Tossing everything in trash

Anyone else stop caring about material things that years ago made u happy? And u valued these items cuz they entertained u, etc? Or u just plain cared about anything that used to bring joy? I started discarding things I collected, etc. I got rid of music CD's which I loved listening to. Old photos I had in beautiful frames I picked out, thrown in trash. I care about not much, at all now. My mental health keeps deteriorating, it seems. Happiness is in the past. All gone now. I even threw out artwork I made, that I used to be proud of. Sad, but true. Along with the art, what really disturbed me is that i have stopped listening to music, at all. Music was always the one thing i enjoy the most. That has never happened to me before, that i dont even care about music. I seem to want complete silence, now. Its just foreign to me. Another example, i had my home decorated really nicely, with lovely things i hand-picked. Trashed everything. Blank walls now. Blank, empty everything. Giving my jewelry away to my sister who admired it. I want nothing, anymore. Stopped wearing jewelry a long time ago. This depression has got me changed, for the worse. I dont understand it & i feel absolutely defeated. Thanks for reading

I think it’s normal in a depression state.
When I’m deeply depressed I know it because like you, I don’t care about activities that were a pleasure before, such as what you mention, listening to music.
Are you treating your depression?

Thank you AzulOscuro for your reply. No treatment, no insurance, no money. Nothingness. I was attempting to look up free mental health. I don't see much, its whatever at this point. Keep surviving along, I don't know. Thanks again...

I’m sorry you are not having the help you need.
I’m under antidepressants and I have experience at doing psychological therapy. Somehow, I think it helps. It helps to see things in a different way, not so dark. Have some hope. Find kind of balance.

I know you feel empty and hopeless. But, don’t give it up. Would you know that there are natural resources that can make work the same substances in the brain that antidepressants provide.
I know it’s not easy because it means to do things you don’t have the strength to do, like exercising, sunbathes, taking a pretty strict schedule of tasks to provide yourself healthy meals and such.
I do understand you.
Do you count at least with somebody you can talk about it or spend time with, without judging you or you are alone?

Hi,

When I first came down with a mental illness, I was led to believe that my family was in jeopardy. That if I gave away my belongings and did nothing with my life, didn't eat food, that I was keeping my family safe.

My mom would cry they didn't understand what I was doing.

It led to hospitalizations medications and a destroyed family.

I wish someone slapped me and told me not to change keep all my belongings and asked what particularly was happening to show them, to know I would not be judged for my answers or thoughts, to be honest.

While this maybe far from what your experiencing, in all of my belongings I got rid of was also bits and pieces of my sanity, my innocence. These are the building blocks of the civilization weve created with out them we cast ourselves out.

Just remember these feelings of yours will pass don't lean too much on to them. Learn some from them but do not abandon your life the carefree person who owned those items you mentioned wasn't depressed or the way you described at one point or another, hold on to that person your fighting for him her.

I don't know maybe you took something away from that, Im sorry for how your feeling.

I'm sorry you're going through that. In some ways I can relate. I used to love listening to music all day long. Now I can only tolerate rain/thunder sounds. Most music makes me feel depressed. It seems so sad. As far as belongings go, I started giving stuff away about 6 months ago. Things from my kitchen, living room and bedroom. Last year I became very upset about my children (very upsetting story) that I threw all their pictures away. I remember the day. I slammed their photos into the dumpster and hit the button to compress it all. To this day, I'm glad I don't have their photos. Like you, I blame my depression. I'm on medicine but I think I need to increase some of it. I hope you can find free health care or some natural remedies. Sending good thoughts your way!

I'm sorry you're so depressed @shovelhead. I don't know where you live, but there are often mental health programs for people with low income where access to psychiatrists and therapists is on a sliding scale or free. Where I live it's done through the county mental health department. I hope you can find some help.

Same here... got a bunch of stuff that's been collecting dust, as I had grand plans for the outdoors and other hobbies. That's pretty much the last thing on my mind now.

I hope you find help and ways to enjoy again...

I want to Thank every single member who commented here & sent hugs/thanks. Your replies & what u wrote mean a lot to me. I'm not very good at putting my feelings down into words. This depression runs back as far as me being an abused 5 year old girl. I really do hope to speak with a professional someday. Thanks again for sharing your own struggles, here. This is really a wonderful community of people here, I've noticed.