What are you thinking/feeling right now?

It will all come out because I will not stop until it does. Then who will have egg on their face(s)? Do you think I will care?? No! I won't care after all these people left me to cry every day/night. Left me to suffer without any concern for my well being. I can't begin to say what they put me through.

Getting a T was just another big mistake in my life. Other people can see a T and get help. I only get screwed and more problems than I ever imagined.

whether I should have a pear or not,whether I should get into relgious argument with this guy.

Extremely depressed and don't know what I want to do anymore.

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Rubbish. I've got a partner, a family, a great job and yet I am lonely and sad. I feel guilty about everything. There's all these people with nothing that I have that are happy and grateful and here I am wallowing in a pit of self pity and self loathing. I push everyone away and I know I'm doing it but can't stop myself. Think I need to go back on meds but don't want to. Rambling and rushing thoughts

Ok. Move over. I'm in the same boat.
On the outside I have a wonderful life. Really it's what most want.
Inside I've never felt more alone & depressed. It's an absolutely horrible way to exist!!
Why am I like this?

This sounds like me too
My cave is warm and inviting (sometimes )

Confused and stressed and happy at the same time idk i swear i can't even keep one emotion for more than an hour

being depressed most of my life,not wanting any more medicine,almost no interest left in this "sh....t" world,no friends,no one special by my side for i do not even remember when was the las time i had a gf.. boring job and most importantly,,Coping with my desires and thoughts about leaving this world sooner better than later..i can tell that my time is coming,,,,every single time i suffer a crisis,,,is getting more and more difficult to overcome it...
i have even joined a special site where people can discuss freely "stuff"and this one maybe probably as one of my last hopes especially wishing to find people who might give some advice regarding your impulses,suicidal thought and how you Cope with those feelings...
one more thing...i am 44 and feeling how big a failure I am as person,no light and hopes,just waiting for the day,Honestly,,the day D that allows me to have courage enough and say goodbye,,
Obviously i have a very extremely tiny hope that keeps me here and i really do not why and what that hope can be...
If there is at least one of you who goes through a very dangerous time like me ,please,please,,,i would love to hear from you....in particular from those
who just like me is not on meds and do not wanna hear about hospitals..
sorry,,,,maybe this is a big message...i do not know..This is my first post ever ,,

I'm so sorry you're going through that. That's just awful!! I hope you are feeling better. Well, I don't have any advice just that if you get the funds to pay for the vehicle the bank will usually let you catch up pay some fees for the towing, and some other crap and let you take it back. It costs more for them to sell it in auction and sue you for the deficiency. those are business/legal bills they don't want to pay since they're operating on a loss. I have more info to give but it parlays into bankruptcy ... not sure if you want that.

of course if they sell the car at a higher price than the outstanding amount, fess, etc. they cut you a check. I saw that happen once.

Oh goodness where did you read that? I remember in my 1st round of depression I researched depression to no end. I ran across this video by this endronologist at Stanford who did a college lecture on it:

I'm sure you've seen a million things, and its very academic but the way he breaks it all down.... its a neurological, physiological, psychological disease.. but you know, unless you go through it like we all have people just conclude it's a choice, whatever.

What happened that made it worse, if you don't mind me asking?

Eat the pear, it's sweet. Avoid the argument, it'll make you bitter.

I feel great im studying my dna.

wish I could visit you there fuzzy. We could make s'mores and drink big mugs of hot cocoa

Feeling numb is ideal , I wish I could feel that. anything to avoid pain and sadness.

I guess it's about being on top in every sense.

I think you should keep posting. I've gone through 2 bouts of depression, I'm on my 3rd right now...& this really is a lifeline. people here are here to support, others to vent, others offer good advice. I didn't have anyone to talk to , people just don't understand us, we fall down harder than others and get up slower than others. but we are still here. I feel like depression has bled all over my brain, I hate the world for being this way and for not finding happiness, is that how you feel? what is the hope that you're hanging to?

I don't know that I have felt specifically the way you do, but i did wish several times that I wanted just to get hit by a bus. I just didn't and don't care. I'm not in meds either, I wish I could medicate

I'm sorry . I'm so sorry that you feel this way, but you're not alone. we're all walking around with depression trying to swallow us whole .

I think you should keep posting, try depression forums.org too (or 7 cups? it was recommended to me, but I haven tried it. I'd rather write than chat) I've gone through 2 bouts of depression, I'm on my 3rd right now...& this really is a lifeline. people here are here to support, others to vent, others offer good advice. I didn't have anyone to talk to , people just don't understand us, we fall down harder than others and get up slower than others. but we are still here. I feel like depression has bled all over my brain, I hate the world for being this way and for not finding happiness, is that how you feel? what is the hope that you're hanging to?

I don't know that I have felt specifically the way you do, but i did wish several times that I wanted just to get hit by a bus. I just didn't and don't care.

I'm sorry . I'm so sorry that you feel this way, but you're not alone. we're all walking around with depression trying to swallow us whole .

I don't and never will define self or others as a "failure" - doing so would make me closer to a "loser" than the Light in life would wish....

But ahhhh "coping" with the wish to no longer be on this planet is no "fun"
(Understatement? )

I am getting a bit hungry, thinking if I should go out for lunch/dinner. I think I will. Get up and go have my favorite ravioli. I also need to pick up milk for my cereal.

A lot of "truth" in this, sadly

(I'm hoping my body will return to where it came from soon also )

Peace
Fuzzy

Kinda Bored, no one is really is posting anything new. Kinda Lonely here on PC here tonight