have not had depression cannot understand that speeches and inspiring stories and youtube clips do absolutely nothing for the severely depressed except perhaps make them worse by thinking about what they missed out on in life. These people, having never suffered severe depression, honestly think that you stay depressed by surrounding yourself with gloom. Just get up, start doing things and making decisions and think positive thoughts! If only it were that easy ... Go back and have a closer look at the evidence.

It does depend a bit on the type of depression. Non-melancholic can often be cheered up to some degree. As well in atypical depression the person can be cheered up by good news etc. Even though the bulk of people have non-melancholic depression most of us here would have chronic depression and be of the melancholic type. That explains why the thread did not get a good response.

Doesbeing a existential nihilist say anything about how I see life?

Of course I bounce from that to the belief that while I may not be able to do anything long lasting maybe I can ease the suffering for some people. But then life kicks me square in the testicles and I go back to the nihilistic belief set.

Understanding mental illnesses and uplift anyone who is going through tough times.

I've learned to live in the moment! It feels great because I used to be so hard on myself previously but now, I'm have no complaints. Exercising and having a clean dieting helps. I'm taking control of my live with God on my side.

ETA : I'm happy that you're doing well! Kudos to you.

For starters, change the way you view your situation. Be thankful that you're even alive! PM me if you really want to discuss ways to overcome your situation. I have faith that everything will work out in due time. You simply misunderstood my statement and question. I'm not insinuating that you "created this hell called depression ". I'm insinuating that you CAN see the light at the end of the tunnel if you choose to. I do apologize that you're going through so much.

I see that you took my post personal and you have the right to but that wasn't my intent. I'm only trying to shed positivity on here to give people hope, like you. I think changing your prospective may help you see where I'm coming from.

You're not the only one who has made mistakes. You're human just like we all are. You LEARN from your mistakes and screw ups. You're being hard on yourself when you said "I'm not working hard enough to get better". You're not a failure. You're a survivor who's trying to overcome this battle. I don't know what exactly you're doing but you're on this forum for a reason so you're trying to help yourself. That itself is doing something right! =D

You may be on to something but I'm willing to challenge your prospective on a healthy level. Yes, those who are severely depressed may not become happy after hearing "speeches, inspiring stories, and YouTube clips" but eventually, you go on to help yourself somehow, someway like being on this forum, going to your pdoc, tdoc, and going to cognitive behavioral therapy. I may not be able to relate to you with your struggles but I'm willing to bet that you want to live to see another and be happy. Don't we all want to be happy with life? I do. Don't you? I'm not a victim of my circumstances; I'm a fighter...so are you! =D

Now, we can agree to disagree and that is fine. I enjoy talking and helping people.

I did not take your post personal at all, I am simply telling you what the effect of so called "inspirational quotes" is on people who are depressed.

I bloody well know I need to change my perspective, thank you. But that is easier said than done. Frankly if years and years of therapy hasn't helped, do you think some cheery stranger on a forum who doesn't understand the first thing about depression is going to change anything?

It's great that you want to help people. But as I said and as other people have pointed out as well, this isn't the way. "Be thankful that you're even alive!" why? I never asked to be alive. Life is nothing but a struggle. Why should I be thankful for that?
"I'm insinuating that you CAN see the light at the end of the tunnel if you choose to" That's still saying this person chose NOT to see the light. Blaming them for their situation.
I'm sorry, but nothing about what you wrote is uplifting.

Ok. Thank you for posting your prospective.

When a person is in the pits of depression, and that is what it is like, it is like a "black hole", there is no way they can pep talk themselves out of it, cheer themselves up, or see the "bright side," A very depressed person has difficulty finding hope. Sometimes it is all a depressed person can do to just get out of bed in the morning. It is not as simple as just changing one's attitude. Every depressed person on this board would choose happiness and contentment if they were able to.

I have struggled with depression for two years now. Prior to that I had times off and on during my adult life when I struggled with depression. Bad circumstances one after another fueled my depression. I know I am better off than many people, however, that is such a small comfort.

I have read self-help books, and currently in therapy and on anti-depressants. Life is a struggle when one is dealing with depression. I am beginning to find the best thing for me is to learn self-acceptance, pray a whole lot, and try new paths in life. Self-acceptance, I think might be a path to peace, which is the best that I can probably hope for.

Everyone is different. What helps one person may or may not help another. My hope and prayers is that we all find that peace and hope.

Do you think you are spreading joy to depressed people with this?
This is just, like, taunting people in wheelchairs.

I think depression is hard for people to understand if they have not lived in it. People have empathy, sympathy, and consideration for a person in a wheelchair, and we all should give that wheelchair bound person love. But depression and mental illness is also a harsh disease, but it is a disease that cannot be seen. Therefore we often get misunderstanding rather that sympathy or empathy, if this makes any sense.

I am curious about where you are getting your information from. You admit no personal experience. And you would not have posted here if you had no interest in the topic of depression and mental health. So what website, books, youtube etc are you using to learn about depression?

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"perspective" not "prospective". That clinched my non-buy-in.