[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

snip: Right now, someone is using a leaf blower just outside of my window and it's been going on for three hours. It looks like it's not going to stop. I have to have my windows closed and suffocate in the heat because of the noise and dust flying around. It feels like my home is not going to be nice anymore.

I find the sound of leaf blowers unbearable. Tree trimmers too which I believe are chain saws. One time they suddenly started trimming the trees but the manager didn’t warn us. Just because they don’t need to come inside our units that doesn’t mean it isn’t intrusive. It’s LOUD and even with the windows closed I can hear them.

And at certain times of the day I get cigarette smoke. And it’s hot yet I can’t open my windows much because of it.

The only quiet time I get is the first couple of hours after I get up. And it’s harder to get up now that the sun is rising later, until the time change.

My neighborhood seems to be deteriorating so much. Police helicopters are circling overhead several times a week now. Yesterday they circled my building 10 minutes but it felt like hours. It was scary because they are looking for someone but I don’t know who or if that person is trying to hide out in my building. In spite of the sign out front that says it’s a security building, there’s no security.

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[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by JaneOnceMore

I hate my neighbors too. They're such nosy know-it-alls. It's surprisingly easy to avoid them tho. I open my door and listen in the hallway for activity before i leave my apartment.

I'm going to have to make an effort with the one who keeps dumping on me about his heart attack. He never expresses any interest in me or offers me any support, he just dumps on me details upon details about his heart attack. I'm not this bottomless well of support! And he goes on and on about his weight when he is skinny and i am fat due to meds -- it's so insensitive! Next time i'm going to ignore him.

I had a couple of neighbors suddenly stop talking to me. They look right at me and ignore me. And I thought they seemed like nice and sincere people. Another one used to talk to me on the phone and claimed it was a 2 way street, that she will be there for me too. (She dumped emotionally on me quite a bit) But the last time we talked she hung up on me after saying she is going to take a nap now.

I wouldn’t mind some neighbor contact but not phony one sided interactions.



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[Violetta75]

Originally Posted by will19

Today had some ups and downs. The "up" part was that I had my stitches removed on my arm. But yet, I don't have total freedom until next week. I can ride my bike but I can't do my band resistance exercises, which is one "down" part.

Another down part was that it was noisy this morning with the driveway work next door. But at 1 PM it had finally finished.

I'm feeling a bit tired today because I didn't sleep well last night.

Just curious, do you find all this exercises really helpful for depression? I can't move around as much lately and I'm getting more depressed and useless feeling. Hope you get the stitches healed so your back with the resistance training.

[Violetta75]

I'm digging out of a mess but it gives me anxiety just looking at it. All my life is contained in one bedroom so things need a spot but I have no dresser drawers or room for one. I've been having awful feelings about myself, haven't slept enough which makes everything feel so much worse

Originally Posted by Violetta75

Just curious, do you find all this exercises really helpful for depression? I can't move around as much lately and I'm getting more depressed and useless feeling. Hope you get the stitches healed so your back with the resistance training.

Doing exercises always help with my depression, even when I don't feel like it. I feel better while doing it and after. In itself it doesn't totally cure it, but it helps. Well, shoot!, even prize-winning athletes struggle with it. I'm sorry to hear about you not being able to move around as much.

I was very depressed last week when I couldn't do my band resistance and bike riding. I could have done other things but I didn't know what to do. Also I had to endure the loud noises from next door when they were doing the driveway and being so hot.

The stitches came out yesterday but I have to heal a little bit more, which means no band resistance until next week. At least I can go bike riding, so that's OK. Thank you so much for asking me.

[JaneOnceMore]

I was able to protect myself from my neighbors today. On my evening walk i encountered three of them, including the one who dumps on me. I just told them, "Have a good evening," and hurried on. They co-operated. So that went well. It was a beautiful, chilly, refreshing evening, cool enough for pants, hoodie, and a jacket. So unusual for August, but i'll take it over the heat any day!

I got really angry in the afternoon with someone, but i decided not to react, as i almost never encounter this person. If it was someone i see on a regular basis, i'd consider confronting them, but this one i will just let go. My anger has passed nicely. Gotta pick your battles!

@nonightowl:

I agree that relationships have to be reciprocal to be worthwhile. I'm sorry about that woman who cut you off to take a nap. That's really ignorant.

@will19:

Glad you are able to ride your bike again. I'm sure you'll be able to get back to the resistance band training in time. I really admire your commitment to exercise!

@Violetta75:

I'm limited physically too, by med weight, but if i get outside for even just a few minutes of walking, admiring the gardens, it's better than nothing. I rest on a bench, enjoy the fresh air, the wide-open sky, and the break from my tiny apartment.

