confessions of little turtle with love

my first breakdown at age 19....I loved that girl...everything was going well..
and then I returned from my work on the ore boats....she said---I never want to see you again....I then just couldn't speak...I went to my room for 2 weeks and when I came out....I was changed ...my whole world changed and I was in a deep depression,,,
that was the start of my mental illness...

At least you got someone to love to. I don't even have a pet let alone a girlfriend. Or hell, even a boyfriend.

both of my parents were a problem for me...
my father hurt me more than helped...
my mother helped me more than she hurt me..
but my mother spoiled me...

Wish I could have been spoiled instead of petrified.

Thanks for sharing, and not implying that any of this stuff is irrelevant. To anyone with a brain I think childhood DOES have an impact on life.

Bury it or not, cover it with chocolate. Or bear ****... It still doesn’t vanish into nothing.

Both my parents hurt me more than helped..

That sucks little turtle

How long had you known her for (no need to answer)

Your construction of reality was changed... something not totally dissimilar happened to me

I wonder how petrol tastes like.

Erm ....... like petrol?

We on PC love you, chemist

thanks fuzzy....
I didn't know that girl very long...
what happened to you...

Huh? Petrol?

Too much to list

And I don’t think some even want to know

This is a serious thread

Why do people write stuff that.

I don’t know

And why are a few posters not even acknowledged at all

little turtle

Sorry .. as you know I like to be accepted AS IS

As I think everyone does..

Not saying I accept any behaviour from anyone though. I do not.

Just in general. I have my boundaries, to keep the Bear safe and “healthy”

Respectful regards

Or just bury the bear deep in the ground.

Why not?

we don't have to bury anybody fuzzy..
we can go on here without distraction..
we don't have to pay attention to any crap..
do you want to say anything...
otherwise I can say more about my girlfriend..

so I will go on...19 yo
and I was being successful in every area-----school/work/scholarship/girlfriend..
and then no girlfriend...I fell totally apart...I couldn't believe what was happening..
my mind/brain seemed to be changing...and it didn't feel good...

Indeed.. life sucks far too often

I would say I was successful at 18 or 19.. not as much as the paternal unit demanded.... I didn’t have a scholarship.....

But I MORE than was able to go to university and “succeed” at the age of 18... or 19...

I was told, NO - money doesn’t grow on trees.



I did later “succeed” and “accomplish” a good honours degree.....

But he was fu.cking LOADED with cash. Literally



And I was repeatedly told I was “mean” as well as “selfish”

...... it’s a no brainier, really............



PS and I’m supposed to have “empathy” for people of .l. Say..l 16... who appear, to me, to not be over endowed with empathy, or positive sensitivity

If I’d had kids of my own I’d have been a GOOD MOMMA BEAR

(((((((( little turtle )))))))))

To those who have ears...... pay attention to little turtle.......

Little Turtle, in light of later events, do you believe this "falling apart" at age 19 made you more susceptible to repeat depressive episodes, or was it more - or less - than susceptibility?

Do please feel free to ignore the question.

little turtle and Fuzzy and Chemist, you're all deserving of love and care

thanks rohag for your question...you are very gentle..
I was traumatized by that loss...so I guess ptsd..
then I did well for several years and then came THE PANIC ATTACK...
again that freaked me out...again I suppose ptsd...
it took about 7 years before I finally broke so bad that I couldnt
work at all for 4 years....

psychiatry is so important but it has gone so wrong...
money and greed and arrogance has taken over..
I had a very hard time fighting these forces but I did it...
and I am still here...and there is hope for us...

I just heard that scientists have found a new type of neuron in
the human brain....called the rosehip neuron...maybe this will help us..

so do you whispershadow

Rohag is very gentle, a good example to all, especially those who may struggle with gentleness ...



...........



Money, greed and arrogance...it’s sad when any human being is consumed by any of those

Little turtle is, as I think all would agree, a survivor and an example of a Good
Person (and a “good” doctor” )

Fuzzy bear however does not please all.. and never will.

And I have no wish to change who I am... I am a good bear

This is part of being the unique Bear I am

Good post, I hope that little turtle is believed .. he speaks the truth.

Is my bus driving ok, little turtle?

And which bus are we on?

I think we are on the AS IS bus

you are going good fuzzy