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#1
Nov 25, 2007, 05:52 PM
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Normally I write a lot. It's my way of expressing myself and trying to un tangle the thoughts whizzing around. I find it a lot of help just to get the feelings out.
But I cannot write now. The words are gone. I cannot connect with the paper and pen. I am just sitting alone in a quiet dark room. I try and work things out, but it all seems to come to a dead end. My mind just shuts off. It's scaring me. |
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#2
Nov 25, 2007, 06:02 PM
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Mind shutting off is familiar to me. It happens to some degree most if not all the time. When I get it to start working again, I find so much anxiety lurking that it is very hard to cope with that.
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Now if thou would'st When all have given him o'er From death to life Thou might'st him yet recover -- Michael Drayton 1562 - 1631 |
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#3
Nov 25, 2007, 06:06 PM
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you are not totally alone anna.. trust that what you feel will pass.. we are happy to have you with us... swoooshing away the boogeymen ... swooosh, swooosh...
hang in there, k? |
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#4
Nov 25, 2007, 06:06 PM
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I understand. I'm glad you are able to reach out and post here. (((((( anna342 )))))) 
__________________
 Pegasus Got a quick question related to mental health or a treatment? Ask it here General Q&A Forum “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein |
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#5
Nov 25, 2007, 06:13 PM
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Thank you. This is making me angry, I hate anger. I just want everything to go away.
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#6
Nov 25, 2007, 06:27 PM
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what ive heard about anger management is 1st) stop. 2nd) count to 10, slowly... 3rd) take a look at what is making you angry... do you have some control over it? if you do, calm yourself by doing what you can... if not, examine what would improve the situation... maybe a glass of tea, dee breathing, read a book...
the idea is to distract yourself from the issue that angers you... when calm you can make more intelligent choices and decisions... i've learned to never act out my anger... does this help? |
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#7
Nov 25, 2007, 06:35 PM
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Myself is making me angry and other people's stupidness. I try and live my life being nice to people, but I have an urge just to scream and shout at everyone.
Right now all I can do is take my meds and hopefully fall asleep. |
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#8
Nov 25, 2007, 06:42 PM
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i hear you... at times it seems we can only be aware of everything that's broken... i know how it feels... and everyone telling me i'm wallowing in it...
but i really wasn't wallowing.. it was contemplating... isn't it natural to study something that affects you so deeply? and i didn't even care that that's how the majority of my time was spent... i've learned issues don't always resolve themselves... ya, i felt plenty of anger to, but then, when i'd say something about the reasons i was angry, most people looked at me like i was the weak link in the chain, but that's only because they themselves were doing nothing to fix things and didn't want to, it was easier for them if i would just play the avoidance game too.... but take it in small bites... give yourself some time... it may take a lot of time... don't give up, but rest when needed.. take a walk... enjoy something, whatever (hopefully healthy) takes your mind off for awhile... enjoy some sun, or how 'bout that big cloud? it has a beauty too... can you see it? |
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#9
Nov 26, 2007, 02:47 PM
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I'm trying to find the good in anything. But i'm so cut off. At work people are talking to me, and I can't seem to know how to respond. If I didn't think people would start talking, I'd just not say anything. I'm trying to live up to everyone elses expectations because I have none myself.
I'm getting the terrors still, only they don't scare me, because the thought of being killed isn't so bad anymore. |
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#10
Nov 26, 2007, 03:18 PM
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anna... is there someone IRL you could ask for help? If you're this down you may need professional assistance... deep depression shouldn't be allowed to control your life...
meds could lift the dark and you'll be able to see some light.... maybe you wouldnt have to take them forever, but the meds could help get you through this spot you're in.. i can feel your pain... work is hard when you're down, being surrounded by the "happy" people only makes me more aware of my hurt and down feelings... just think it'd be good for you to find some solid ground you can stand on til this clears better... |
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#11
Nov 26, 2007, 03:56 PM
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I'm on meds, max dose of sertraline and 150mg seroquel.
The only person I really have is my social worker. I'm unable to see my psych or counsellor anymore, due to work. I cannot seem to contact my sw. Nothing physically stopping me. My mind is doing something to stop me. I know I'm not controlled by it if I don't want to be but it makes me keep myself isolated. |
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#12
Nov 26, 2007, 04:00 PM
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well, get up anna... get out there and do something to help yourself, the sooner the better sweetheart... isolation is not good for you or anyone, anytime.. there is someone who will help you, but you gotta ask them first...
sending love and caring thoughts...
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