[nonightowl]

Will are you ever not motivated to work out? Sometimes it’s a chore for me but I try to stay consistent because if I skip days, it will be that much harder as mentioned. On those days I do a shorter workout. The gym is air conditioned but I walk there. It’s just a few blocks but feels like walking in the desert it’s so hot. I hate how exercise is touted as a panacea for everything and how it’s supposed to give you energy. It makes me tired which is why I go in the afternoon.

Jane I talk to just one real life person. I’m so sick of the lack of reciprocity or any interest in anything about me or how things are for me. I don’t even make the effort anymore. I’m still open to it as it’s my nature but tired of always having to reach out first. It’s lonely but people aren’t sincere. My only consolation is it happens to other people, as I’ve seen on this site and others.

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"Are you ever not motivated to workout?" - from Nonightowl. There had been times when I don't feel like it, but then I'd end up doing it anyways. I have to admire you for going to the gym because I feel like that's what I should do, but I'm too introverted for it. The gyms were too stimulating and overwhelming for me when I checked them out.

I guess the times I would feel the most unmotivated would be if it's too hot, I'm feeling ill, or there's overwhelmingly bad things happening to me. Thank you for asking. I hope I answered your question.

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

"Are you ever not motivated to workout?" - from Nonightowl. There had been times when I don't feel like it, but then I'd end up doing it anyways. I have to admire you for going to the gym because I feel like that's what I should do, but I'm too introverted for it. The gyms were too stimulating and overwhelming for me when I checked them out.

I guess the times I would feel the most unmotivated would be if it's too hot, I'm feeling ill, or there's overwhelmingly bad things happening to me. Thank you for asking. I hope I answered your question.

Yes you did thank you. I’m introverted too but I just have acquaintances there to say hi to. It’s the only place where I can zone out and reflect on things if I want. It’s mostly young people who are staring at their phones or they are engrossed in their workouts while wearing headphones. It’s not social but wish it were since I go nowhere. A workout buddy would be motivating.

I used to work out with a coworker at the company gym decades ago. I miss those times.

I also skip it if bad things happened too.

Yesterday was especially hard because it was almost 100. It’s a shock to leave as it feels like walking into an oven. I almost didn’t go; I could blow it off.

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[JaneOnceMore]

It's my birthday today and i was feeling grim until my one and only nice neighbor who is French sent me a charming little French birthday song. It cheered me up a lot.

[Buffy01]

:: I’ve been working on some my self-help books by trying to understand how to deal with my trauma that has caused my depression

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by JaneOnceMore

It's my birthday today and i was feeling grim until my one and only nice neighbor who is French sent me a charming little French birthday song. It cheered me up a lot.

have a wonderful birthday

[Rose76]

It took forever to get myself out of bed this morning. That's a bad sign. But I finally got up, went out and ran some errands. So I feel fairly okay. I won't stay okay, if I don't make a better schedule for tomorrow and stick to it. Weekends don't feel good to me.

Quote from Rose76 - "Weekends don't feel good to me". Funny thing is that I feel the same way. I've been retired for three years but yet I feel that way. Perhaps, it's because I don't want to go anywhere on Saturdays, Sundays, and holiday Mondays. Maybe that's why for me.

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

Quote from Rose76 - "Weekends don't feel good to me". Funny thing is that I feel the same way. I've been retired for three years but yet I feel that way. Perhaps, it's because I don't want to go anywhere on Saturdays, Sundays, and holiday Mondays. Maybe that's why for me.

Me either. I think because it used to mean something, it was something to look forward to. The djs on this radio station I like seem stuck in the past. They think everyone works 9-5 weekdays and has weekends off. They say stuff like the workweek is almost over and the WEEKEND is almost here. And so they are feeling upbeat as a result. Big deal! A lot of companies expect people to work weekends and nights, holidays too. There is practically no downtime and those 9-5 days are long gone!

The only way my weekend differs from the week is that I don’t do any chores except grocery shopping. But that’s just every other week. Sunday is the only day there’s no road work or construction going on. I live between two very busy streets so it’s getting harder to get in and out. They are building more apartments and not the kind most people can afford.

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[Violetta75]

[QUOTE=will19;7438464]Doing exercises always help with my depression, even when I don't feel like it. I feel better while doing it and after. In itself it doesn't totally cure it, but it helps. Well, shoot!, even prize-winning athletes struggle with it. I'm sorry to hear about you not being able to move around as much.

