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#1
Jun 12, 2017, 01:16 PM
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When I'm depressed, I often feel guilty for smiling or laughing. Someone will say something funny, I'll laugh, and then immediately feel guilty for laughing.
Like I'm supposed to be depressed and feeling anything different is wrong. It almost feels morally wrong. It's like I'm cheating myself of my depression by having the nerve to laugh. I'm supposed to be depressed! Anyone else ever feel this way?
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bipolar II lithium, Tegretol, perphenazine (Trilafon), Cymbalta, lorazepam My blog: https://bipolarmark.wordpress.com/ |
 *Laurie*, elevatedsoul, IrisBloom, lotusblossom19, MickeyCheeky, Skeezyks, Sunflower123, Turtle_Rider
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 *Laurie*, QueenCopper
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#2
Jun 12, 2017, 01:28 PM
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 I bet a lot of people feel like this. I believe it's one of the effects of depression. You feel like you don't deserve to be happy in your life, and therefore feel guilty when that happens.. I'm sorry you're struggling.
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| markmcc21
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#3
Jun 12, 2017, 03:53 PM
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I can't say I feel that way exactly.
 But it's not unusual when I'm in a funk to feel like, if I show any kind of momentary happiness or amusement at anything, it would be inappropriate & would make it seem as though perhaps I'm just faking my anxiety & depression.  It's strange how I can be feeling anxious, depressed & even passively suicidal on the one hand & yet find something that will "tickle my funny-bone", as the saying goes, at the same time... confusing... 
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#4
Jun 12, 2017, 03:54 PM
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Quote:
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bipolar II lithium, Tegretol, perphenazine (Trilafon), Cymbalta, lorazepam My blog: https://bipolarmark.wordpress.com/ |
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#5
Jun 12, 2017, 09:54 PM
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When we lose our sense of humor the battle is lost, if we lose ourselves the war is lost ,the little things that make your depression "wonder" are the "power ups" to get you to stay in the fight .
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#6
Jun 12, 2017, 10:29 PM
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I completely relate and understand to the best of my connections. I have a continuous sense of guilt for any moment of pleasure or laughter or sense of anything beyond dred and fear. I don't understand it by any means, but I can assure you that you are SOOOO not alone
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#7
Jun 12, 2017, 11:01 PM
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I can relate to what you're saying. I don't feel deserving of relief from my misery and that's where guilt stems from for me.
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#8
Jun 13, 2017, 12:01 PM
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yeah...
i do this... im trying to stop it... maybe its a learned behavior... it might have something to do with invalidating our experience with depression... for me maybe i feel like if i laugh, then maybe im not depressed and i was just making it all up... and that makes me feel like ****... so i deny the happiness... because i dont want to be a liar or manipulator... but i am trying to teach myself that i am not making anything up... and that i really do have things that i need to work through and i need to not worry about if i am making anything up or not... to just experience...
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