[FallDuskTrain]

Originally Posted by Rose76

Yesterday, I thought I had turned a corner and that I would probably be alright, at least for awhile. I went to bed feeling okay.

I didn't wake up okay. And I didn't improve, as the day went on, which I often do. I can't seem to keep my head above water for any length of time.

Rose76;
I was thinking about you and our morning depressing, earlier this evening and was considering communicating with you.
I am sorry that currently your morning depression seems to stretch into the day.
Is there anything you need from us to do?
Again, I am sorry.
It will get better. I really believe that.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by Rose76

Yesterday, I thought I had turned a corner and that I would probably be alright, at least for awhile. I went to bed feeling okay.

I didn't wake up okay. And I didn't improve, as the day went on, which I often do. I can't seem to keep my head above water for any length of time.

That's how it often goes when one is emotionally drained unless one takes the necessary steps to fully replenish said emotional strength.

You are n have been going through a lot. You expect a lot out of yourself. I often don't think others expect it out of you but you hold yourself to a standard that you find near impossible to achieve. I think that standard has been ingrained into you though and so it is hard to break - especially when your boyfriend still tries to reinforce it at times. I hope you will find a way to break free from those "chains" so you can finally find the rest you need to restore your strength.

❤

[sky457]

I hope I will be ok tonight...

[nikon]

Cepheid - thanks

Purple Violet Blue - I'm so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you at this time. x

Sky457 - i hope so too. what's going on today?

i've been better.

and i've been worse

I am in the middle somewhere

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by sky457

I hope I will be ok tonight...

sky - how are you this morning?

[regretful]

Teetering on the edge, again. Last night was the first night of insomnia in quite some time. Calling a doc today, which may be the first step towards making a reluctant return to anti-depressants. I just don't know what else to do. Wishing all of you at least a moment's peace today.

[Kote]

Yesterday was bad. I was in my head for most of it. But luckily I texted my sister pretty early in the day about what was going on and she helped me out. I really hate this time change. I used to love it but now it just makes my mood worse. It makes me feel like my day is over at 5pm so there's no point in doing anything except watching tv & going to sleep. I feel a little better today though. Gotta focus on my plan & take everything one day at a time. Strength to everyone today.

[Rose76]

I've been awake all night. I need some kind of help.

I'm getting concerned about my dog who seems to be getting weaker. He doesn't get up too well. I've given him some water and some food but he doesn't seem to want to eat for now. I'm frustrated at work too. As there's a Christmas meal coming up, I feel forced to come. My supervisor and someone else has come up to me multiple times and mentioned about this. This morning, I got annoyed with the person. He kept asking me for a reason and I did give him one. I'd be too tired to come and plus I don't want to go. I have volunteering on that day so I'll be frikin exhausted. All they care about is themselves. He was like "you want to do nothing". I didn't know there was a disco afterwards. My supervisor didn't mention about it. Why come to it when I can't get a proper break and I get called up in a meeting and shamed in front of the whole group for booking a week off during christmas?? This guy at work frustrates me too. He has a wife but likes flirting and kissing lady's hands. He has bothered me a few times.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by Rose76

I've been awake all night. I need some kind of help.

You ok now Rose?

[nikon]

I've had a good-ish day haven't been very productive, but did most of the things i needed to do and saw my therapist. i think i might have clicked how therapy works.... after being in therapy on and off for nine years... oops. since last week something in my brain seems to have clicked that it feels better if i talk about the things that really make me feel bad inside, rather than just things that make my life difficult in the present. for ages i have felt like i'm not supposed to talk about things that make me feel worst.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

I think that's a good sign, nikon

[regretful]

Just a quick update - I made an MD appointment for tomorrow with a doc who specializes in alternative approaches to treating depression (by alternative, I mean without relying on pharmaceuticals, which is good given my propensity for side-effects). Expensive, but hopefully worth it because I hate feeling like this.

[Purple,Violet,Blue]

Originally Posted by regretful

Just a quick update - I made an MD appointment for tomorrow with a doc who specializes in alternative approaches to treating depression (by alternative, I mean without relying on pharmaceuticals, which is good given my propensity for side-effects). Expensive, but hopefully worth it because I hate feeling like this.

Really pleased to hear that, Regretful!

[Purple,Violet,Blue]

Originally Posted by nikon

I've had a good-ish day haven't been very productive, but did most of the things i needed to do and saw my therapist. i think i might have clicked how therapy works.... after being in therapy on and off for nine years... oops. since last week something in my brain seems to have clicked that it feels better if i talk about the things that really make me feel bad inside, rather than just things that make my life difficult in the present. for ages i have felt like i'm not supposed to talk about things that make me feel worst.

Yay! A breakthrough. You deserve this.

Thanks for your kind wishes.

I don't know how to ask for help and I am overwhelmed.

[Rose76]

I was just looking at facebook, where people display so much evidence of how successful their lives are . . . . . and I feel like I'm a nothing.

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by Rose76

I was just looking at facebook, where people display so much evidence of how successful their lives are . . . . . and I feel like I'm a nothing.

What causes you to feel you are a nothing?

Originally Posted by Rose76

I was just looking at facebook, where people display so much evidence of how successful their lives are . . . . . and I feel like I'm a nothing.

I was on Facebook one time and I quit it just after only two weeks. It was because of the depression I felt after looking at others and seeing how "successful" they are. I've heard that depression is very common for those on Facebook.

I wouldn't take what you see seriously. Facebook has a nickname "Fakebook". I think that's what it really is. I personally think that it would be a good idea to quit Facebook or not look at it at all.

[Rose76]

Yes, will19, I might do well to stay away from it. I know what you mean about fakebook. I hadn't heard that. That's a good one. Everyone has become their own PR publicist. It's all about portraying oneself in the best possible light and showing off to your followers how wonderful you're life is. You'ld think no one had any real problems. So how is there so much misery in the land?

[mulan]

Hate the effects of depression on cognition... Memory, though process, speach... May be some day you will be OK. Not when I like sleep poorly for sure.
The only me at those times is a speachless one, with, incredibly, nothing to say.
I still don't understand how I don't have anything to say in conversations, but it is true. Today was very true.

[sky457]

Hi Jennifer, I made it through. Thanks for checking in

[Crypts_Of_The_Mind]

Originally Posted by will19

I was on Facebook one time and I quit it just after only two weeks. It was because of the depression I felt after looking at others and seeing how "successful" they are. I've heard that depression is very common for those on Facebook.

I wouldn't take what you see seriously. Facebook has a nickname "Fakebook". I think that's what it really is. I personally think that it would be a good idea to quit Facebook or not look at it at all.

I go through times I take breaks from it for months at a time sometimes simply for these reasons but I eventually return bc its the only way certain family members keep me "in the loop".

[lotusblossom19]

Nope, not actually feeling significantly better than I was before. Just better at hiding away and holding back. Some improvement.