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  #1  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 02:15 PM
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Zen888 Zen888 is offline
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Hi Everyone

I don't know what to do. I have had medication changes recently. I have withdrawn from college for the time being.

I don't take care of myself and my home anymore. I can go several days without showering and brushing my teeth. Staying inside...mostly sleeping, watching tv or internet.

I have zero motivation to go outside. It's cold. I have to force myself to keep appointments and even this is a struggle...I keep on rescheduling or canceling appointments.

I feel and look like absolute crap!

What do I do to change? Where do I get the motivation to take care of myself and my home?

I given up on myself. My brother (only family) won't deal with me. Everyone around me seems to be having a successful life.

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  #2  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 02:27 PM
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Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
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Sending love and support
(not good with words or advice)
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Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #3  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 03:42 PM
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Miracle1986 Miracle1986 is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2007
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My mind is still all a mess.
All I have to offer is hugs.
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #4  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 05:31 PM
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pegasus pegasus is offline
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Hugs ((((((( Zen ))))))))

Go easy on yourself if you can, you have just had a spell of having no sleep for 4 days. That knocks the stuffing out of anyone. Give some time for the meds to work and get back to your Doc if you are still going down hill.

Once you start feeling a little bit better you can start to do small jobs around the home, not massive tasks, something like sorting out a corner of the room. Something that would make a visible difference so you see the results.

Be gentle with you.
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“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #5  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 05:45 PM
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mlpHolmes mlpHolmes is offline
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Member Since: Mar 2007
Location: Land of Endless Possibilities
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Hey Girlfriend!!!!!!

If I bring YOU your Favorite Starbuck's Coffee, ??????!!!!!! will that help??
I LOVE the way You put your answer throughout your post!!!!!!
That was soooo Cool!!!! & Ingenius!!
Like when you asked "What do I do to change?" and
"Where do I get the motivation to change?"

You're absolutely right!! It starts w/ Y-O -U

1st ACTION ---> GOOD FEELINGS

You can handle this! Do you have those 650 coping skills I've given out(now that's desperate, lol) (I do 1 a day as a treat!) What's worked for you in the past? To jump start yourself again???? This is just a bump in the road! You know that!!
So, I'll get extra whipped cream in 2 Large Starbuck's 'k!!

Much Love, xxoo
Holmes
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #6  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 05:53 PM
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justfloating justfloating is offline
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((((((((((zen)))))))))) I'm so sorry things aren't going well right now.

All I can tell you is not to be too hard on yourself, and do what you have to in order to take care of you. The way I started looking at depression was as some kind of thief who stole my life away, and even the slightest accomplishments on my part was my way of taking back what was rightfully mine. Stand up to the depression, but make sure you don't take on too much at once. Try taking baby steps. Make everything as relaxing as you can. I find standing or moving hard when I'm down, so I do as much sitting down as I can. Instead of a shower, maybe try a bath so you don't have to be standing and you can just lie still for a while. Instead of cleaning a whole room, tidy just your desk while you're sitting in a chair. When you brush your teeth, sit down. Getting dressed can be a series of steps -- shirt, rest, then pants, rest, then socks, rest, etc. Go slowly and be gentle with yourself. Try to accomplish things that will have a visible effect like tidying or that will pamper your body in some way, that way you can see/feel your successes. Don't forget that when you're depressed, absolutely everything you do counts as an achievement, no matter how small. You can do this. There is a light at the end of the tunnel, I promise.
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Rebecca

"If you're going through hell -- keep going."
- Winston Churchill


It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.
- Elizabeth Gilbert

Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong,
we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on.
Bring on the wonder, bring on the song,
I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long.
- Susan Enan


http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #7  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 06:58 PM
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Zen888 Zen888 is offline
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Made a minor improvement this afternoon. I washed my hair and brushed my teeth. And know its not good for you...but I ordered pizza.
  #8  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 07:28 PM
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justfloating justfloating is offline
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WOO!!! That's GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!! GOOD JOB!

ps, I hope that pizza's good!
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Rebecca

"If you're going through hell -- keep going."
- Winston Churchill


It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.
- Elizabeth Gilbert

Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong,
we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on.
Bring on the wonder, bring on the song,
I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long.
- Susan Enan


http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #9  
Old Mar 17, 2009, 10:11 PM
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Zen888 Zen888 is offline
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Member Since: Oct 2005
Posts: 3,886
Tuesday I am going to shower and go outside. I have to take my dog to the Vet to get her nails clipped. And my computer's modem is on its last leg so I have to go buy a new one. And go to Safeway.