I was very depressed last week when I couldn't do my band resistance and bike riding. I could have done other things but I didn't know what to do. Also I had to endure the loud noises from next door when they were doing the driveway and being so hot.

The stitches came out yesterday but I have to heal a little bit more, which means no band resistance until next week. At least I can go bike riding, so that's OK. Thank you so much for asking me.[/QUOTE

thank you Will. I understand about noises going on, I have that here, they were doing a roof for 2 weeks or so, and just cutting grass, weed whackers, birds too early chirping in the morning. I'm actually believing righ now, as I'm very stressed out, that there are benefits to liking winter. i don't like how cold it gets or going outside much, to just sit, its too cold unless you're moving around. I think I sleep better in winter too, because of less bugs, most people are inside their own houses. Having sleep or peace interuppted so much isn't nice at all. .in winter, I think of ''well its nice and quiet compared to the noise, and it's ok to be a little lazier and get warm. I use a heating pad and it helps my pain. Sorry to go on and on.... but I find it very hard to get peace lately too. Thatks for sympathizing with someone who can't move around enough, I appreciate that. Hope when you get to do those resistance bands it will help. Thanks for reading my post. Depression can be a beast. If I could do what you're doing I'd lose some of my depression. I hope you're having a better day/evening/night when you see this!

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by Violetta75

snip: I think I sleep better in winter too, because of less bugs, most people are inside their own houses. Having sleep or peace interuppted so much isn't nice at all.

I do too because not only is it cooler but people are quieter. I find the short days depressing but the neighbors will be inside more and won’t have their doors and windows open, which increases the sounds of their noise.

Sleep experts say how a cool room is better for sleep but not everyone has air conditioning so they suffer at night trying to sleep. I don’t like having my routine disrupted and sometimes I can’t even sleep or do what I want because of the effing neighbors. The guy above me is always having guests like some bed and breakfast place. Hearing HIM is enough; I don’t need more from others.

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Today was a nicer day for cleaning for a couple of reasons. It was cooler outside and no noise outside. So that made me feel a little bit better. Nothing much to report about after the cleaning.

One little not so nice thing happening to me today is that I feel like I have an attack with allergies. I've been blowing my nose for most of the day and some sneezing. I think that this is the time of year to have it.

[nonightowl]

Violetta I forgot to comment on this part:

…because of less bugs

This is another thing I hate about hot weather. Insects seem to like it and are around, more active. And I’m susceptible to bites and they always find me. I’m not sure if insect repellent works well and I can have bad reactions to bites: Swelling, blisters, pain, etc. So yes they aren’t around in winter and I like that. Unfortunately climate change is affecting them too and a warning environment attracts more bugs.

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[Buffy01]

one of my sisters has said some hurtful comments regarding what my diagnosis due to her beliefs and being extremely judgmental and jealous of :sadhug me

[emily1890]

Feeling depressed because there is a carnival in town, and would have been a lovely way to spend the afternoon

I can't though because of my anxiety

I felt depressed for most of the day and I don't know why. Perhaps it may have been the bright sun and being hot outside. Hot and sunny days tend to depress me for some strange reason. Perhaps it probably reminds me of the past when bad things happened at this time of year. When it's cold and cloudy, I tend to be happier. I know that sounds weird.

I worked out with my band resistance exercises for the first time in three weeks. I felt kind of scared at first but it went well. I still felt depressed after working out.

[Buffy01]

I had unintentionally triggered myself by thinking about all the things that I don’t have

[nonightowl]

Originally Posted by will19

snip: …been the bright sun and being hot outside. Hot and sunny days tend to depress me for some strange reason.

I worked out with my band resistance exercises for the first time in three weeks. I felt kind of scared at first but it went well. I still felt depressed after working out.

The hot weather reminds me of how in my youth I loved the heat. And I used to go to the beach with my friends, or in hindsight, whom I thought were my friends. But at least I had a social life. The media seems to expect people to like hot weather and have this busy social life to enjoy, with the heat!

I’m glad you got your routine back. I know what it’s like to have it disrupted.

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[nonightowl]

The senior center is having another friendship “speed dating type” thing like back in May. There was a waiting list then so now there’s still one from then. Those people have priority this time. They have limited space whatever that means. I’ve gotten too skeptical and I’m not extroverted enough. I don’t think I’ll ever go. They are touting it as “making a new friend”.

Last weekend there was a local festival they have each year around this time. I’ve never been to it. It’s usually too hot but not this year. But now that I’m older I can’t stand crowds of that size. Some stuff might be fun but I have no one to go with. Plus it reminds me of my youth when I did stuff like that all the time….with others. It reminds me of my losses I guess.

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