[xx_tpm-life_xx]

So many things are going on lately and I don't know what to do... I'm really suicidal, everything ticks me... My anxiety is so much worse.. I need a new psychologist I think... I think I need meds??!! I want to do things I've never done before like smoke and I don't know...

[dexter]

Hello TPM just want to offer a little understanding and support. Your post is full of your desire to get help. Please try one of the support hotlines in this forum, I've had some mixed success with crisischat.org (really good if I can get through but sometimes there's a wait) and maybe that can put you on the path for a new doctor or some new therapy or whatever you might need.

Can you call your old psychiatrist for some help or are they not helping you?

In the meantime keep posting here... We can help by listening and understanding to help you hold on until you can find some help in your life.

[elevatedsoul]

how long has it been going on?

if you are feeling you are going to suicide you should get emergency help...
go to the hospital emergency room and tell them ... i know how it feels...
but we dont want that to happen to you...

if you are having suicidal ideation, i think alot of us here have that...
just thinking about it, not really planning anything... well not really wanting to do it but cant shake the thoughts...
talking a little can help... talking with a good therapist can help a great deal...

medication could help especially combined with therapy... im in the process of finding new psychiatrist to get on meds again... im just not gonna get on 9 different pills again - sometimes too much can make things worse too...

i love the benzos for the anxiety - especially if you just use it for short term...
klonopin / valium ... they last longer than the xanax and ativan...

does your psychologist know whats going on?

again please if you feel you might act on those thoughts go to the emergency room now...

if you cant talk to anyone else then please talk here - i try to read the forums everyday...

[EnglishDave]

Do arrange to see a new Psychologist asap, feeling this Low is an emergency situation and if you cannot access a Psychologist do please phone a Crisis Line or, if you are in fear of harm, get your parents involved and get to the ER immediately. If you feel stable enough and want to expand on what issues are causing this crisis, we are here to listen.

Please do not be drawn into behaviours or habits that are out of character, thinking they are going to help. Every single one comes with negative effects which are amplified in those of us whe have issues. Smoking really is a disgusting habit, carcinogenic, expensive, addictive, stinking and not cool. Yes, I am an ex-smoker and having had Cancer twice, I regret every cigarette I ever had. Just remember, only do what you would be comfortable having your whole family know you do.

Dave.

[xx_tpm-life_xx]

Originally Posted by dexter

Hello TPM just want to offer a little understanding and support. Your post is full of your desire to get help. Please try one of the support hotlines in this forum, I've had some mixed success with crisischat.org (really good if I can get through but sometimes there's a wait) and maybe that can put you on the path for a new doctor or some new therapy or whatever you might need.

Can you call your old psychiatrist for some help or are they not helping you?

In the meantime keep posting here... We can help by listening and understanding to help you hold on until you can find some help in your life.

Okay! Thank you! And my psychologist I saw today but is no help

[xx_tpm-life_xx]

Originally Posted by elevatedsoul

how long has it been going on?

if you are feeling you are going to suicide you should get emergency help...
go to the hospital emergency room and tell them ... i know how it feels...
but we dont want that to happen to you...

if you are having suicidal ideation, i think alot of us here have that...
just thinking about it, not really planning anything... well not really wanting to do it but cant shake the thoughts...
talking a little can help... talking with a good therapist can help a great deal...

medication could help especially combined with therapy... im in the process of finding new psychiatrist to get on meds again... im just not gonna get on 9 different pills again - sometimes too much can make things worse too...

i love the benzos for the anxiety - especially if you just use it for short term...
klonopin / valium ... they last longer than the xanax and ativan...

does your psychologist know whats going on?

again please if you feel you might act on those thoughts go to the emergency room now...

if you cant talk to anyone else then please talk here - i try to read the forums everyday...

It's been goin on for a while.. I wont suicide, but I think about it way too often and yea.. Thank you so much THO!

[xx_tpm-life_xx]

Originally Posted by EnglishDave

Do arrange to see a new Psychologist asap, feeling this Low is an emergency situation and if you cannot access a Psychologist do please phone a Crisis Line or, if you are in fear of harm, get your parents involved and get to the ER immediately. If you feel stable enough and want to expand on what issues are causing this crisis, we are here to listen.

Please do not be drawn into behaviours or habits that are out of character, thinking they are going to help. Every single one comes with negative effects which are amplified in those of us whe have issues. Smoking really is a disgusting habit, carcinogenic, expensive, addictive, stinking and not cool. Yes, I am an ex-smoker and having had Cancer twice, I regret every cigarette I ever had. Just remember, only do what you would be comfortable having your whole family know you do.

Dave.

Thanks Dave! I really appericate it, and mostly Bc my aunt passed and she was really close to me and im just having really bad depression and anxiety lately:/

[elevatedsoul]

well if you want or ever need to let off some steam - can do it here

definitely know how ya feel , we're in it together in a manner of speaking..

i dont talk to anyone about whats going on with me - dont have a therapist or anything...
so occasionally i come here and ramble on about whatever going through my mind...
even though it makes me feel bad to write about it, think maybe it helps a little...
kind of like having atleast some outlet to release some of it...

i would definitely say get a new psych if the one you have been seeing doesnt seem to be helping... maybe a psychiatrist instead ? he can do the medications for you, and you maybe can get a therapist to talk to about things and help you work through things going on?

thing about meds is they can help, but what happened to me is i ended up on a handful .. and im not on any of them now (besides the wellbutrin) but looking back its kinda like a blur, i dont remember much of that time i was on those meds... because they are pretty strong... i was taking 3-4 antipsychotics together.. like 3 antidepressants... mood stabilizer... stuff for sleep and nausea...

its easy to become over medicated... and that can be ok for short term maybe but when it turns into years i think its too long to be on so many meds for my condition... need to do the therapy and try to work through it ... if you have psychosis though antipsychotics probably would be much better help... i dont have psychotic features though...

the seroquel seemed to help with depression though, it just didnt let me be very happy either... the rest of the meds just made me forget what was going on...
seroquel will knock you out cold when you first start it though... took me around a year before my body adjusted - and i could actually take it without going to sleep at all... but i have alot of problems with insomnia (periodically)

stay strong, you have friends here .. keep fighting to get well, you know..
has to be a way we can have atleast a little joy and happiness..

