feeling bad, please listen

I am sorry I have not been here lately for anyone. And sorry that my post is about me but I am all alone and just want to tell someone.

It is only morning here and I have the whole day to get through. I try so hard to keep occupied with my books, phoning ppl, bits and pieces, but the strength is weak today.

I am so tired of this exhaustion. Everything that happens gradually tips the scales of fatigue until it is too much and I have to rest.

My partner is going through a negative patch of anger, irritation, and sadness. Usually I can show compassion and help him to understand himself and smooth things out, but I am just not able to do that so much now.

It is thick snow here now and I don't like it, even if I wanted to go out I wouldn't. I feel so numb and like I just don't care or want to do anything at all.

I was just laying there and didn't want to speak to anyone, but I knew I had to get myself out of that. I am so glad I can post here, just to get it out of me and maybe get me up and moving. I haven't forgotten you on here and I am waiting for the day when I can come on here and do some better posts and offer support to ppl who need it.

I feel so guilty about my life as it is now. I feel I am wasting away my life and not of any useful purpose at all, its just so negative. Managing to hang in there with hope is what I can usually do. Tell myself that at least I am reading interesting stuff that I wouldn't have time for otherwise !

I just want to thank anyone who hears me out there................I hope you are all looking after yourselves ((((((((((((hugs))))))))))....Poppet

(((((((((((((((((Poppet)))))))))))))))))) I'm so sorry you're feeling so down and exhausted. Look after yourself and try not to spend too much emotional energy on other people but spend it on yourself. I know that sounds horribly selfish but it just has to be that way sometimes or you can't help other people because you are so drained yourself. Is there anything particularly relaxing you can do? Such as having a bath, colouring, cuddling your cat, that kind of thing. I don't know where in England you are but here (manchester) it's going to warm up a little at the beginning of next week so maybe it will where you are too.

I hope you manage to find some comfort in something and I hope you feel better soon .

(((((poppet)))))

Hi hon, so sorry you're feeling so low today, and please, don't apologise for it. This what the forum is here for - for you to post and vent and talk about things - good and bad.

I know it's hard not to feel guilty, but you really shouldn't - none of us can be strong all of the time, even some of the time. Don't put so much pressure on yourself.

Thinking about you, I know you'll start to feel better soon.

x

((((((((((((((((((poppet))))))))))))))))))))

I am here for you if you ever want to talk. I have quiet times also and I don't post much. PM me some time when you are ready, ok? We care here and want to help.

Take care,
Leslie

(((((((((((((((((((Poppet)))))))))))))))))))

I am so sorry that you are feeling low. Snuggling inside and pampering oneself can be nice, if one is in the right frame of mind for it.

I think this may connect with Myzen's thread about positive self-image: If I feel that I deserve to pamper myself, I can snuggle up and enjoy it. But if my self-image is negative, I can't.

I came to the forums when I was very low indeed. I felt like my recliner and laptop had become growths on my body, I moved to rarely. One of the things I started to do was post very brief responses to people -- even if it was only a hug or "sorry you feel bad today."

Eventually, I started getting positive feedback from people about how I was "there" for them, etc. This helped my positive self-image -- I began to see that I was doing "nothing" by being on the forums, or only taking care of myself, but that there was an interactive effect in this reaching out. I don't know if you have enough energy for even that . . I don't want to ask you to push yourself to do something that is just too much right now.

Please forgive yourself for being exhausted, for not doing things that you can't tackle right now, and be good to yourself.

(((((((((((((Poppet))))))))))))))

You're moving..and that's good...just take baby steps....and keep on goin...love grace

i am sorry to hear about what you are going through. but you are not alone. some of us i am sure feel the same where. i know i do. but we are here for you.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{Poppet}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

I hope you feel better soon!
nightdream

Good thoughts hon from a UK cave .....
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Hang in there ((((((((((((((poppet))))))))))))))))))

Wish I could offer you more but I am thinking of you and sending warm thoughts your way!!

Justy

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((((((((((((((((poppet)))))))))))))))))

((((poppet)))) We haven't met, but I can relate to how you are feeling, as probably most can here. Don't beat yourself up so much...you need to take care of yourself and allow yourself to take whatever it is you need for yourself to get through the rough times

poppet.....of course we hear you.....we listen well and we are open to hearing about you. that's why we're all here.....for ourselves and others. i'm sorry you're going through rough times. don't apologize.....(from the pro of apologies) pat

{*{*{*{*{*Poppet*}*}*}*}

OMG, you great big wonderful people, you came through for me. I am so grateful to all of you who heard me, where else on earth could I get such care ? Maybe I can dare to believe that I will not suffer alone as long as you are here. .

I am on the right track now in the mind (body....mmm?), mind pain a lot worse than body stuff so thats good for now. My partner is going to seek counselling and has come through his patch. Things feel better than they did .

((((((((SilverQ)))))))) I found a little comfort in simple things, the fact that I can smell (I couldn't for many years!) a gorgeous bubble bath and body lotion. And the fact that I can hear my lovely soul music, some ppl do not have even the basic senses like those. So I was grateful for the fact I do. Thankyou for reminding me of simple things to cherish.

(((((((((Wants2fly))))))))) I agree, it does help with feeling positive about yourself when you can offer support to others. I am a lot more comfortable supporting others than reaching out for support for myself. I feel good being there for others, and bad when I need the help - but I be working on it ! Thankyou for all you said.

(((((((((Grace)))))))) Hi, and thanks for reminding me about baby steps - so important and so true !

((((((((((Debbie)))))))) Hi, and thanks for your kind words - I love your fairy pic.

((((((((Justy)))))))) Hi there, thanks for sending warm thoughts my way.

(((((((Eva)))))))) Thanks for your wise words - its so easy to forget them when I'm down. But you reminded me !

((((((((Pat)))))))) Thanks for all you said - wonderful stuff. But, hey, I thought I was the pro of apologies . I had a great idea for a t-shirt for myself for those desperately 'sorry' days. Covered in the word sorry millions of times all over, then I wouldn't have to speak ! Ha ! I am not feeling like that today though that's why I can laugh at it.

(((((((((Angie)))))))))) Is that a special hug with the stars inbetween ? Thankyou !

(((((((((Phoenix)))))))))) thankyou !

(((((((((Leslie))))))))))) thankyou !

((((((((Nightdream))))))) thankyou !

((((((((FuzzyintheUK))))))) thankyou !

(((((((((Cat eye)))))))))))) thankyou !

((((((((((Kimmydawn)))))))) thankyou !

I appreciate you all so much, you have your own troubles but you were here for me. You are ALL angels - off to rest now after this, but I be back !!.........Poppet

You are so welcome. Just hang in there and we are here for you. Remember if you just want to chat one on one I am here for you.

((((((((((((((((((((((( poppet )))))))))))))))))))))))))

I don't know what else to say but that. I hope you feel better soon hun.

Ryan

Debbie, Fury and Ryan.

I am not in a good way at the moment but I need to let you know I did read your posts and it means a lot that you care.

Fury, I am Gemini and don't experience elation (highs) so do not think I am BP. But I can be very different.

I will do a better post when better, too hope you are in a better place now.

(((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))) to you all.......Poppet

i sat here just now reading your post..and i thought to myself..what an amazing person you are...like many of us you are lost..but yet you still worry about everyone and want to take care of everyone...to me it shows what an amazing heart you have...yes sometimes when we want so much to help others it drowns us..i do agree with silver..you need to care for yourself..depression is so hard...but im sure there has to be a brighter day tomorrow ..i will keep you in my thoughts and look forward to seeing more of you here...best wishes always...one step at a time...