So..pray...chant....light candles....sing a song..........whatever you believe in...so that I get outside Tuesday!!
  #10  
Old Mar 18, 2009, 07:53 AM
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justfloating justfloating is offline
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Location: Scotland/Canada
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I will be sending you lots of good vibes. Take things slow and be good to yourself! It's so great that you've planned on getting out and getting some things done. Every individual step is a huge success. Good luck!
__________________
Rebecca

"If you're going through hell -- keep going."
- Winston Churchill


It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.
- Elizabeth Gilbert

Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong,
we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on.
Bring on the wonder, bring on the song,
I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long.
- Susan Enan


http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #11  
Old Mar 18, 2009, 10:53 AM
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AnaHannah AnaHannah is offline
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Member Since: Dec 2008
Location: Jacksonville, Fla.
Posts: 49
If misery loves company.....well, here I am!
I am feeling exactly the same way you are, and if I don't do SOMETHING today, it'll be another wash, too...like the last 3 days I had off from work.
Although, I did manage to get a shower, wash my hair, and put on real clothes, not my usuual "Schlumpadinka" clothes/style, as Oprah calls it!
My moods swing so intensely, Tarzan would be jealous !
.......So; all we can do is TRY to "rally"....it seems impossible at the moment, but if YOU try, so will I. I'm falling back on my ED for comfort.....and even that's not working...even though I'm down another pound today. Not helping! Pls. G-d, give me strength! This too, shall pass. Shalom, AnaHannah
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  #12  
Old Mar 18, 2009, 01:41 PM
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Zen888 Zen888 is offline
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Posts: 3,886
Wasn't able to make it outside today. My meds are making me to sleepy during the morning. I feel like I'm dying.
  #13  
Old Mar 18, 2009, 01:49 PM
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justfloating justfloating is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2009
Location: Scotland/Canada
Posts: 1,502


It's all right if you couldn't make it out today. Try again tomorrow. You'll get there eventually.

If you notice your meds' side effects are really making things bad/worse and they persist (mine had all kinds of annoying side effects but they evetually wore off), maybe you could talk to your doctor about a change?

rest, be kind to yourself -- tomorrow is a new day.
__________________
Rebecca

"If you're going through hell -- keep going."
- Winston Churchill


It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.
- Elizabeth Gilbert

Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong,
we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on.
Bring on the wonder, bring on the song,
I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long.
- Susan Enan


http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/
Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #14  
Old Mar 18, 2009, 04:53 PM
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silver_moon silver_moon is offline
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Posts: 2,065
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zen888 View Post
Wasn't able to make it outside today. My meds are making me to sleepy during the morning. I feel like I'm dying.
Tomorrow is another day hunny, try again.
You are wanting to and that's a great thing, but it is hard. These meds are new right? How long have you been on them?
Well done for trying Zen maybe set yourself a little goal for tomorrow. If you have something in mind it's sometimes easier. Can be something really small too.
Take care. Love and hugs
Molly
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Makes me work a little bit harder
Makes me that much wiser
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Thanks for this!
Zen888
  #15  
Old Mar 18, 2009, 05:26 PM
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turquoisesea turquoisesea is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2007
Location: Colorado
Posts: 9,092
*agrees*
Try tomorrow

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I'm a mess...

Yesterday I was so clever, so I want to change the world.
Today I am wise, so I am changing myself.

Thanks for this!
Zen888
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