hurt and pain closed up inside
find a place to run and hide.

not allowed to talk or say
what has made my pain today.

hold it in keep to myself
swallow hard don't share or else.

piled on are heaps of mad
hurt and anger scared and sad.

higher higher the pile grows
turning churning the stench i know.

need to find quick release
of this pressure find some peace.

old ways quickly come to mind
temptation strong and not too kind

i struggle now and contemplate
the choice i have but perhaps too late.

The pen is mightier than the sword.
Edward Bulwer-Lytton

[allthegirls6]

(((((((((((((((((white_iris))))))))))))))))))

we hear ya

[bipolar_bear]

((((((((((((((white_iris))))))))))))))))))))

[oksomaybeimnuts]

{{{{{{{{{{white_iris}}}}}}}}}}}

(((((((((white_iris)))))))))

hurting sucks.

[Mahali]

We are here to listen if you need. hugs

going thru a rough spot. lots of negative. insider telling how worthless and bad and stupid i am. i know it, but does she have to say she's going to tell T the truth about me and convince her that i'm not worth working with?? i know how bad i am and how stupid and ugly and all that, but T is starting to listen to me. she'll be driven away just like everyone else. then i'll be alone again.
naomi

[January]

(((((((((( wi ))))))))

Hugs,

Jan

[Zorah]

{{{{{white_iris}}}}}
{{{{{naomi}}}}}

Don't worry !!! Your t will not let you drive her off !!!

She knows you are not bad and worthless whatever the other insider says. You aren't stupid and ugly either.
Those negative one's are very hard to deal with, try not to listen to her (hopeless, we know) or at least try not to believe her.

Sorry not to have been here much lately, but PM if we can help, or if you want to talk.

[Evangelista]

(((White Iris)))



You are worth every breath, every heartbeat...and your T will be there along side you as you stand against the inner tormentors..and that the darkness they have dragged you into cannot, and will not remain in the light of that healing...Be gentle with yourself(s)..we care...be safe..

got really bad yesterday. bad me, bad, bad---i'm sorry i hurt myself--i'm sorry i can't take it--she's right, i am just a worthless no body.
t doesn't listen to the other. she said i have to learn ways to stand up to her. i can't. t said we'll work this out.
maybe i'm better if i don't come out any more. no good inside or outside.
stuck.
n

[Evangelista]

(((Naomi)))..((White Iris)))

Oh hun(s)..you are not bad..what was done to you(s) was really bad..

I can offer a suggestion...2 of my Docs current and past, created audio tapes for me(s) to listen to when the voices got so bad..explaining good things..talking..helping to ground..it helps to hear others outside when you are in H*ll and all you hear/feel is Hurt...maybe it may help..I dunno..it has me..I carry a small voice recorder in my handbag, and one in my Truck..once its starts to occurr I turn them on and focus on the external..trying to not be dragged in..helps not get dragged into conflict..it does not make the pain disappear..the stuff is still going on..but it allows me to function better and do less damage to "It"...

Take care..sorry..sorry..be safe...we care..you(s) are somebody(s)...we are here to listen keep posting..

[January]

((((((((((( n ))))))))))))))

You're not bad. You were mistreated and abused. It's not your fault that happened. Try hard to believe in your goodness because you are good.

Hugs,

Jan

[wanttoheal]

(((((((((white_iris)))))))))) ((((((((((naomi)))))))))))

I'm so sorry for your pain. Thinking about you, wishing peace to come for you.

trying--really...
little glimpses of smile
covered by clouds of sads.

((( everyone )))

Is H back yet?

[Gemstone]

{{{{ W_I }}}}}}}

H is back. T is available. Things just crazy...

[silver_queen]

((((((((((((( The Constellation ))))))))))))))

[allthegirls6]

((((((((((((((((((the constellation)))))))))))))))))))

[Fuzzybear]

((((((((((((((( The Constellation ))))))))))))))))

[hillbunnyb]

)) ) )) ) )))))))) the constellation (((((((((( ((( ((
))))))) ) )) ) ) white iris (((((( (( ( ( (( ( calmer days will come

[__zh]

very glad to read the T is back. so challenging to get through those times when they are not available to us. you managed! be proud that you got through this time!!

hoping that all things crazy will calm down sooner than later.

kindly,