[need2move4ward]

Saw my new psychiatrist for the 2nd time today--nothing. I probably look OK to him, but my depressin is getting worse, and my anxiety as well. I don't feel well physically either. I think I'm backsliding. Physically and emotionally exhausted, and I do nothing of substance all day, and i don't want to be on a pity pot. I have lost interest in a lot, and everything is becoming difficult on my heart physically and emotionally. I don't have a support system since moving back home here at my mom's.
Need to go, not doing good and scared and don't know what to do, feeling really ill.

[nowheretorun]

when you come back need2, we'll be here to listen... hope you feel better but, we'll take ya as ya come....

[turquoisesea]

I wish I could help... I'm still trying to figure out things of my own, so I can't just tell you there's a good ending I found it so can you or anything but what I WILL say
Is that it's ok to be scared, sometimes things just get really tough. And things can get overwhelming. The best way to try to deal... is take small steps, talk to people as much as you can about it.

As far as being on a pity pot... I don't know how much you complain generally or anything, but sometimes... it's more that you want to talk to someone , to get help than to see those worried faces just for their own sake. I would guess that's not what you're going for. Rather you're trying to help yourself. In fact that's a really good thing. And, especially here don't worry, we're here to talk anytime. Not sure if this all makes any sense, I'm not especially clear-thinking today so if you need clarification ask ^_^

keep trying, I hope your psychiatrist works out for you and things get better

*hugs*

[Doh2007]

Did you tell these things to your doctor? Sometimes we think we need to put on a brave face, but then don't get the help we need.

[stefano]

Have more trust... no real doc could oversee these symptoms. And if you are in doubt, speak them loud. Solving the problem is the primary concern, you need to have things clear with your doc, if not with the rest of the world.

The best of luck

[need2move4ward]

I haven't told my psychiatrist about the breakdown I had this morning in my car in front of Starbucks. I just said to God-which I say a lot, "sorry, but i can't hold it in anymore" things piled up and tears just came down my face this morning. I take Suboxone for pain and opiate addiction and Librium for anxiety, I was hyperventilating--they seemed to help, now just trying to rest. I'm looking forward to the new year, and i do need to tell my psychiatrist, I see him again next week. I'm in limbo right now about whether to move backup to Northern California--which would mean I may have to wait to back to college in the Fall, or stay where I'm at and finish school this year at the school I have been going to. I am hoping I can finish, but if I'm having mood swings, i will not be able to succeed at finishing.
Antidepressants do not agree with me, and bipolar meds do not either, I suffer from a little bit of PTSD, Anxiety, and depression and mood swings. As far as the pity pot issue--many many people tell me I am a strong woman--ok, I appreciate that, but it doesn't make up for the INTENSE fear I have about going out to meet new people abnd trust them. I like to be a lone to a certain extent, but am a lot happier when I'm with other people. BPD has been talked about because my relationships with people have been all over the board---but then again, i take the blame for most things that go wrong--so it'shard to believ a "label". I feel like I'm just a woman who is very lost, and am sick of living in the town i live in. I am free to go wherever I choose right now, and of yo thin about it, that is a HUGE place to be in, a huge decision has to be made at this point, considering factors. I have done so much work on myself, my past, what makes me tick, it's time to let the past go. I worry so much and when icompare myself to my peers---I feel like dying. Somehow i just try to believe that I'm right where I'm supposed to be. If it weren't for medication, I wouldn't survive right now. I've been trying to get to the root of the problems), but life is going on....

[Doh2007]

Hon,

It sounds like your body is sick and needs some good doctoring. Making big life changes, like moving? That takes a lot of energy and is high on the stress scale. But if you have to, there's no shame in doing what's best for yourself.

Please nurture yourself. You are worth it!

[need2move4ward]

Did it sound like my post was about my body? I do feel stressed, and it sems to be taking its toll on my body in forms of severe tension, constipation, clenching, smoking too much where my chest is really sore. I am truly scared.
Wonder if I stopped focusing on all of it, I would feel better?
I was away from a computer for a long time, and I get stressed, believ it or not, when I sit at my computer and type LOL my neck and shoulders tense up and my neck cracks when I move my head after typing for a while,, just so tense with everything I do, like rush rush rush, like I'm n such a hurry for life!!! My brain is all over the place always thinking thinking thinking
This has to stop, but how?