[EnglishDave]

If you ever feel the need to articulate how you feel about your Aunt's passing, please PM me. I understand how difficult a subject it is, and how difficult loss is to deal with. I am no Therapist, but I have lived through it.

Dave.

Often, your GP can offer some medication if you find yourself in the position of scheduling issues with a psychiatrist (say, you can't get appointment with one for 6 weeks.)

So sorry for you loss!

[elevatedsoul]

im trying to deal with a GP now... i have already been diagnosed so she doesnt have to try to diagnose me or anything - just want her to give me my meds... but she doesnt want to give me anything but the wellbutrin... i've tried so many of them i know what i want... know more than her about it really :/

i think the place i go to though is under heavy surveillance for controlled substances though... must be like an audit thing?
so maybe thats why she wont give me the meds

maybe you have better luck at your GP

but you must be really careful starting meds... especially if you already are suicidal... or having suicidal ideations....
sometimes starting meds in the beginning can make it worse... just have to pay extra attention to yourself when starting them ok?
at any sign it seems to be getting worse call the doctor immediately...
that way a professional can tell you what to do... if what they say doesnt make sense then i dunno, call 911 ?
maybe someone else know what to really do?

here a few excerpts from an article here: 10 Signs Your Antidepressant Isn't Working - Depression Center - Everyday Health

4. You feel a sudden surge of energy — along with the blues. “If you feel more physical energy after starting an antidepressant, but you still have depression, that’s good and bad news,” says Gabriela Cora, MD, MBA, a psychiatrist in Miami. “It means the depression medication is starting to work, but not in the right way." She says that increased physical energy combined with depression is a bad combination that can make you act out or increase your risk for suicide. “So report these symptoms to your doctor right away,” urges Cora.

7. Your depression gets deeper. “If your depression symptoms get worse as soon as you start taking an antidepressant, or they get better and then very suddenly get worse, it’s a sign that the depression medication isn’t working properly, and you should see your health care professional right away,” Hullett says. Specific warning signs to look out for include feeling agitated or restless, pacing or constant movement, hand wringing, or feeling generally out of control.

9. You’re having violent mood swings. “Depression medications can sometimes cause mood swings, especially in people who have a tendency toward bipolar disorder — depression and mania,” Hullett says. If you feel unusually elated or you become very terse with your spouse, break furniture, or have an uncharacteristic bout of road rage, you probably need to change your antidepressant, he advises.

im not saying it will happen to you - you may feel better quickly after starting them too - i just want you to be aware... it can happen that it gets worse and thats just a reaction to the medication... but since you are in a fragile state i want you to be safe - so please take care

from the above quotes basicly what could happen is - the depression gets worse - increasing suicidal tenancies... the depression is flipped because of the antidepressant into mania which mean you have bipolar... or you get a fast placebo affect

medication can really help, i just believe in being educated if you are going to take medication...
i dont mean read all of the side effects!! because that can be a bad thing too
but i think they give you pamplets with the medication that tells all of that stuff...

anyway - adhd on... i will stop rambling, maybe you should give the gp a shot - gp might can even give you referals

[xx_tpm-life_xx]

Originally Posted by elevatedsoul

im trying to deal with a GP now... i have already been diagnosed so she doesnt have to try to diagnose me or anything - just want her to give me my meds... but she doesnt want to give me anything but the wellbutrin... i've tried so many of them i know what i want... know more than her about it really :/

i think the place i go to though is under heavy surveillance for controlled substances though... must be like an audit thing?
so maybe thats why she wont give me the meds

maybe you have better luck at your GP

but you must be really careful starting meds... especially if you already are suicidal... or having suicidal ideations....
sometimes starting meds in the beginning can make it worse... just have to pay extra attention to yourself when starting them ok?
at any sign it seems to be getting worse call the doctor immediately...
that way a professional can tell you what to do... if what they say doesnt make sense then i dunno, call 911 ?
maybe someone else know what to really do?

here a few excerpts from an article here: 10 Signs Your Antidepressant Isn't Working - Depression Center - Everyday Health






im not saying it will happen to you - you may feel better quickly after starting them too - i just want you to be aware... it can happen that it gets worse and thats just a reaction to the medication... but since you are in a fragile state i want you to be safe - so please take care

from the above quotes basicly what could happen is - the depression gets worse - increasing suicidal tenancies... the depression is flipped because of the antidepressant into mania which mean you have bipolar... or you get a fast placebo affect

medication can really help, i just believe in being educated if you are going to take medication...
i dont mean read all of the side effects!! because that can be a bad thing too
but i think they give you pamplets with the medication that tells all of that stuff...

anyway - adhd on... i will stop rambling, maybe you should give the gp a shot - gp might can even give you referals

Thank you so much, oh my goodness!! Thank you, it really means so much!!!