[dexter]

Didn't sleep much and I am incredibly nauseous today. I have to make some calls and I am procrastinating. If I'm kicked out of here not only do I have no idea what I am going to do, I also have no idea what I would do with all my stuff... a houseful of stuff, how would I pack it? Move it? and to where?

I don't know how I am going to get through the next few weeks. I don't know who to call, I am going in circles. How am I even going to eat anything today?

Some friends were going to go with me to a movie last weekend but couldn't (and once again... they didn't call to say they couldn't, they just didn't show up WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE??) and yesterday I got an email (telling me they couldn't make it last week... DUH) and wants to go this Friday. I don't know if I will be homeless on Friday or not, I'm not going to make plans to see a movie. My brain is in the state it was in a year ago... can't focus, would sit through a movie without seeing it and then be upset afterward.

I have to make some calls. I'm in bad shape today.

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--http://www.idexter.com

[gloria]

Dex!!!!Shake it off!!!!
Get off you buttom, grab a piece of paper and write:

1- Take a "wake up" shower.
2- Call __________ to talk about _________
3- Call __________ to talk about _________

Then just go ahead and DO IT!!!

It's up to you what kind of life you're going to have buddy.

gab

[dexter]

I showered before I turn the computer on (can't function at all until I've had a shower) and I did make my phone calls, now I have to make a decision and everything is just so close. I am still incredibly nauseous and tired. I am going to pick up some paperwork from my doctor in a little while and drop it off at the DVR, hopefully going out will make me feel better, or at least different. I was out all day yesterday though and still a mess. I can't even remember where I went yesterday... that's troubling... I know I stopped to visit a friend afterward... yea workforce orientation that's where I went, had an appointment at 1:00 there yesterday.

I am going to try calling someone, I have to do something...

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--http://www.idexter.com

[krzyk101]

Hey ((((((Dexter)))))))

Your Brain is not as it was a year ago!! Your out of bed!!

I think now you are just under alot of stress and considering all you are going thorough and all of the decisions to be made and uncertainty of it all you are handling it well.

My T says under a great deal of added stressors the 'symptoms' can flare up, until things get back to a comfortable level.

Hope you get calmed down and begin to feel better and keep up on a positive note!

Oh, Liked the analyzing story of going to the clubs. I tend to over analyze everything. Way too much. I couldn't reply the other night cause I was too busy analyzing the post. I don't dance either, hell I haven't even made it in the door for years.

Hope you have a good day
Chris

______________
~KRIS~

(if I didn't help, please know I do honestly have good intentions & speak through personal experiences)

If you think you have totally gave up, you haven't, because you are here!

[gloria]

What ever decision you need to make, list your prons and cons and make it. I am sure it sounds a lot easier than it really is, but you sound to me like you are procastinating at making an important decision.

Just do it, go for it and get it off your shoulders, analyze pros and cons and get it done and over with. My grandfather used to say:

"If you have a problem you can resolve, don't worry because you can resolve it. If you have a problem you cannnot resolve, don't worry either since you cannot resolve it anyhow".

Lots of love to you.

gab

[Wants2Fly]

I wish I could support the advice to "just to do it." It sounds so sensible. Yet, no one would think of telling an AIDs patient to just take a shower, make a list of pros and cons, and get out there and just shake off that ole killer virus and just do it.

I've been in your shoes as recently as March.

I found it very helpful to get help. So the call someone advice, yes, you have to do that. People came and helped me organize, pack, and throw away. You are not in a position to pay people; I was able to provide some minimal payment. Others helped out of the goodness of their hearts.

I had to throw much stuff I thought I couldn't do without away. It was hard.

I see people on the BBC shows "The Life Laundry" who cry when the professional organizers make them get rid of stuff -- and they are uncluttering their lives by choice. We are NOT. We have been forced by situations in our lives to do so; it is not voluntary.

It will be better if you salvage what you can of your old life. And I pray that we both will emerge from the fire like the phoenix rising from the ashes, reborn.

Prayers and hugs.